Mass Effect: Living
by N7Commando86
Summary: This is my version of life on the Normandy between missions. Spoilers abound! Primary focus is on the relationship between Shepard and Kaidan.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

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><p>Shepard sat at her desk in her cabin looking at the newest name she needed to add to the memorial wall on the crew deck. Thane Krios had died a hero to stop the Cerberus coup on the Citadel. She sat contemplating the conversations they had had during the mission to stop the Collectors; about his wife, his son, his beliefs. She would miss him, he had been a confidante to her for the months they had spent together, her best friend. She had told him everything: how she felt about Cerberus, how she'd felt having her heart ripped out and stomped on by Kaidan on Horizon, how frustrated she was that the Alliance and the Council were stonewalling her. And they had commiserated over her guilt at destroying an entire colony to delay the reapers.<p>

She sighed, and combed her fingers through her long brown hair, before expertly and efficiently twisting it into a bun and securing it. She stood and grasped the small plaque and walked over to the door. She was surprised when she found Kaidan standing on the other side, looking a bit like a schoolboy caught peeping into the girl's locker room. "Hey, Commander. Thought you might like some company," he finally said.

She tilted her head and studied him silently for a minute, looking intently into those amber brown eyes, looking for…she wasn't sure what she was looking for. "I would love some, actually, but I need to take care of this first." She swallowed hard when she held up the plaque. "He deserves it," she murmured.

"Ah, Celia, I'm so sorry," Kaidan mumbled, and brought a comforting hand to her shoulder, drawing her close. "Would you like some help?"

"No," she breathed, "No, I need to take care of this myself. But I wouldn't mind if you wait for me up here. We can talk when I get back." She rested her head briefly on his shoulder before moving towards the elevator. "I'd like that," she heard him say to her back as the elevator doors closed behind her.

She rode down to the crew deck and found Garrus waiting for her in front of the memorial wall. "Hell of a day, Shepard."

"Yeah, things got a little tense for a while there," she said as she moved some names around and put Thane's plaque into place.

"I'm just glad Kaidan backed down. I have a question though, could you do it?"

"I don't see how, if we go around killing friends, that turns war into murder, doesn't it?" she turned to face Garrus, and gave him a small smile as he studied her.

"I'm happy for you, Shepard." Garrus said quietly. "That Kaidan is back on the ship. You seem more…relaxed."

She gave him a real smile at that, "Thank you, Garrus, you're a good friend." She turned towards the elevator, and heard Garrus say, "If he hurts you again like he did on Horizon, I have a thermal clip with his name on it!"

She shook her head, and called, "I've never needed an older brother!" as the elevator doors closed. She smiled as she rode back up to her cabin. She found Kaidan sitting at her desk studying her model ships. "Do you ever miss her?" he indicated the model of the SR1 and handed her a glass of whiskey he had poured for her while he waited.

She rested against her desk beside him, her leg just brushing his thigh. "I do. Things seemed different, easier somehow." She laughed, "It wasn't, of course. It was hell, flying by the seat of our pants, chasing a rogue Spectre, and his dreadnought." She sipped at her drink and surprised both of them by seating herself on his lap. "I've missed having you to talk to," she said softly, draping her arms over his shoulders.

He wrapped his arms around her waist, "I missed you too, Shepard." He sighed, "I hope we can move on with _this_, I've missed you and me being us." He rubbed a soothing hand up and down her back, and smiled as she leaned into him. "Do you want to tell me about Thane?"

"Hmm…" she mumbled and slowly stood up. "I'd like that, but first, let me put on my sweats. I just need to relax for a bit." She turned around to find Kaidan staring at her. She smiled at went down the stairs towards her drawers and pulled one open.

"By all means, feel free to change into something more…comfortable," he followed her down the stairs and raised an eyebrow as he sat down on the sofa in her sitting area. He heard her suppressed chuckle of laughter as she made quick work of her uniform and stood in her Alliance-issue sports bra and panties. His mouth went dry as he gazed longingly at her sleek form, long slender legs, trim waist, and the muscular abs that showed him she had been hitting the gym hard in the last year. He swallowed hard as she pulled the soft grey sweatpants up and over her hips. She walked back towards the sofa, and snagged a hoodie that was draped over the back of a chair and dragged that on as well.

She sat beside him, and pulled on a pair of fluffy wool socks. "My feet are always cold," she explained, "One day, when this is all over, we're going some place tropical, and we're going to frolic naked in the sun. I'm going to get burned to a crisp, but it will be worth it, because my feet will be warm." She leaned into him and made a contented sound when he put his arm around her and hugged her close.

"Naked, huh?" he whispered into her ear. He chuckled when he felt her shiver against him, "Sounds nice."

"Are you flirting with me, Major?" she asked, and poked him in the chest.

"Ouch," he said, more because she expected it than because it hurt, "I'm obviously out of practice." He brought one hand up and cupped her face, "I've missed this, too," he said, and brought his lips down to capture hers. The kiss was soft and sweet, and he could taste the hint of whiskey on her lips, of vanilla and smoke. She sighed against his lips and he swept in with his tongue, delving into her wet heat. Her fingers fisted in his hair and she gave a gentle tug, as his hands encircled her waist and dragged her onto his lap. With a groan, he broke the kiss and tugged the zipper of her hoodie down a few inches, and pressed his lips to her exposed collarbone, applying gentle suction. She writhed in his lap, and moaned her pleasure, feeling him smile against her throat.

"That's gonna leave a mark," she complained, and captured his lips with hers. She sucked gently on his bottom lip and smiled as he groaned again. She trailed kisses down his throat, and licked the divot in the center of his throat. She pulled away from him and held his heated gaze. "This isn't going slow, is it?"

He watched her as she licked her lips and worried her bottom lip with her straight, white teeth. "Is that what you want? To take this slowly?"

She leaned back a little and studied him, but kept her arms around his neck, "I'm not sure. I know I want this, you - us. But I worry if we take this too fast…"

He gently rubbed her back, "I know, and I agree."

"But-," she said, raising an eyebrow.

"But we don't know how much time we'll have left," he whispered fiercely, pulling her into a rough embrace. "We held a gun on each other just a few hours ago, for God's sake." His voice was husky and a bit harsh and Shepard couldn't help but be extremely turned on. "I believe in you, Celia. In us, and what we're fighting for and that we'll be successful. But we could die tomorrow, and I don't know how much time we'll have left. I don't want to regret not being with you while there is still time."

He let go of her as she moved to stand. He watched silently as she prowled around the room. He knew she was thinking, and she did her best thinking on her feet. He refilled their glasses while he waited. "Kaidan, I – I want you, as my partner, my helpmate, my bedmate," she said suggestively, and waggled her eyebrows at him, "But it can't affect the mission."

"Please, Shepard, it didn't affect it last time, and we're both professionals. We know what is at stake." He stood and moved to her, and put his hands on her slender waist. "I love you, Shepard. I just need you to know that."

She sighed, and tilted her head up to kiss him. "For tonight, let's just talk, ok?"

Kaidan nodded and led her back to the sofa and pulled her into his lap. "Tell me about Thane."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

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><p>A few days later, Shepard got a text from Kaidan on her datapad. "Can I come up?" it read. She sent him a quick reply and tried to tidy up her cabin in a hurry. There were pieces of armor lying around and a pile of dirty clothes by the bed. With a frustrated sigh, she pushed the pile into a corner and made the bed before she heard the door open.<p>

"Hey, Shepard," Kaidan walked down the stairs and grabbed her up in a passionate kiss. "Crazy day today, huh?" he said when he pulled away, and smiled at her wet hair piled on top of her head. "Do you own anything other than sweats?"

Her blue eyes twinkled at him; "I was working out with Vega, so I needed a shower."

"Working out, eh?" his hands went to her hips and pulled her flush against him. "If I know you, and I do," he said, trailing kisses over her face and down her throat, "You pushed yourself to exhaustion, so now you'll be unable to resist my significant charms." He laughed quietly against her throat as she pressed her hips against his. He sent one hand into her wet hair and removed the fasteners she used to secure it, and sent her long hair tumbling down her back. It was in a curling mass just past her shoulder blades and he gently tucked a wayward strand behind her ear. His heart skipped a beat at the gentle expression he found curving her features. "Or maybe I'm the one that can't resist," he mumbled, and crushed his lips to hers.

"Kaidan," she murmured, stroking his back, holding him close. She studied him for a moment, "You look a little pale." She stepped back from his embrace and smiled, took his hand and led him over to the sofa. "Sit," she demanded, and moved away towards the nightstand where she kept energy bars and protein snacks. "Hungry?" she asked, and grabbed a few energy bars when he nodded his assent.

He took the bar she offered him and bit into it. "So, Ardat-Yakshi. One word: wow." He grunted when she poked him hard in the gut. "Watch it," he said, and raised an eyebrow at her. "So what's the deal with Samara?"

"She's a friend, I recruited her to help with the Collectors. She's impressive in battle. She taught me the reave technique she uses. Speaking of, where did you learn it from?"

Kaidan rubbed his temple, feeling the beginnings of a migraine coming on. He had used his biotics to the limit on Lessus. "Ah, no one. I read about it on the extranet and studied the technique and just…"

She looked at him, impressed. "I'm impressed, Kaidan. Most people need someone to at least show them the basics." She placed her hands on his temples and began to gently massage. He groaned his satisfaction to let her know it was helping.

"Yeah, I've picked up a lot of new techniques, still can't float with my biotics though."

She laughed, and used one hand to massage his neck and the base of his skull. "Yeah, Jack tried to teach me that one, but she sucked as a teacher back then. She also tried to convince me to go pirate," she added thoughtfully. "I would have made a damn good pirate."

"A hot sexy pirate," Kaidan slurred softly. He was slowly losing the battle to stay conscious as she worked her magic fingers over his tense muscles. The migraine was still there, but it wasn't threatening as fiercely as it had before.

She giggled, "Sleepy?"

"Hummm…" was his reply, his eyes drifting closed.

"Kaidan? Would you like to bunk here tonight? I hate to send you back downstairs when you're getting a migraine." She paused her massage, "I, uh, had EDI bring a change of sweats and I raided the medbay for some of your pain meds, for just such an occasion.

He lazily opened one eye and peeped at her, "You planned for me to have a migraine in your cabin?" he mumbled and gently tugged her closer to his chest.

She smiled at him, "No, I planned for when you eventually started sleeping up here. It was only a matter of time before you had a migraine," she stated, and it seemed logical to him.

He shrugged, and winced as the movement caused pain to shoot through his head, he vaguely heard her request the lights be dimmed to twenty percent. The lower lighting immediately helped. He felt her move off his lap and heard her soft footfalls as she moved up the stairs toward the bathroom. He heard her rummaging around, and soon felt her come back to sit beside him on the sofa. "Left or right arm?" she asked softly, and he grunted and offered her right arm since it was closest to her. He felt her wipe the antiseptic solution over his skin to sterilize the area and hissed when she depressed the pressure syringe. Almost immediately, he started to feel relief from the drug now swimming in his system.

She placed the used syringe on the coffee table, and leaned down to help him to his feet. She dragged one arm over her shoulders and put her arm around his waist to guide him towards the bed. "Shepard," he slurred, "I love you, Shepard," he whispered before unconsciousness took him, and she gently lowered him to the bed. "I love you, too," she whispered and pressed a kiss to his lips. She straightened and began to maneuver him out of his uniform. She pushed his pants over his hips and pulled them off. She licked her lips at the sight of his hard, muscled thighs and tapered hips. She gently pulled him into a sitting position and dragged his shirt over his head and gently stroked his hard chest before laying him back down. She pulled out a pair of his sweatpants and a pair of woolly socks and pulled them on, up over his hips and carefully maneuvered him under the quilt and propped his head up on a pillow. She crawled into the bed with him, tucked the quilt around them, draped an arm over his chest and cushioned her head on his chest and fell asleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

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><p>"I hate you."<p>

Kaidan chuckled, and took a swig of his drink. "Now, Shepard, certainly you have enough patience for me to finish my sandwich.

Shepard squirmed in her seat, "Not when you are undressing me with your eyes like that," she muttered, and took a bite of her own sandwich.

He shot her another hot glance, and flicked his eyes over her appraisingly. "Am I?" he grinned at the scowl she gave him.

They sat and talked about their lives while they were separated. Kaidan told her more about growing up in Vancouver, and what it had been like before the Reapers attacked. He laughed as he reminisced about a baseball game he had played when he was in middle school.

"Hah, the bases were loaded, and I was up to bat. It was our rival team, and there was some…bad blood between me and their pitcher." He sat back, lost in thought. "There had been some taunting back and forth between us the entire tournament. He threw the pitch, and I swung. I couldn't really control my biotics back then, so I accidentally gave the ball a bit of a push. Knocked it over the fence. It was great."

She smiled at him, "I grew up on different stations and star ships. So organized sports were never really part of my childhood. I remember playing pranks on whichever parent I was living with at the time. One time, a friend and me broke into the mess, stole all the powdered fruit drink, and put it in each of the showerheads. The next time someone went to take a shower, oh man. My dad kicked my ass." She chuckled. "I definitely deserved it, too. Worse was the dressing down I got from my mom."

Kaidan smiled, "Have you heard from your mom?" he asked, when he saw her expression fall.

She shook her head, "No, not yet. Hackett promised he'd let me know if he hears anything. Have you heard anything from your mom?"

"Just that she's still alive." He glanced up when the waiter came back, and he swiped his credit chit. "Ready to go?"

"Thought you'd never ask." She stood, and smiled when he offered her his arm. "Such a gentleman," she teased, and wrapped her arm around his, lacing their fingers together. "Do you mind if we stop by the Elkoss kiosk? I promised Adams a new thermal conduit."

"Ah, sure, I just thought you wanted to get back to the ship," he leaned close to her ear, whispered suggestively. He slid a hand down her back, gave a light squeeze.

She crinkled her nose, let out a breath, "Of course I want to go back, but you made me wait, so I thought I might return the favor," she turned her head and smiled at him. "Joker also asked me to meet him at Purgatory, maybe we could go there for drinks. Maybe a little dancing?"

"Ugh, Shepard, you are a horrible dancer! Please don't torture me that way." Kaidan stumbled a little when she bumped him with her hip, before nipping into the elevator ahead of him. He grinned as she grabbed his lapels, jerked him in after her, and crushed her lips to his as the elevator door slid shut.

"Come on, it won't take long," she laughed, and hit the button for Purgatory.

"Shepard," Kaidan groaned, and rubbed his temples, "I hate bars." He didn't feel a migraine coming on, but he still wasn't fond of the lights and sounds of a bar. He followed close behind her as she elbowed her way up to the bar, and ordered two fingers of whiskey for each of them. He scanned the crowd, and gave a jerk of his head in the direction of Joker when he spotted him. He bent his mouth to her ear, "Hey, I'm gonna go grab a seat with EDI over there. Let me know when you're ready to go, okay?"

She nodded and took her drink to join Joker. "Look at this, all it took was a Cerberus attack on the citadel to get people to pay attention to the war!" Joker practically shouted to be heard over the din of the music.

"How's this any different from normal?" Shepard asked, and took a sip of her drink.

"Can't you see the desperation? This isn't happy dancing; this is forget my problems dancing. Look at the arms. If a guy waves his arms like that, he's worried about a lot more than looking stupid on the dance floor." Joker motioned towards the dance floor.

"That's surprisingly observant," Shepard frowned. The drinks she'd had at dinner, and the one she was currently polishing off at an alarming pace were beginning to take their toll.

"I've had time to watch a lot of dancing from the sidelines. Speaking of which…"

"Dancing?" she asked, a little puzzled.

"Watching from the sidelines. What do you think about me and EDI?" Joker turned and looked at Shepard, waiting for the penny to drop.

She paused to consider for a moment, and used the opportunity to finish her drink and signal the bartender for another. "Why not?"

Joker stared at her for a minute, as though he hadn't quite heard her correctly, "Because I could break a bone with some light over the clothes action."

She snorted into her glass, "Eh, that's always a risk. So are the Reapers."

"I wasn't planning on dating Harbinger," Joker studied her, a bit dumbfounded.

"You know what I mean, if we all ended up dead this time tomorrow, what would you regret," she asked, and glanced over at the table Kaidan sat at with EDI.

"Getting a shattered pelvis. And a broken heart. Such a stupid idea," he scrubbed a hand over his face, then followed her gaze.

She looked back at Joker, and studied him, "If you could be out there right now on the dance floor, would you be waving your arms?"

He sighed, "Yeah."

"Sounds like you have bigger things to worry about than looking stupid," she pointed out.

"Yeah, I guess I do. Now, if you'll excuse me," Joker turned to the bar and collected his drink, and walked over to the table to sit beside EDI.

Shepard smiled, and sat down beside Kaidan.

Garrus and Liara joined them shortly after, and drinks were ordered for the table. They all sat and enjoyed themselves as other members of the crew stopped by and more drinks were ordered.

"Hey, Lola! Wanna see the new tattoo?" Vega exclaimed as he came to join them. He slammed the first shot of tequila someone poured him.

Shepard laughed sleepily, "Sure, James," and clinked her glass against Kaidan's as she swayed drunkenly on the arm of his chair.

"Steady on, Commander," Kaidan said, and she giggled as he put a hand on her waist to steady her.

James turned his back on the group and lifted the back of his shirt to expose his newest tattoo. "Looks nice, Lieutenant, maybe I should get a matching one, after all," she slurred, and shrieked when Kaidan pulled her into his lap.

"I don't think you need any tattoos," he said, and whispered huskily in her ear, "Unless it's somewhere special, just between you and me."

"Mmm…that sounds nice," she grinned, and shot a dirty look at Garrus when he suggested they get a room. She snuggled her head on Kaidan's shoulder and listened silently to the laughter and stories her friends were swapping.

"Hey, Major, I think you lost the Commander," Joker observed, "She's drooling."

Kaidan snorted, and gathered her up in his arms, "I guess I'll take her back to the ship now. See you tomorrow." Everyone said goodbye as he stood up and cradled his burden to his chest and made his way back to the ship. He stumbled along a little himself, and cursed the copious amounts of liquor they had both consumed.

He made it back to her cabin without incident and she woke up for a few minutes as he forced her to rehydrate, and got her dressed in a soft cotton t-shirt and sweat pants. He tucked her into bed and pulled her in close to him as he fell asleep.

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><p><em>Author's Note: Thanks everyone for adding alerts and favorites for this story! I sincerely appreciate it, and I hope I don't let you down!<em>


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Just a quick warning, this chapter is pretty heavy on the smut. I debated with myself for hours before posting, but all in all, I'm pretty happy with it. If it's not your thing, you may want to wait until the next chapter. Enjoy!_

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><p>Kaidan woke the next morning to find Shepard draped across him, her legs tangled in his. He rolled to his side and tucked her in close, and simply held her. He glanced down when he noticed that her mouth was slightly open and she was drooling against his chest. He tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear, and cupped her face with his hand and bent his head down and pressed his lips to hers.<p>

He ran his hand up and down her side and massaged her hip. He slipped his hand beneath her cotton t-shirt, and found her breast, cupping it and rolled her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. He pressed a kiss to her exposed collarbone and sighed as he felt a moan vibrate in her throat.

Shepard struggled out of sleep to find her body was on fire with sensation. She found herself moaning deep in her throat, and as she took stock, she found that Kaidan was doing the most delicious things to her body. Unwittingly, she arched her back, rubbing herself against his arousal. Instinctively, she tilted her head back to give him better access to her throat, and groaned as he kissed his way up the column of her throat. She rubbed her hands over his bare chest, down to the waist of his sweat pants. With a slight smirk, she reached in and grasped his erection, lightly stroking, circling the head with her fingers.

He gasped and jerked his hips as she stroked him, and redoubled his efforts, finding her pebbled nipple and taking it into his mouth through her shirt, lightly biting down, then suckling the insult, smiling against her when she arched against him. He paused his attentions for a moment to draw her shirt over her head and tossed it to the floor. He made quick work of her sweats and panties so she lay naked before him. He sucked in a breath, "Beautiful," he murmured, stroking his hands over her taut belly, filling each hand with her breasts. He smirked as she arched her back, and tried to tug him back down to her. He bent his head to one pert nipple, then the other, and moved his way down her lean body, trailing kisses as he went.

She held her breath as he pressed a kiss to her hip and swirled his tongue, applying gentle suction. He continued his way down, and with a devious grin, lifted her hips and stuffed a pillow under them to give him better access. He parted her thighs and wrapped an arm under one leg and over her belly, firmly locking her into place. She wiggled her hips when he pressed a kiss to the sensitive skin of her inner thigh, and felt the light scrape of teeth. She felt the sharp spike in her biotics as her arousal grew, and bucked her hips when she felt one long, slow, impossibly light stroke of his tongue over the sensitive bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs.

"Kaidan, I-"

He let out a puff of air, and grinned evilly when she thrashed her head against the pillow. He drew his free hand down to her hot, wet center, and slowly pushed one finger into her core. He heard her panting breaths as he put his mouth to her again, tongue swirling, licking, stroking, taking in the taste that was all Shepard. He sighed against her, and slowly removed his finger, soon replacing it with two, setting a slow thrusting pace that he knew was driving her wild, if the arching of her back, and bucking of her hips was any indication. He heard the hitch in her breath, and the long, low moan that broke from her throat as she reached her climax.

He felt her go boneless for a moment as he resumed his ministrations, running his tongue over her folds, pressing lips, applying suction, nibbling with teeth, and within minutes he was rewarded again, this time with his name on her lips.

She sat half way up, still partially pinned by his grip on her waist, and tugged on his shoulders. He glanced up at her from the junction at her thighs and looked at her wolfishly. She swallowed hard. "Let me," she said faintly. She felt, rather than saw, the smile he gave her, which drew another soft moan from her as he trailed kisses up the plane of her abdomen, between her breasts, pausing to give each pert nipple a languid kiss. Having had enough, she scissored her legs around him, and flipped their positions.

He fisted a hand in her hair and brought her lips to meet his. He felt her hands exploring his chest, shoulders, and stomach, down to the low riding waistband of the pants he still wore. She pushed them down, letting her hands run over his long, muscular legs. With a sigh, she pulled his pants off and left them in a heap on the floor. He watched as she crawled back up his body, pausing to run her hands up his thighs and over his thick erection. He growled as she pressed feather light kisses to his abs and chest, to his collarbone and throat, and suckled on his earlobes. He crushed her to him as she capture his mouth with hers, they dueled with their tongues, leaving them both gasping for air.

"I need you, Celia. Now." He ground out, as he rubbed his arousal against her. She straddled him, and gasped when she felt his broad head against her tight, wet entrance. In one quick movement, Kaidan seated himself fully in her, and watched as she went cross-eyed, and threw her head back as a groan escaped her.

"God, you feel so good!" she panted, and began to ride him, slowly at first, loving the slide of him inside her. He laced his fingers in hers, and filled his other hand with her breast, kneading, making her breath hitch as she rode him.

"Celia, I'm going to-" he grunted, thrusting his hips to match her rhythm, and their voices mingled in the air of her cabin as they each reached their glorious climax as she slumped against him. Slowly, he pulled out of her, and she made her dissatisfaction of that act known. He pulled her into a tight embrace, and stroked her hair. "I love you, Shepard," he whispered.

"I love you, too," she sighed into his shoulder. "Do we have to go to work today? I have energy bars, lets just stay up here all naked and warm."

"Hmm…that sounds great in theory, but we promised we'd recover that Prothean artifact on Eden Prime, remember?" he raised an eyebrow when she sat up, sheets pulling tightly around her. He groaned, "Although, if you give me a few minutes…" an evil glint lit his eyes as he gripped her waist and rolled atop her.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

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><p>She sought out Garrus later that day, as he'd mentioned that he wanted to speak to her. When she walked in the Battery, she overheard a transmission from his father. "Dad. Dad! Dammit." Garrus punched the console when the only reply was static.<p>

"Hey, Garrus. That didn't sound too good," she put a comforting hand over his.

"I – no, it didn't. Dammit, Shepard, who else do we have to lose to win this damn war? First Mordin, then Thane. Kaidan's dad is missing, Joker hasn't heard from his family. It's almost like…there's no one left to fight for," Garrus hung his head in a moment of weakness.

"Hey," she replied sharply, "That's no way to talk. We fight for the ones left standing when this is all over! I fight for my crew, so they'll have a home left when this is all over." She nodded firmly, "We fight, so you can go back to Palaven to rebuild," she added softly.

"You have such a way with the speeches," Garrus chuckled, grateful that she was attempting to bolster his resolve.

"It's not just a speech, Garrus. I mean it."

"Kaidan is a lucky man," Garrus said, and nearly grinned when her face flushed red.

"Jesus, Vakarian, not you, too," she muttered furiously, looking away from him. "You know, I was going to take Kaidan with me to Eden Prime, but maybe I'll take you just so I can take a few pot shots at you."

"No, no, by all means, take Kaidan. I'll, uh, stay here, you know, calibrating."

She was walking by the men's restroom on her way to the lounge when Kaidan ran into her, grasping her firmly by the arms to keep her from falling over. "I hope it was me you were thinking about so intently," he murmured, and with a quick look around, drug her into the restroom and overloaded the door. Pressed her firmly up against it, and lowered his mouth to hers.

"I – maybe," she said coyly, and looked up at him with hooded eyes. "Shepard, the women's restroom is on the starboard side of the ship." They both groaned at EDI's announcement. "Thank you, EDI," she ground out as she pushed away from the door. They walked the short distance to the elevator, "I was coming to find you, actually. I need you to suit up, you're going down with me," she told him as they made the quick trip to the shuttle bay.

She blushed when she heard his low, husky "I'd rather go down _on_ you," as they stepped out into the shuttle bay and ruthlessly repressed a shiver. They both kept straight faces as James walked past them on his way to the elevator, and shot her a wink, "For the record, so would I, Lola." She didn't have to look at Kaidan to know he was scowling at the Lieutenant.

"Relax, he's harmless," she said, and slapped a warning hand on his chest.

He gritted his teeth, and just grunted at her.

"Such a he-man. I think you're jealous," she glanced around, and shimmied between him and the armory console. She laid both of her hands against his chest, and smiled up at him.

He glanced down at her, and lifted an eyebrow. "I think you do it on purpose," he said, and dropped a kiss to her forehead before stepping back from her. "Hey, Liara," he greeted as the asari came over to collect her armor. He help them into their suits, and checked the seals for them before donning his own. Shepard gave him a hearty slap on the shoulder to indicate he was good to go before they clipped on their weapons and made their way to the shuttle.

On the shuttle ride back, Shepard tried to ignore the stares of their newest squad member as Kaidan grumbled about her new fighting style once more as he applied medigel to a wound on her arm. "Honestly, Kaidan, twenty five percent of the time, my shields come back up fully when I charge someone. I don't see what the big deal is. It was never an issue before."

Kaidan pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled loudly, "Yeah, well, before you didn't go flying across a battlefield and slam into some unsuspecting fool, leaving yourself with no cover. You also seldom blasted someone in the face with your shotgun," he added thoughtfully.

"I do not understand. Why is the human-Major so protective of the human-Commander?" the Prothean asked nobody in particular. They all chose to ignore his comment.

"I was only grazed, Kaidan. I'm fine. We're certainly heading back to the ship in better shape than we were last time we came here."

"At least you're conscious this time," he said as he gave her another once over. He leaned close to her, "Although, I could still carry you back to the ship, we'll just forgo the medbay this time, and head straight for your cabin," he murmured, for her ears alone, and smiled as she flushed red.

"I begin to understand, your pheromones tell me much," the Prothean grumbled, and turned his head away from them.

"Someone is grumpy," Shepard muttered to Kaidan, and grinned at Liara when she choked on a laugh.

The rest of the trip back was pretty standard, aside from the occasional smoldering look between Kaidan and Shepard. They kept their distance from each other until Liara and the Prothean stepped off the elevator on the engineering level, and barely managed to keep their hands to themselves until they reached her cabin.

"Watching you in action was so sexy," Kaidan muttered, trapping Shepard against her empty fish tank, his hands balled in fists on either side of her head.

"You aren't so bad yourself, Major," she drawled, her hands busily unfastening his ACU's, tilting her head up as he captured her lips. She groaned as he reached down and cupped her bottom, lifting so she could wrap her legs around his waist.

"Commander, Admiral Hackett would like to speak to you on vid-com."

"Dammit," Shepard groaned and Kaidan reluctantly released her. "I'll be right there," she said, as she patted her hair to make sure she was still presentable. With a quick kiss, and a promise to return shortly, she jogged to the elevator.


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Thank you all for adding this story to your favorites and alerts! And huge thanks for the lovely reviews! I honestly never thought anyone would actually enjoy it, much less enough to write a review for it. It makes me giddy to read them! Now, onward!_

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><p>She had an uncanny way of making him feel uncomfortable, the way she'd come up behind him in the cockpit and stand just to the right of his chair, not moving, and not saying a word, Joker thought, fiddling with his console. He turned his seat around and gave her a slanted look. "So, you and Kaidan, huh?"<p>

She carefully schooled her features to keep her expression cool. "I don't know what you are talking about, Joker."

"Please, Commander, I'm not an idiot. Kaidan hasn't been sleeping in his bunk during his rotation for the past few weeks." He turned back to his console, "Plus, you've got a hickey on the left side of your neck," he snickered, wishing he had a mirror so he could see the look on her face. Oh well, he'd ask EDI to see the footage of it after she left.

"Shepard, I have a question about human behavior, more specifically, about human mating rituals," EDI intoned, almost as if it was planned that way.

Shepard hunched her shoulders a little, and resisted the urge to pull her collar up around her neck. She thought she had checked thoroughly that morning, but maybe she had missed it. Or it could have happened when they had run into each other and he had dragged her into life support and taken her against the wall…Dammit, she thought, and felt the heat creeping up her neck, that had to have been when it happened.

"Shepard?" EDI inquired again, and Joker sniggered again when he furtively glanced back to see the faraway expression on her face.

She sighed, "What is your question, EDI?"

"It relates to Jeff's observation. Do humans frequently feel the need to 'mark' one's partner? In addition, why do humans seem to mate as frequently as possible in multiple locations as you and the major seem int-."

"All right!" Shepard interrupted, feeling the heat rise in her cheeks. "Ah, I wouldn't say that humans try to 'mark' each other, EDI. It's more of a heat of the moment kind of thing. Plus, when it happens, it usually feels…nice." She cleared her throat, "As for your other question, I'll let Joker explain that one." With that, she fled the cockpit. She distinctly heard Joker quietly asking EDI, "Wait, so where have they been getting busy?" as she was leaving.

"Commander, you have a new message waiting for you," Traynor said as she walked by. "I believe it was James inviting you to join the crew for a poker night, tomorrow."

"Thanks, Traynor, sounds like fun."

She took the elevator down to the crew deck, and found Kaidan taking care of some Spectre expense reports in the observation lounge. "Hey there, wanna take care of my reports for me? I hate paperwork." She nearly whined, waggling her eyebrows at him.

He laughed, "No offense, Shepard, but you hate doing reports because usually you have to explain why X blew up Y."

She snorted, "Yeah, it tends to put a damper on things." She sat next to him, and smiled when he put an arm around her and gave her a quick squeeze before going back to his reports. "So, Vega wants to have a poker night tomorrow night. You in?"

He smirked, " You are a terrible poker player, why would you want to lose all your money to him or the rest of the crew?"

"I am not! I've been working on my poker face." She said, and tried to keep a straight face as he set the datapad he'd been working on aside and turned to her. "I killed Ken and Gabby when we played last year."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Prove it." He set his fingers to her ribs and lightly tickled, and nearly laughed out loud at the look on her face as she tried to repress her laughter. She started breathing hard at the effort to keep a calm expression on her face. "Your face is too expressive, Shepard. When you have a good hand, everyone knows it. When you have a bad hand, everyone knows it." He gave her a quick kiss before she pushed to her feet. "Scram," he grunted, and gave her a solid pat on the behind.

She pouted for a minute before making up her mind to get a solid work out in before they hit the relay to head to the Perseus Veil.

"Tali is our expert on geth software, she'll be in charge of security and hacking," Shepard announced as she, Kaidan, and Tali stepped out of the airlock and into the docking tube.

"Good to see you again, Tali," Kaidan said, nodding at Tali.

"You too, Kaidan. How's the omni tool? Still running the Logic Arrest?"

"It's still the best model."

"Not for running multiple attack processes simultaneously. You need a Nexus."

"Nexus shield enhancements are years behind the curve."

That's why you over-clock the micro-frame," Tali replied.

"Ah, I'm still here. Unless you two want to get a room," Shepard grumbled, and listened as EDI told her about a problem with the docking tube. "Nothing is ever easy," she said with a sigh; and she activated her grav-boots and made her way across.

Shortly after, she was opening the airlock to let Kaidan and Tali aboard. "You okay, Shepard?" Kaidan asked, and held out a hand as she jumped down from the platform she was standing on.

She stumbled and he caught her to him to steady her. "I am now," she replied huskily.

"Keelah, and you told us to get a room," Tali grumbled as she extended the bridge.

Shepard grinned behind her helmet as she felt Kaidan's gloved hand on the small of her back, "Sorry, Tali," she said contritely.

"No, you aren't," Kaidan said, keying in to her private frequency. He caught the gleam in her eyes through the visor of her helmet. "Is that your new Serrice chestplate? Looks good. Sexy. Hugs you in all the right places," he told her, his voice husky. He bit back a laugh at odd, strangled noise she made over the comm.

"Shepard, are you all right?" Tali asked, as she studied the Commander with concern evident in her voice.

Shepard swallowed, "Uh, I'm fine, I'm just – God, it's hot in here. I think my environmental regulator is malfunctioning," she stammered as she crouched to take cover.

Still keyed to her private frequency, "Nope, that's all me," he said, as he crouched beside her, and pretended to check her suit with his omni-tool. "I could tease you all day, Commander," he said, and touched his helmet to hers.

She sighed, "And I would let you." She straightened her shoulders and unclipped her shotgun. "Let's get to work."

Kaidan stood by as Shepard glared the quarian Admiral down. He placed a restraining hand on her shoulder when she belted Han'Gerrel in the gut and told him to get the hell off her ship. He escorted the quarian to the airlock. "Admiral, a word," he said through gritted teeth as the door to the airlock slid shut.

"Yes, Major, what is it now?" Han'Gerrel wheezed, and attempted to straighten to his full height.

In a sudden motion, Kaidan grasped him by his shoulders, and brought his knee up sharply into his stomach, and released him as Han'Gerrel fell to the floor. He grabbed him by his shoulders, and hauled back him to his feet, slammed him into the wall. "You are very, very lucky," Kaidan growled, "Lucky that I don't kill you for that stunt you just pulled. If you ever, and I do mean, _ever,_ put Tali'Zorah or Shepard into danger like that again, I will hunt you down like the varren that you are. You are a disgrace to your rank," he hissed.

Han'Gerrel sputtered, "How dare you!"

"I _dare_ a great deal! You just endangered the galaxy's only hope for winning this war for your own selfish gain! Now get off this ship before I do something I may one day regret." Kaidan glared at him as the quarian limped off to his own ship. He turned and walked to the cockpit where Joker was watching him with what looked like awe. "EDI, make sure the surveillance feed shows Gerrel leaving the ship. Delete the rest of the footage."

"Yes, Major," EDI replied, and, after waiting a moment, said, "Major, I have a question about human behavior."

Kaidan sighed, "Now is not the time, EDI."

"Ah, you gonna punch everyone that puts her in danger? I'm just saying, there's already a pretty long line," Joker asked, and quickly turned around. "Shepard on your six, Major," he added in a low voice.

Kaidan turned around smoothly, "Hey, I just wanted to make sure the Admiral made it back to his ship."

She scowled at him, "You kneed him in the gut?" she asked incredulously.

"I think he's confusing me with you, Commander. While I am spectacular, I'm no where near as good looking," Kaidan teased, a little put off when she just ignored him.

"EDI, let me see the feeds from the airlock for the last ten minutes." She narrowed her eyes at Kaidan when it showed precisely what he'd asked for. "I'll be in the armory. My Eviscerator has some upgrades waiting to be installed." The look she shot him nearly made his knees tremble. She turned on her heel and walked away.

"You are in so much trouble," Joker drawled, and snickered as Kaidan just rubbed his forehead.

He cornered her in the armory where she was looking at the console for weapon upgrades. He jerked his head towards the elevator at the few crewmen down there, and almost grinned at the exodus toward the exit. "You know, for all that the geth make me damn uncomfortable, being stuck in the storage compartment with you in my lap has to take the cake," Kaidan murmured in against her ear, and rested his hand on the console on either side of her. He smirked as she pressed her back against him.

"One would almost think you hadn't enjoyed it," she said, and suppressed a groan when he nipped at her ear.

"Oh, I enjoyed it. I enjoyed it enough that I wish we didn't have this damn poker game tonight." Kaidan sucked in a sharp breath when her elbow made contact with his ribs. "I…don't think I deserved that."

She turned to face him, her displeasure evident on her face, "Oh, no? You almost caused a diplomatic incident!" she drilled a finger into his chest and pushed him back.

"No proof," he wheezed, sucking in a deep breath and wincing as he did so.

"Kaidan, in general, I'm a very tolerant person," he snorted before she continued, "Just don't lie to me."

"I didn't, or I was going to tell you the truth, just not in the middle of the CIC. I won't apologize to him. He deserved it." He cupped her face in his hands, and watched the transformation as her face went from a hard scowl to a softer smile.

"He was a dick," she sighed, "I'm still mad at you."

"Yeah, you are," he said, and touched his lips to hers.


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Poker night, therefore salty language, innuendo, oh, and some smut ensue. Enjoy!_

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><p>That evening, she found herself seated next to Kaidan as he gave her some pointers for her cards. He had casually draped an arm over her shoulders as he whispered suggestions on how to play. She scowled as Vega teased her for losing her last three hands. "It would be helpful if you bluffed some, like you do on a battlefield, or when you're talking down some batarians," Kaidan whispered. "Or pretend you're playing cards with the Illusive Man. It's a little intimidating when you talk to him."<p>

"Easy for you to say, you keep winning," she muttered back, taking another sip of whiskey he'd poured for her, feeling it warm her belly. "Besides, Vega might piss himself if I did that."

"Bring it on, Lola," James laughed.

Joker looked over at them, and grinned as Kaidan straightened up to deal the next hand. They all talked and laughed, and looked up as Garrus came in to join them, followed shortly by Tali, Ken, and Gabby. Legion also joined the table, but the group refused to deal him in. It was rumored that he cheated at cards. Shepard and Kaidan scooted around the table to make room for everyone else. "Guys, did anyone invite Javik or Liara?" Silence met her, and she glared at them all.

"Well, Liara was busy violating our privacy, she wasn't interested. Javik is an ass, so why would we want him here, again?" Joker asked with a shrug.

Shepard glanced at her cards and nearly crowed as she was dealt a good hand, and promptly forgot about Javik and Liara, and narrowed her eyes at everyone around the table, "I'll see your twenty, and raise you fifty." She watched as Vega studied her, and called her.

In a moment of surprise to everyone, but as the alcohol was flowing freely, no one had the wherewithal to care, he added, "Call, Lola, but I'll also bet my shirt."

Everyone laughed as she studied him. Kaidan raised an eyebrow, he didn't particularly want her shirtless in front of everyone, but he knew she was probably wearing a sports bra under her gym gear, so he shrugged. "Call."

Garrus, Tali and Gabby threw their cards down on the table and pushed back to watch the rest of the exchange. Joker, who was now sitting beside Kaidan, whispered to him, "I'm surprised you'd risk anyone else seeing her topless."

"I'm going to win this hand, so it will only benefit me," he muttered back, and smirked when Shepard glanced over at him, and he alone noticed her pink tongue dart out to lick her lips as she flicked her eyes over him.

"All right, show 'em," James declared, throwing down a pair of twos and fives.

Joker scowled, "I got nothing." Ken followed up with three sixes.

Shepard laughed and threw down a full house, sevens and fours, "Full house!" she crowed." Take off your shirts of boys!"

"Not so fast, Shepard," Kaidan grinned and laid his cards on the table. "Straight flush." They all looked in disbelief at the flush of hearts on the table.

"Damn," she muttered.

Joker, Ken, and James had already removed their shirts, and they looked at her expectantly. She glared as James when he encouraged her, "Make it sexy for us, Lola!"

Kaidan leaned torward her, "Mmm…yeah, make it sexy," he murmured into her ear.

"Fine," she stood and grabbed the hem of her shirt and slowly dragged it over her head, baring her flat stomach and trim waist, rolling her hips a little, then, unexpectedly, a black lace bra that Kaidan could just see the outline of her nipples. She gave a little shimmy directed at Kaidan, and winked at James.

James whistled, "Don't take me on the next mission, Lola, I'll be too distracted."

"Even more distracted, you mean?" she asked as she tossed her shirt to Kaidan. "Garrus, are you blushing?" she teased when she caught him staring.

Garrus stammered and looked away, "Uh, it's not every day I get to see my best friends…assets."

She let out a laugh and sat back down. Vega dealt the next hand, but at a motion from Kaidan, left him out. Everyone teased him, but he just retorted with, "I'm not gonna try my luck, plus, I don't want the Commander to win her shirt back just yet."

She shot him a dirty look, but focused on her cards. A moment later, she felt his hand massaging the inside of her thigh; thumb brushing against the hem of her loose gym shorts. Instinctively, she let her thighs fall open to give him better access. "Good girl," he whispered in her ear as he leaned in close to her, under the guise of giving her some advice about her cards. She ruthlessly suppressed a shiver as she felt his thumb find the edge of the panties she was wearing, and slowly, oh so slowly run along under the edge, almost touching her most sensitive area, but not quite. "You're already wet for me," he whispered, keeping a cool, inscrutable expression on his face.

She swallowed, but kept her gaze level and calm, never mind that he was wreaking havoc on her senses, and forced her self to focus on the game. His fingers found the sensitive cluster of nerve endings and lightly fondled it. Her breathing picked up a bit, but she stayed calm, and reached for her glass of whiskey. "You really want this, don't you?" he whispered as he pushed one finger inside her hot core and felt her muscles contract around him.

She was staring hard at Vega, trying to read him, trying not to moan her pleasure at the delicious things Kaidan was doing to her under the table. She nearly looked at him in disbelief as he calmly took a sip of his drink, as though nothing was happening. He pushed two fingers inside and pumped slowly, using his thumb to work at her tender nub. She was close, he could practically smell it, and if her walls clenching around his fingers were any indication he should probably stop teasing her. He started to pull away, but felt her hand grip him firmly to hold him in place and still holding her cards, turned as it to consult him, "If you stop, I'll torture you," she whispered harshly, "Finish what you started."

He dimly heard Vega bet his pants, and heard Shepard agree. Heard the soft, strangled noise she made as she came against his hand while throwing down her winning hand. She took a deep breath, "Make it sexy for me, Vega," she grinned, and no one noticed that her eyes had gone just a bit glossy for a few minutes, or that Kaidan gently kissed her neck. All eyes were on Vega as he stripped off his pants and made a show of teasing Tali and Gabby.

"I heard Purgatory is hiring male dancers, Vega," Garrus teased the Marine.

"Nah, they wouldn't be able to handle me," James grinned, then turned to Shepard, "Hey, Lola, your poker face was damn near perfect that round, what's the deal?" He tossed his pants across the table to her.

"I had some helpful advice," she said deadpan, snatching his pants out of the air.

"Shepard, you're not nearly as mean when you play with the Major," Ken spoke up, and Shepard had to fight to keep from spitting her drink across the table. "You still play like shit though," he grinned, and rubbed his ribs when Gabby gave him a sharp elbow.

"You all right there?" Kaidan grinned, he hadn't missed Donnelly's double entendre, and he hadn't expected her to keep a straight face either. "All right, deal me back in. I want those shorts next," he told her in hushed tones, and smirked as her cheeks turned red.

The game continued, with everyone but Tali losing an article of clothing or two. Shepard sat at the table in just her lace panties, trying in vain to cover her breasts by crossing an arm over her chest. "I'm done," she announced and stood up drunkenly. Kaidan grinned wolfishly at the view she presented, toned and slender all over, arms crossed over her chest and see through black lace panties.

"Come on, Lola, you don't want to bare all?" James teased.

She shot him a saucy grin, and shook her head.

"Me too," Kaidan said and threw his cards on the table. He gathered up their clothing, and quietly said he'd walk her up to her cabin. They left the lounge to catcalls from the rest of the crew.

"So, uh, how long have the Commander and the Major been going at it?" James asked, peering at Joker over his cards.

Joker snickered, "Well, they were tip toeing around each other the entire time on the original Normandy," he tossed his cards on the table and settled in for a gossip session. "I remember when she took him out in the Mako once and broke the damn thing. I told her it would be 24 hours before we could manage a pick up. I lied. You should have seen the two of them when they climbed out of that thing back on the ship."

Garrus grimaced, "It reeked of sex for days. Human sex must be…messy."

"That's how you know you're doing it right_, pendejo_!" James laughed.

"It's about damn time they did something about it. The flirting and innuendo was driving me crazy," Joker said, and stole a glance at EDI.

Tali snorted, "And that is different from now, how?"

Garrus spoke up, "She was pissed when we ran into him on Horizon. I literally watch as she threw her helmet across the shuttle bay. It cracked and she had to get a new one. From what I understand, she had pretty strong feelings for him still."

"I never figured Shepard to be one to fraternize," James intoned, curious about the Commander.

"I think they both deserve some peace," Tali said quietly, "They've been through hell."

EDI stood from the sofa where she had been observing the group silently for the past thirty minutes. "After scanning Shepard's records, she has not reported to the medical bay for her monthly fertility suppressant since the beginning of this tour of duty. If she is sexually active, this could present a problem. Records also indicate this is habitual behavior for her."

The group stared at EDI. "She what?" Joker shouted. "Oh God, what if she's…?" James and Joker both turned pale, and Garrus' face took on a horrified expression. "EDI, can you do a scan or something?"

"Scanning…My scan indicates there is no presence of the human Chorionic Gonadotropin hormone indicative of pregnancy in human females. However, if it were very early in pregnancy, it would not be detected by my scan. I have sent a memo to Dr. Chakwas recommending she remind Shepard she is due for her monthly suppressant."

Frantically, James did the math in his head, "EDI what would be the earliest you could notice if she is pregnant or not? The Major has only been on board for a month or so."

"My scanners are sensitive enough to detect it at five weeks post conception."

"Oh Jesus," Joker muttered, and slid down in his chair. "This is a freaking nightmare."


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Thanks again for the reviews! I feel I have an outlet for my love of Shenko here. Apologies for the length of this one, I know it's a bit short, but I think it speaks for itself._

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><p>"Admiral, you're needed back at the civilian fleet," Shepard said firmly. "Without you, the Civilian Fleet will attempt to flee, and millions of quarians will die."<p>

"Damn calculus of war," Garrus muttered over her shoulder as they hurried toward the waiting shuttle.

Shepard shot him a glance, "If we have time, we'll attempt to double back and pick up the rest of your people. We won't abandon them, Admiral."

There was silence on the comm. as they awaited Koris' reply. "Very well, sending my coordinates now.

"Shepard, he's pinned down!" Kaidan yelled over the sound of the shuttle's engine.

"Not for long! Cover him!" she shouted as she took the helm of the mounted gun. She laughed wickedly as Garrus made quick work with his sniper rifle. The Primes swarming the area were no match for her over-powered gun, and soon enough the quarian Admiral was sprinting towards shuttle.

"Shepard, heads up!" Kaidan yelled, and she neatly nipped to the side as a rocket aimed at her head whizzed harmlessly by. "Go, go, go!" Kaidan hollered at Cortez, and quickly gripped Shepard by her shoulders to look her over. He crushed her to him hard when he saw she had only bruises and scratches. "That was too close," he whispered.

"I'm fine, Kaidan. Can you make sure Koris is all right?" She asked gently, as he was their field medic. He nodded, and after briefly brushing a loose piece of hair behind her ear went to look over the quarian. She went to the front of the shuttle, and quietly instructed Cortez to make a sweep by the last known location of the civilians, but they found no one.

That evening, Kaidan found her face down on the bed, wearing only her favorite hoodie. He padded down the steps in his sleep pants, "Mmmm, you present me with a view like that, I may have to take advantage," he growled, and sat on the bed at her feet and drew them into his lap. He pressed his thumb firmly into the arch of one foot, and with slow strokes, massaged her feet, eliciting a groan from her.

She rested her chin on her forearms. She sighed, "I know it was the right choice to make, save the leader to save the fleet. But it doesn't make it any easier."

"I know, Shepard, but it's up to us to make the hard choices, and normally it is at a cost," Kaidan said, and with one last sure stroke, picked up her other foot and repeated the procedure.

"It's hard to think straight when you're doing that," she groused, and groaned again as he stroked her calves and worked the firm muscles there.

"That is rather the point," he said drolly, and tickled the backs of her knees.

She grinned as his hands crept up her thighs, firmly rubbing the knots he found, and she closed her eyes as the stress left her. "It's frustrating."

"What is?" he asked absently, his fingers brushing the sensitive flesh of her inner thighs, felt her quiver against him. He flipped her over on her back, and drew the hoodie off her shoulders before rolling her back to her belly.

"Ah, the quarians. They're so damn selfish. What were they thinking, arming their liveships and dragging them into this stupid war? Oh, don't stop," she moaned, as one thumb briefly brushed against her heat.

"Mmm, I have no plans to," he murmured against her skin as he bent over her, and pressed his lips to the small of her back. "Maybe they wanted something to come home to when this is over. Some hope for the future," Kaidan mused, and skimmed his hands over the rounded globes of her posterior. She rolled her hips as he kneaded the muscles along her spine, and she whimpered when he kissed a line along her shoulders.

"You need to relax, darling," he said as he slid a hand down her back and nudged her thighs apart, and caressed the soft flesh there. His thumb fondled the delicate bundle of nerves, and he pressed his lips to her spine as she writhed against his hand.

"I don't get it," she panted, and pressed her forehead to her pillow as he slipped a finger into her tight sheath. She murmured his name on a sigh as his lips traveled over the smooth skin of her back. "I've never, mmm… never needed someone to protect me before in my life," she drawled out on a moan, "But when you go all cave man on me, oh," she whimpered as the one finger was joined by a second. "It's hot."

He smiled against her shoulder as he leaned over her, "You know, your vocabulary goes out the window when you're turned on," he murmured, and laced her fingers with his. "I want you, Shepard," he nibbled her ear, "I want you hot and wet, panting beneath me."

"What happened to the shy lieutenant I use to know," she gasped and ground herself against his hand.

He released her hand and quickly stripped off his pants, lifted her hips from the bed and poised himself against her entrance. "You happened," he rumbled as he slid home. She sighed his name as he set the pace, working her into a frenzy. His pace quickened when he felt her fingers clenching one muscled thigh, her nails biting into his skin. He leaned over her, and grasped her other hand currently twisting in the sheets, laced their fingers. He nuzzled the back of her neck, and feeling her muscles contracting around him, scraped his teeth over the sensitive skin there. She gasped as she tumbled over the edge, seconds later he joined her. He rolled to his side and pulled her close to him as he spooned her. He kissed her as she turned her head, and cupped her cheek. They snuggled together until sleep claimed them both.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

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><p>"Commander, we received a message from Admiral Hackett. There's been an emergency on Cyone. A fuel depot has gone silent, and he wants us to investigate," Traynor told Shepard as she was passing by.<p>

"All right, we'll have to put off taking care of those geth fighters. Joker, get us to the Silean Nebula."

She had Garrus and James suit up to go with her, as Kaidan was currently drugged up to his eyeballs with migraine meds. They found Captain Riley and her team working to fix the fuel reactors. She was finding herself getting annoyed with Garrus and James as they were sticking to her like glue. "Ah, guys, let me breathe," she said, trying to get them to give her some space.

She was further annoyed when she went to peek over the edge of the walkway, and Garrus reached out and jerked her back. She gave him a strange look and started to speak before Riley interrupted and explained how to fix the reactors.

As she ran around, venting the area, and getting the generators back online, she was more and more curious when James and Garrus insisted on doing most of the work for her, leaving her standing safely in areas where that hadn't previously been irradiated.

She was waiting for the ambush when it came, and took cover, picking off husks and those strange turian looking husks as they came at her. She stood up to charge at one, and growled when James shoved her back into cover and Garrus shot the one she was aiming at in the head. She shoved James out of her cover and snarled at them as she surveyed the area and found it all clear. She rounded on James, "What the fuck was that, Lieutenant?" She drilled a finger into his chest, and made him stagger back.

"Uh, it was the last one, so no need to take risks, right, Lola." James gave her a sheepish grin. She smacked her hand on his shoulder, and pointed towards the extraction point. "Get moving."

"Gah, I miss Gardner," Shepard complained as she slumped on the sofa next to Kaidan. He peeped at her from beneath the arm he currently had draped over his eyes.

"Eh, your voice, keep it down, please," Kaidan winced, "Still recovering."

"Sorry," she said softly, and took his hand and laid her head on his shoulder. "Anyway, Gardner, that man could cook," she said, before she rubbed a hand over her aching stomach. "Whoever made dinner tonight, it doesn't agree with me."

Kaidan frowned, and lowered his arm, and pressed a kiss to her cheek. "You'll feel better tomorrow."

"Hope so. Garrus and James were acting strange today," she said, "It was odd, they wouldn't let me do anything. They didn't say anything about it, they just jumped to it before I could say no."

"So you're complaining because they were more efficient?"

"It's not that," she scowled, "I was targeting a husk to charge, and James shoved me back into cover, and Garrus shot it in the head."

"Hmm, I think I should go thank them." He smiled wearily when she shoved against him. "Mmmm, come 'ere, I could use something soft to lie on," he gently pushed her back into the pillows of the sofa, and cushioned his head between her breasts. "My favorite," he mumbled, and cupped one with his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. When she hissed as though in pain, he quickly let go, "Are you hurt?"

"No, I think I over did it the other day when James and I were working out. Chest has been a bit sore for a few days," she replied, lightly rubbing a hand over her breasts. She grimaced as she got a whiff of her self, "I could also use a shower." She stood and tossed her shirt over his face as she sauntered off to the bathroom. "So could you," she called. He pulled the shirt off and watched the sway of her hips before he jumped up to follow her.

Later, she lay with her head pillowed in Kaidan's lap, as he gently combed his fingers through her hair. She was fighting a losing battle with the exhaustion that had been clawing at her all day, swept up in the feel of his gentle fingers on her scalp. "Do you – do you ever think about the future? About when all of this is behind us?" Kaidan asked softly.

"Uh-oh, where is this going, Alenko?" she teased, and shoved the sleepiness she had been battling aside.

"I just want to know what your plans are. When this is over."

She sat up, and moved to straddle his lap, "Told you, we're going some place tropical and…"

"Shepard, you know what I'm trying to say!" Kaidan mumbled.

"I know," She replied softly. She twined her arms behind his neck, and pressed her forehead to his. "I want to stay with you, through whatever life throws at us."

"Okay."

Shepard decided to stop by the Citadel on the return trip to the Veil. The crew was getting restless, and she had a few things she needed to drop off with various people that were currently taking up space in the shuttle bay.

She had lunch with Garrus and Tali, and they teased her about checking the time on her 'tool, and looking around for Kaidan. She grinned at them, and excused herself after she paid for their meal. She made her way the Spectre office, as she'd wanted to try out some of the new mods she's purchased for her shotgun.

To her surprise, she found Kaidan there, testing out the new M-55 Argus she's acquired for the team. "So, what do you think?"

"It's a little heavy for my tastes, and the it's not very useful at long range, and the accuracy is nowhere near as good as my Mattock. I noticed a scope you had purchased for it; so I might try that to see if it helps."

He handed it to her, and she felt the weight of it. She took aim at the target, and fired off a few rounds, frowned at the as it jerked up with each shot. "Needs a stabilizer. Recoil is bad."

"Yeah. Uh, here, I got you something." Kaidan blushed a little as he pulled a pistol off his hip and handed it over. He smiled when her eyes lit up.

"This is an M-77 Paladin! I've been itching to get my hands on one of these bad boys." She excitedly loaded the weapon, and fired a few rounds into the target. She practically vibrated with excitement. "This will make a huge difference in the field."

Kaidan chuckled, "I have a vested interest in keeping you safe." He gathered her up for a kiss, right there on the firing range. He took a slight step back, and considered her for a few minutes. "I have a few pointers for you, some things I was working on with my students. If you're interested?"

"Sure, I'm game," she replied, curious. "As I told Garrus, most people that have seen me in action seemed impressed."

"Most of them are dead, so they don't count," he chuckled, and reset the targets on the range. "Ok, stand here. I've noticed that you primarily use your shotgun, which I'm not going to touch, you are much more proficient with it than me. But, I think we can get you even more deadly with the pistol," he said, indicating the pistol in her hand. He stood behind her, and positioned her to stand perpendicular to the target. He pulled her shoulders back flush against his chest, snugged her hips against his own.

"Are you trying to seduce me or teach me, Major?" she murmured, her face flushing red.

"One and then the other, Commander," he brought her left arm up to aim at the target, and grabbed her right hand and made a fist, felt her shiver as the dark energy glowed over his own hand, and she followed his example, gathering the energy for a warp field. "Now, exhale and…" she fired off a few rounds, and simultaneously threw the glowing ball of energy forward, shredding the paper target. "Not bad, Shepard, but that target was already suppressed," he grinned, and leaned his head forward to allow his lips to caress the curve of her shoulder.

"Right, but now he's suppressed and dead." She retorted with a breathless laugh.

"But you've left two other guys that could take shots at you," he sniggered when she quickly dispatched the other two targets with two well-placed headshots.

"Dead now," she flicked the safety on and whirled around to face him. "I hope that isn't your preferred method of teaching with your students. Particularly of the female variety."

"Hmm, no, just you," he grinned, resting his hands on her shoulders.

"Good, I would hate to have to hunt the little hussies down," she muttered, and grabbed him for a searing kiss. They were interrupted by the sound of a clearing throat. They turned their heads toward the sound to find Jondum Bau standing in the doorway, a thoughtful scowl on his face.

"This is…unexpected. Apologies, humans."

"Sorry, Bau." Shepard and Kaidan untangled themselves from each other, and stood shoulder to shoulder, "Bau, this is Spectre Kaidan Alenko. Kaidan, Jondum Bau, I assisted him with a matter a few weeks ago."

"Yes, yes. Congratulations, Alenko. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to use the range."

Kaidan stifled a chuckle, "Thanks Bau, we'll get out of your way." They exited the range, and as soon as the door snicked shut behind them, both doubled over with laughter. She slumped against him, clutching her stomach as she struggled to draw a deep breath. He looked up at her as she wiped tears from her eyes. "No doubt he believes we are consummate professionals."

She grinned at him, "Race you to the elevator!" she let out a whoop as she grabbed his arm, flipped him to the floor, and took off sprinting towards the door.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: So the dastardly plot bunny struck again, and made me take this a different way that I had initially planned. However, I had fun writing this one. Also, Altie92: you asked for a commanding Commander, here you go :)_

* * *

><p>"Hey, James. What are you up to?" Shepard found the Lieutenant cracking eggs into a pan, alongside some chunky red sauce that smelled amazing.<p>

"Making some of my abuelas huevos rancheros," he grinned when he heard her stomach rumble. "You want some, Lola?" He handed her a plate.

"Thanks, James," sat down at the table with him and dug in, "Where did you learn to cook?"

"Ah, I never really learned, really. Just a hobby I suppose. Not like my abuelas, but better than what we usually have."

"Yeah, whoever came up with the idea to rotate the duty roster for that was an idiot. No one on this damn boat seems to be able to cook," she grumbled.

James wisely stayed silent, as it had been her idea. "Don't be too hard on Westmoreland, Commander. I'm pretty sure she doesn't have a clue."

Shepard gave a happy sigh, and pushed back from the table. "Best meal I've had since that steak sandwich on the Citadel." She gave James a smacking kiss on the cheek, and deposited her plate in the sink. "I have some reports to finish," she said, and headed toward the elevator.

"Is that what they call it these days?" James asked suggestively, "That was weird," he muttered to himself, and looked up to find Joker limping towards him. "Hey, man."

Joker nodded, "You coming to join us?"

James stood and put his plate away, "Let's go. I still think this is a bad idea. She's going to kill us when she finds out. Because she will find out."

Joker laughed, and limped towards the lounge. They found almost the entire crew waiting for them in there. "All right, it's time we get down to business. It occurs to me that we are letting a very lucrative opportunity pass us by."

"All right, Joker, what is this about?" Garrus grumbled from his spot next to Tali.

"As I am sure you are all aware, there is a rumor going around that the Commander is…" he trailed off, and waggled is fingers awkwardly in front of his stomach.

"Pregnant?" Liara supplied helpfully.

Joker flushed, "Yeah, that. Anyway, we need to start a baby pool. I had you all come here so we could place our bets." Joker's eyes glinted wickedly. "EDI, some help?"

"Certainly, Jeff," she replied, and she brought out up a holographic board with everyone's names listed on it.

Joker rubbed his hands together, "Who wants to go first?" He looked around the room at each person sitting there, waiting for them to speak. "I bet Alenko figures it out before she does."

"What? No," Garrus scoffed, "The Commander is a smart woman, she'll figure it out first." He glanced at the board as his and Joker's bets went up in columns beside their names. "What am I getting myself into?" he groaned, and dropped his face into his hands.

"I don't know, Garrus, I agree with Joker on this one, Shepard is too busy taking care of everyone else's problems to think about herself," Tali said.

"I dunno, I'm having my doubts," James said, "She ate a whole plate of my granny's huevos rancheros and liked it. According to family legend, no pregnant woman has ever been able to do that."

"She also drank a krogan under the table, and she can handle shots of ryncol. She has an iron stomach," Garrus said.

"Can't we just settle this and have EDI scan her again?" Gabby asked.

"I will not. I have decided that I will not violate Shepard's privacy any more than necessary," EDI informed them primly.

"I place the odds at 68.992% that the Commander is pregnant and improving every day." Legion said, head flaps flaring.

"Uhh…okay," Joker frowned at the geth. "Moving on. How much longer till they find out?"

"Assuming she is, at least three more weeks," Cortez said softly from the bar.

"I doubt it will be that long, surely not even Shepard is that unaware of the workings her own body," Liara spoke up softly.

"Aye, I think she is," Ken chuckled. "I think the Major will notice any differences in that fine, fine form of hers long before she does."

"You're disgusting," Gabby grumbled. The group laughed, and began making their bets in earnest. They covered everything, from how long until the potential parents got a clue, to gender, due dates, actual birth dates, and so on.

"I have one question, has anyone actually seen anything that would make them believe Shepard is actually pregnant, aside from what EDI told you weeks ago?" Liara asked.

"Ah…No, actually." Garrus said after a brief silence.

"Okay, here's what we're going to do. Anyone sees anything that might be a sign, make a note of it, to let the rest of us know. EDI, can you send us a list of stuff to look out for, for the non-humans? And will you keep track of it for us?" Joker said.

"Jeff, you should know that I cannot participate as I am privy to far more of Shepard's private life than you are. It would be…unfair."

"Yeah, EDI. I figured," Joker said, "Also, no one can tell Shepard or Alenko what we suspect, unless her life depends on it, or your credits are forfeit. Does everyone agree?"

* * *

><p>"I don't understand, how is this too small?" Shepard grumbled to herself, as she fumbled with the latch on her chest guard. It was just barely unable to snap shut. She growled in frustration, and tossed the offending item across the room.<p>

"Shepard, what's going on?" Kaidan asked as he walked up to her, already clad in his armor, the chest guard in question in his hands.

"Something's wrong with my chest guard, I can't get it to snap closed," she said in frustration.

"Shepard, it's too small." Kaidan said as he tried to assist her, one palm firmly pressed over one breast; the other pushed the sides to meet from the back.

"It's not too small! It fit just fine last week," she hissed, "What are you staring at, Lieutenant?" she growled at James, who was watching the exchange with interest from his post by the weapon bench. He was rather enjoying watching the Major fondle the Commander in an attempt to finish suiting her up.

James just shook his head and shrugged, and Kaidan suppressed a chuckle when he saw James mouth "moody," and bent his head over his omni-tool to type something in.

"There, good to go, Commander," he told her as they won the fight with her chest guard. "Are you sure that's comfortable?"

She nodded her head as she took a few experimental breaths. "It's fine," she grunted. "Let's get this over with."

* * *

><p>Kaidan and James accompanied Legion and Shepard to the geth fighter base following the too-small-armor snafu. "Ah, Shepard, is it really the best idea for you to do this?" James asked, the concern evident on his face. "Legion, could Kaidan or I could do it instead? The Major was there on Eden Prime when they first encountered the heretic geth." Shepard didn't miss the significant look James shot at the geth.<p>

She was a little confused, as Legion seemed to stare at her for several long moments, head flaps flaring as he completed a scan of her. "No, it must be Shepard-Commander. You have perspective they lack," he explained. "Do not worry, we have improved the process Cerberus used for Project Overlord. It is safe and will not cause undue stress."

"I'm not worried about a little stress. All right, lets do this," she told Legion, and shook her head sharply at James, who appeared ready to protest again "Enough, Lieutenant." She glanced at Kaidan, who had been standing by silently, but from the clenching and unclenching of his jaw, she knew he also wanted to protest.

He grasped her arm, and pulled her to the side as Legion worked at a nearby console. "Are you sure about this? I mean, entering the geth consensus? We've done some crazy things, but…"

"I don't really have a choice, do I?" she said and laid a palm against his cheek, "I'll be fine. Watch my six, Major," she commanded with a smirk as Legion signaled for her to step into the pod.

He nodded, and forced a smile. After the door slid shut, he stalked over to Legion, "If anything happens to her, I'll decommission you myself," he threatened.

Legion appeared to study him for a moment, and flared his head flaps. "We will not allow anything to happen to them, Alenko-Major."

Kaidan didn't notice as James blanched behind him, as he puzzled over Legion's choice of words, but in the end chalked it up to the eccentric way the geth spoke. He simply unclipped his assault rifle, and clicked the safety off and stood menacingly behind Legion.

He and James waited for what seemed to be hours, but in actuality was about thirty minutes. He was standing by when Shepard took a shaky step out of the pod, and grasped her arm to steady her when she stumbled. "Hey, you okay?"

She waved off his concern, "I'm fine, just a little dizzy. It's disorientating when you come out of that thing." She grinned up at Kaidan, and her blue eyes twinkled at him.

"Shepard, I recommend you eat an energy bar, your blood sugar has dropped, which would explain your dizziness," EDI informed her over the comm.

"Ah, thank you, EDI," Shepard replied, and took the bar Kaidan had produced from one of the pouches strapped about his midsection. "What else do you have in there?" she asked curiously.

"Ammo, grenades, medigel, the usual. Vega tried to get me to carry some kittens with me, but it never seems to work out."

"Kittens, Vega?" she snickered.

"They're just so cute and cuddly, ma'am." James answered easily, and one corner of his mouth twitched upwards. "Hey, Lola, what're you wearing under that suit?" he asked as they made their way back to the shuttle, "It's been driving me crazy all day."

"Well, I guess I could tell you," she leaned into him and whispered something in his ear. He leaned back and let out a low whistle, "That's not standard Alliance issue. Hot damn, Lola." He glanced at Kaidan as the older Marine glared at him, and a blushed suffused across his cheeks, and took a few hearty steps away from her. "Have fun with that, sir."

"That is the plan," she smirked, and let her gaze fall on Kaidan, who raised an eyebrow.

* * *

><p>As the shuttle docked with the Normandy, and they waited for the door to open in to the shuttle bay, Kaidan stood beside Shepard and leaned down to murmur, "So what <em>are<em> you wearing under that?" as his hot gaze raked over her.

"You know, just a thing," she demurred, her gaze fixed firmly on the door.

Kaidan cleared his throat, "What _thing_? Have I seen it before?"

She tilted her head in his direction, and peeked at him from beneath her lashes, "I don't believe you've seen this particular _thing_." She grinned when he swallowed. Hard. "Would you like to?"

He nodded.

Her tongue flitted across her lips, moistening them as it went. "I suggest you get me somewhere alone, then," she murmured back to him, and smirked as she heard James shifting uncomfortably behind her, and knew he was looking everywhere but at the two of them. She stood side by side with Kaidan, her hip and shoulder brushing his, and even through the armor, she felt the contact as sure as her skin was bare.

When the door opened, Shepard strode toward the elevator without a backward glance, knowing instinctively that Kaidan was one step behind her, always on her six. She knew he would warn anyone off that was planning to take the elevator to another deck at that particular moment, and she was right. As soon as the doors slid shut, she grabbed him by his chest plate, and slammed him against the wall. Her hands quickly found the release for his chest guard, and she peeled it from him and tossed it in the corner. With the skill of a professional soldier, she soon had him backed into a corner wearing only the thin, loose pants he wore under his armor.

"Uh, Shepard, elevator?" Kaidan mumbled against her lips as they met with bruising force.

"Don't care," she tilted her head, and angled her lips to meet his, devouring his lips. "You're the tech wiz, take care of it," she commanded, barely noticing as he complied and peeled her out of her own armor.

He pulled the thin top off, and gritted his teeth at what he found. She was wearing a lacy green concoction that displayed her breast, and ran down to spread across her hips, leaving her waist bare except for a thin swatch of lace down the center of her belly. "No wonder Vega blushed," he growled, taking in the defiant slant of her head as she watched him.

"Take me now," she demanded, one hand fisted in his hair, and he circled her waist with one arm; the other cupping a breast, tweaking the nipple, drawing a moan from her.

"With pleasure," he groaned, and gripped her hips, reversing their positions and driving home within her. They both sighed their enjoyment of the act, and she wrapped her legs around his waist. His lips found her throat when she tossed her head back on a moan, and she cried out as he thrust in to her. She moaned as she bowed her back, her fingernails biting into his back. "Oh God, Celia," he grunted against her throat. She cried out as he thrust in to her, and jerked his head to her, and sealed her lips to his. He grunted her name as her muscles clenched him, and they tumbled into sweet ecstasy together.

They slumped against the wall, "Love it when you start giving orders," he murmured against her skin. "Beautiful. And sexy."

She smiled lazily, "Take me to bed, Major," she whispered demandingly.

* * *

><p>Liara and Joker stood surveying the random articles of clothing and armor currently littering the elevator and Liara daintily sniffed the air. "I thought human women generally had no interest in intercourse during the first few months they were expecting. Or is my information incorrect?"<p>

"We don't know for certain if she is or not," Joker retorted, blushing a deep red.

"Hmmm."


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: I cried as I wrote this. So much fluffy goodness._

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><p>Shepard and Kaidan sat in the Loft, cleaning and oiling their weapons. Neither spoke, content to just be together, each lost in their own thoughts. Today was the three-year anniversary since Virmire. While both were past the guilt they'd felt, neither really knew what to say at any rate.<p>

Kaidan glanced up as she finished assembling her new Paladin, and pulled back the slide with a click. "It's sticking," she grumbled. He watched in fascination as she quickly disassembled the weapon and put it back together again. With a shake of her head, she repeated the process two more times before she leaned back in her seat, satisfied with the end result.

"Wanna do mine?" he asked, gesturing to the pieces of his assault rifle laying on the coffee table. He looked up at her, and saw her watching him; a soft, half-smile on her lips, her face lit with a glow he couldn't define. He swallowed when his eyes met hers, and for probably the first time, he could clearly read exactly what was written in that gaze.

"I love you, Kaidan. I know I don't say it often enough, but I do," she leaned forward, laid a palm against his chest. She brushed her lips over his cheek, "Endlessly," she breathed, as he wrapped strong arms around her waist and pulled her into his lap.

"There are so many things I want to do with you, Shepard." He tilted his head forward to rest against her shoulder. "I want to take you dancing," he murmured against her collarbone. "And not in a club, real dancing, like waltzing, I suppose." She smiled, and cupped his cheek in her palm as he continued on. "I want to take you to meet my mother, I want to pick apples with you in the fall. I want to swim in English Bay with you in the summer, and drink beer on my parent's balcony. I want to go to the cottage I have on the Sunshine Coast, and turn off our communicators and get lost in each other for days." He watched her as she searched his face, held her gaze when her eyes came back to his, "And one day, I want to marry you, Celia," he whispered, as he lifted one of her palms and pressed a kiss to the center of it.

"Is that a proposal, Kaidan?" she murmured, that same soft smile still gracing her lips.

"Only if you want it to be," he shifted to his left, and dug a hand into a pocket. He blushed a little as he pulled something out, "I've carried this around for almost three years now." He opened his hand, and she found a simple, yet beautiful, ring, set with a sapphire that she knew matched the color of her eyes, with two smaller diamonds on either side. "It's yours when you want it," he said gruffly, hardly trusting his voice. "I, uh, it was my great-great grandmother's. My mom gave it to me when I was on shore leave after the Battle of the Citadel, and you were stuck playing politics. There was just never the right moment and then you were gone," he choked out, a little embarrassed.

Shepard sat there, stunned, not sure what the right words were in such a situation. "Kaidan, I…"

"You don't have to say anything. I didn't actually intend on doing this now. It just felt…right," he breathed against her lips, before capturing them for a passionate kiss. "But you know I won't take no for an answer, right?" he said as they pulled apart. He fished out her dog tags that were always around her neck, and undid the clasp, slipped the ring down the chain to hang between her breasts. "I think you should hang on to this now," he rasped, his throat thick with emotion. "You can put it on when you're ready."

"I wouldn't know the first thing about being a wife." She said the only thing that came to mind, and frowned when she thought about how much it sounded like an excuse.

Kaidan chuckled, "And I don't know the first thing about being a husband, especially to the famous Commander Shepard. That doesn't matter though, as long as we're together. If you want to stay on active duty after all this," he gestured with one arm, "Then I'll stay on active duty with you. If you want to retire, and have six kids, I'll do that with you," he laughed as her eyes went wide, and he saw the slight edge of panic in them for the first time. "If you want to run away, and hide from the rest of the galaxy for the rest of our lives, I'll run with you. Just as long as I'm with you, Celia."

She blinked away the tears she was suspiciously certain were forming in her eyes, and leaned forward, pressed her lips to his as his hands grasped her waist and pulled her closer. "I love you," she whispered again, her lips whispering against his cheek.

* * *

><p>That night, as she lay sprawled across his torso, her fingers gently playing with his salt and pepper curls, she listened to his soft snores as he slept. A small smile played across her lips as she watched him thoughtfully, thinking about all of those things he wanted for their life together, all of the things she knew might never happen. Her smile slowly fell into a frown, as she thought about the days ahead. Her eyes fluttered closed as sleep slowly claimed her, her only thought was of how much she wanted to say yes.<p> 


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: I was inspired for the Javik and Kaidan portion by a drabble I saw on tumblr, and now, for the life of me, I can't find it! If it's yours, or you know the author, please let me know, as I'd like to credit you for the inspiration! As always, thank you for the reviews and alerts and favorites! Enjoy!_

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><p>"You know what I miss?" Shepard asked lazily, lightly trailing her hand over his chest and abdomen. They were both still naked and sweaty from their recent lovemaking.<p>

"Hmmm?" he mumbled unintelligibly, and skimmed a hand from the curve of her breast to the swell of her hip.

"Hockey," she smiled, and scooted up so her face was level with his. She dropped a kiss to his lips, and he gave her a lazy, half smile as his heart skipped a beat.

"Hockey? I had no idea you liked hockey. Who's you're favorite team?" he asked, stroking her arm as she lay next to him.

"Oh, I don't have a team, per say. I just like watching the sport. When I was completing N-training classes, it was how we would spend one of our rare nights off relaxing. We'd find a bar, and share a beer while watching whatever game was on that night. The best things were the fights," she sighed, and smiled a little, lost in the memory. "We would lay bets, depending on who was playing, on the number of fights," she looked down at him as he tightened the arm around her and drew her to lie across his chest.

"Who won?" he asked sleepily.

"Oh, I did. Every time," she looked down at him as his eyes drifted shut.

"I love a good hockey game," he said, surprisingly lucid. "I play a few seasons as a kid. Broke my nose once, and Mom wouldn't let me play any more after that. I wasn't very good," he drawled, and in one smooth movement, wrapped her in his arms and rolled so she lay beneath him. "I don't get it," he said softly.

"Get what?" she squirmed beneath him, arching her hips against his fast stiffening arousal. She bit her lip as she looked up at him through her long lashes, and felt liquid heat pooling in her belly.

"How talking about hockey can get me going again," he lowered his lips to the column of her throat, savoring the salty taste of her skin, the feel of her curves pressing against his chest.

"Are you sure it was talking about hockey?" she whispered in his ear, her hands sliding over his back to grip his behind. "It's you, always you," she sighed, and pressed her lips to his, the kiss hot and wet, and she felt her heart race.

"Mmm," he groaned, and ducked his head to her breast. She arched her back off the bed as his tongue swirled over one nipple, his thumb brushing over the other as his filled his hand with her breast.

He looked up at her as she ran her fingers through his hair, and cradled the back of his head, her fingers stroking the back of his neck. A slow, sexy smile curved his lips, "I love you, Shepard." He captured her lips in an sensual openmouthed kiss, stealing her breath away. He nearly groaned as he felt her reach between them to stroke his swollen erection. Her fingers danced over him as he probed her sweet mouth with his tongue. "Waste no time," he half chuckled, half groaned as she guided to her hot center, and ever so slowly, thrust into her. He buried his face in her shoulder as her strong muscles clamped down on him, urged him further into her glorious heat.

She dug her heels into the mattress, tried to urge him to a faster pace. He smiled into her throat, and ran a hand from the curve of her hip, over her muscled thigh, to rest behind her knee, urged her to wrap the long limb around his waist. She complied, and moaned as she was rewarded by his mouth on her breast. "Kaidan," she managed on a strangled moan, panting as he thrust into her in a slow and sexy rhythm. She felt his teeth scraping at her ear, his breath hot and heady. "Oh," she sighed as he surprised her, and rolled them, ended with her lying sprawled across his chest. She pushed against him to get leverage to sit up, breasts jutting out proudly, long brown hair tumbling down around her. He gripped her hips and using strong hands, began directing her movements. She rode him. Elicited strangled groans and half gasps as he panted beneath her. She altered her pace, started fast, almost frantic, moved to slow and sensual, leaned over him to brush her breasts against his chest. She laughed in delight as a faint blue aura covered his skin, felt the build up of dark energy in his hands as he reached between them to fondle the sensitive nub between her thighs. He heard her intake of breath, felt her wet inner muscles clamp down, sliding over him as she climaxed.

"Yes," she murmured, her own corona of dark energy flickered over her skin, joining his. He gripped her hips, and pumped his own up to meet hers, sliding into her at a frenzied pace, heard her gasp his name as his own strangled shout mingled with hers. The blue aura surrounding them dissipated harmlessly as they reached the pinnacle of glorious pleasure.

He wrapped his strong arms around her as she slumped against his chest. "Mmm, you are amazing, _mon coeur."_ He murmured into her hair, breathing in the scent of her, she smelt of sweat and Alliance issue soap, coffee and just a hint of vanilla.

"French, Kaidan?" she asked softly, her fingers brushing lightly over his face.

"Yeah, uh, my mom was raised in Quebec She made sure I knew her family's language, too," he explained, his hands drifting softly over her back, rubbing lightly.

"It sounds sexy when you say it," she whispered, dropping a kiss to his lips.

"_Mon coeur_, my heart," he repeated, tapping her lightly on the nose. "You are just that. Always." He smiled in blessed contentment as she buried her face in his chest, curled one hand over his shoulder as she drifted into exhausted sleep, held in the strong arms of her lover.

* * *

><p>Kaidan was in the mess drinking his morning cup of coffee with Garrus and Liara. Shepard was slow to wake that morning, and he'd left her in the shower after she'd promised to be down shortly.<p>

"Do you think we're heading back to Rannoch, soon?" Liara asked, as she held the warm ceramic close to her face, and inhaled the scent of the coffee.

"In a day or so. Shepard wants to finish scanning this system before we move on." Kaidan sat back in his chair, thinking as he sipped his coffee. "I see we've made a convert of you, Liara. You used to turn your nose up at the stuff."

"Oh, it's awful. But the smell is divine, and addictive properties of the caffeine make it difficult to start the day without it," Liara smiled, took a sip from her mug. "It also helps to break the ice with the human crew not used to serving on a ship with aliens." She raised her mug at Private Campbell, who was leaning against the center island drinking her own mug of coffee, hesitant to join her superior officer and the aliens. Campbell smiled and raised her own mug in acknowledgement before she wandered off.

"That it does," Kaidan murmured, before he lapsed into silence again. He mentally planned out his day, and the reports he needed to finish. He blinked in surprise when he found Javik seated across from him, the Prothean staring at him steadily as each eye blinked independently. "Umm…"

"You are joined with the Commander," Javik stated, and gave a perfunctory nod.

"I…"

"Have you joined with the Commander for the purpose of procreating to provide more soldiers for the war? I approve. I must ask, what is the gestation period for humans? Additionally, how long before your offspring would be able to join in the fight?"

Kaidan could only sit there, blinking at the Prothean, unsure of what to say or how to say it. He cleared his throat, and unable to find his voice, cleared it again. He glanced around the table, and found Garrus' and Liara's stares boring in to him. "Um. What?" he said lamely.

Javik's frown deepened. "I will not repeat myself, human. I approve of you as a mate for the Commander. You are both strong biotics, and powerful warriors. You have leadership abilities many of your primitive kind lack. Your offspring would be a powerful addition to the fight ahead."

"Um. Thanks. I think." Kaidan sipped his coffee, considering how to answer his questions. He chose to ignore the first question, and moved on to answer the second and third, "Humans take a while to…gestate. Around nine months. And then it would take about eighteen to twenty years before they could, uh, join the fight. Assuming they wanted to. We don't really force anyone to fight for us."

"In my time, everyone fought. It was punishable by death in the Empire if you refused."

"That's why I'm a little glad your kind was dead and gone by the time we came around," Kaidan heard Garrus mutter into his own turian coffee. He suppressed a snicker as Liara glared at the turian.

"It does not appear the humans procreate efficiently. I will have to rethink the matter." Javik stood and made to leave. Kaidan's soft voice at his back stopped him.

"Humans don't always 'join' to procreate. They do it for the pleasure they get from the act, as well as the sense of camaraderie and companionship, that comes from the union. It creates…hope."

"In my time, we initiated physical congress for the purpose of procreation only. To do otherwise was punishable by death." Javik stated.

"Then I feel deeply sorry for your people," Kaidan said, and watched as the Prothean walked away.

He was puzzled when, as Shepard walked into the mess, Javik stopped in front of her, and pressed a finger to the middle of her forehead, and closed his eyes. "I approve," he stated simply moments later, and moved out of her way and continued on.

"Uh, what was that about?" Shepard asked as she poured herself a mug of coffee, and moved to sit beside Kaidan.

"The Major and Javik were debating the merits of sex," Garrus stated, barely keeping a straight face. His eyes darted across to meet Liara's, and with a snort, they both burst into hysterical laughter.

"Did I miss the joke?" she asked, eyebrow raised at the other two.

"Javik…approves…of our union." Kaidan said, shiftly uncomfortably in his chair. He glanced up as James walked toward them, a smirk on his face, listened as Liara gasped out the conversation she'd just witnessed between bouts of laughter.

"Sounds like Javik needs to get laid, eh, Lola?" James said as he sat down across from her.

"Too much information, James," she said, bringing up her hands as though to fend him off. "I guess it's nice that Javik approves. It's just a little creepy." Kaidan wisely said nothing.

* * *

><p>"Major, I have some concerns about Shepard," EDI informed him as he sat in starboard observation looking over some reports.<p>

"What is it, EDI?" he asked, his forehead crinkled with concern.

"If she were to find out I have told you, she would kill me, in all likelihood. I ask for your discretion," she said, her tone concerned.

"Sure, EDI, now tell me what your concerns are?" Kaidan asked, impatience evident in his voice.

"Very well. In the last twenty-one days, Shepard has had ten instances of nausea, three of which have resulted in vomiting. I do not believe this in normal. She has forbidden me to inform Dr. Chakwas, however."

He frowned, clearly this was an ongoing issue, and EDI was correct to be concerned. "Um, when has Shepard vomited?" he asked, wrinkling his nose in disgust.

"She is currently in the act of being sick. She was also ill three and five days ago."

"Thanks, EDI. I'll take care of her." He stood and walked the short distance to the small kitchen, and reheated some soup Traynor had made the day before. He added some crackers to the tray, and a couple cold bottles of water. He found Shepard draped over the toilet in her bathroom, her face pale and sweaty; her hair loose around her shoulders; her skin clammy. He set the tray on her desk, wet a washcloth with cool water, and wiped her face.

"Hey," she mumbled weakly, barely lifting her face as another wave of nausea hit her with a groan.

"Hey," he replied, wiping the strands of hair sticking to her face away. With a frown, he pulled her hair back into a ponytail. "I brought you some soup."

She grimaced, "Who made it?"

"Traynor did. Interested?"

"In Traynor, or the soup?" she joked lamely.

He smiled as her color was starting to come back, "The soup, you're mine already."

"Yeah, yeah," she grumbled as she braced herself and clumsily stood and walked shakily by Kaidan to take a seat at her desk. "Smells good," she said, and took a tentative taste. In minutes, the soup and crackers were gone, and she sighed, satisfied. "So, who told you?"

"EDI, she was worried about you. Don't hurt her, she was right to worry," he added when she started to grumble. "You know, it's counterintuitive, but if we don't get enough to eat, sometimes our biotics can make us sick. I checked; you haven't been eating your full rations."

"I haven't been hungry," she pulled her feet up and tucked them beneath her, hugged her knees. "Besides, we don't have a cook, and everyone but Traynor and James suck at it, and they both have jobs to do."

"I'm sure Traynor would take on extra rotations, she enjoys it. And you've never needed a glorified secretary before," he teased.

"I guess you're right," she glanced at the empty bowl and back at him.

He chuckled, "I'll go get you some more in a minute."

"Thanks," she grinned.

He leaned thoughtfully against the desk, studying her. "Is it the nightmares?" he asked softly.

"You don't miss a trick, do you?" she scowled a little. "Maybe," she sighed. "It's definitely worse after I have one. They aren't as bad when you're with me, though."

He smiled, "That's every night."

"Well, yeah, but some nights you come to bed really late, or have to get up early. That's when they're worse."

"Oh," he said, and felt a little guilty.

"It's not your fault, you have a job to do," she said, and stood, leaned against him, sighed as his arms snuck around waist to hold her.

"You know, there could be another explanation," he glanced down at her.

"Hmm, what?" she murmured into his chest.

"You could be pregnant."

"What? No, not possible," she scoffed.

"Are you sure? It's not like we haven't been doing everything in our power to get you that way."

"Of course, it isn't possible." She said firmly, as though by sheer will alone she could make it so.

"If you say so," he said skeptically, making a mental note to keep an eye on her, and gently rubbed her back. "Don't you want kids?"

"Yeah, one day. But right now would kind of be a shitty time to have any, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I guess it would. I better go get you more of that soup before the vultures take it all. Talk to Traynor, okay? Or I will." He dropped lingering kiss to her lips, resisting the urge to draw her close and take her back to bed.

"All right, I'll talk to her right now."


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>Shepard slipped out Kaidan's arms as he slept a few days later, and watched him contentedly as he snuffled in his sleep and wrapped his arm around her pillow and pulled it close to him. Shaking the urge to crawl back into bed with him, she quickly dressed and took the elevator to the crew deck. She found Liara and Garrus drinking coffee, turian for him, human for her. She helped herself to a cup, and grimaced at the unidentifiable grey slop on the plate the crewmember doing the cooking passed her. It appeared to be an attempt at eggs and ridiculously limp bacon, but she couldn't be certain. She sighed, and sat down next to Garrus.<p>

"So, Shepard, where have you been hiding the past few days," Garrus asked, watching as she pushed the grey globs around on her plate.

"Ugh, I wasn't feeling well, so Kaidan made me take it easy. Of course, this slop isn't making me feel any better," she grumbled and pushed her plate away.

James rounded the corner, "When you say he made you, do you mean he tied you up and forced you to stay put? Kinky, Lola," he shot her a wink.

She scowled at him, "No, Lieutenant, that is not what I mean."

Liara shoved Shepard's plate back towards her, "You need to eat, Shepard. Think of…"

"Your biotics," Garrus interrupted, glowering at Liara. "We're heading down to Rannoch today, right? So eat up. You know, I think the turian food we have is better than that crap."

"You're probably right, too bad it could cause anaphylactic shock if I tried it." Shepard sighed, and proceeded to clear her plate, remembering the promise she had made Kaidan. "Garrus, I need to see you in the armory a little later. I picked up a scope mod for your rifle I thought might interest you." She stood and dropped off her dirty dishes, topped off her coffee and headed to the war room.

She found it hard to concentrate, however, and knew that she didn't really have any other excuses to put off the final mission on Rannoch. She had a bad feeling in the pit of her gut, and was dreading going down there. She rolled her shoulders, and told Tali to grab her gear and meet her in the shuttle bay. She found Kaidan in the starboard observatory, looking over a report the turian counselor had requested.

He looked up when she walked in, "Hey there."

"Hey Kaidan, just checking in," she wandered over to him, and smiling, straddled his lap.

"I'm glad. Say, you left without waking me," he murmured as he nuzzled her neck, placed his hands at her hips to draw her closer. He tugged at her shirt, untucking it at the sides so he could feel the soft flesh beneath.

She shivered and leaned in to him, "I didn't have the heart."

He chuckled huskily, "Well, thanks, but next time, ah… wake me." He captured her lips in a bruising kiss. "So, why are you really here?" he asked, voice husky, as he took the half full mug of coffee from her and took a sip. Grimaced. "It's cold."

"Is it? Oh," she replied distractedly.

"Shepard, what's going on?" Kaidan looked at her with concern, and rubbed her back in long, soothing strokes.

"I just can't shake this feeling something terrible is going to happen on Rannoch. I, I almost want you to stay here, but I think you'd follow me anyway," she turned her face into his shoulder and smiled at how right it felt.

"Damn straight, I would. Hey, everything will be fine. Okay?"

She paused and studied his face for a moment, "Yeah, okay. Lets go suit up and meet up with Tali."

* * *

><p>Kaidan was puzzled about the behavior of the rest of the squad. Each and every one of them had been much protective of Shepard, and had been for weeks. They weren't exactly hampering her on the field, but he knew she was getting frustrated with them all. While he was more protective by virtue of his personality, he also didn't get in her way. He didn't like it that she took risks, particularly her seemingly reckless combat style, but he agreed that they were her risks to take. Plus, her recklessness complimented his more methodical style, and it felt good to be at her back again. He hadn't argued, much, when she merged with the geth consciousness. He'd been curious when he saw Garrus push her back into cover when she'd popped up to charge across the field. Even Tali had made a comment that afternoon while they were on Rannoch, and had frantically tried to get Kaidan to keep her from taking on the Reaper one on one.<p>

He was a tad alarmed, however, when he came up to their cabin that night and found her sobbing over the plaque with Legion's name on it.

"Hey, hey, hey," he mumbled, and pulled her into an embrace. "What's going on?"

"I, I, huh –," she hiccupped into his shoulder, and didn't protest as he gathered her up and walked the few short steps to the bathroom and set her down on the counter. He grabbed a washcloth and dampened it with cool water before using it to wipe her blotchy face. "Thanks," she whispered when her breathing had calmed and she could speak again. "You're always so sweet to me, so understanding," she sighed, and to his absolute horror, her eyes watered up again and she started sobbing inconsolably.

Kaidan frantically thought back over his interactions with her for the last few days. There had been no mention of his mother, her mother, Cerberus or her association thereof, no mention of Horizon and the massive ass he'd made of himself. He was truly confused, and a touch panicked, as to why she was crying now, over the geth, when, to his knowledge, she hadn't reacted similarly when Mordin and Thane had died. "Sweetheart, what's wrong? Did I do something? Is it Legion's sacrifice? Please, tell me," he practically begged.

"I don't know!" she wailed, and attempted several deep breaths to calm herself. "I – I just can't seem to sto-o-o-p!" she hiccupped, and her sobs turned into breathless snuffles as she buried her head against his chest. Kaidan responded the only way he knew how, and just held her close, there in the small bathroom, and waited as she cried herself out, and her breathing calmed and evened out as she dropped into a tired sleep.

"Oh Celia," he sighed, carefully lifted her, and carried her to the bed. "You're so busy taking care of everyone else, you forget to take care of yourself." He brushed a hand over her cheek, and pulled the quilt up to her chin. He straightened up, and went back to the desk, picked up Legion's plaque, and exited the cabin, called softly for EDI to dim the lights.

He found Garrus in the lounge, staring into the bottom of a glass of turian brandy. "Hey Garrus, I hope you're finding the answers you're looking for in that glass."

"Kaidan, good to see you. I think James left a bottle of that foul smelling human liquor, tequila, I think it was, behind the bar," Garrus raised his glass to Kaidan, and took a sip. "This damn war. How is Shepard holding up? She looked pretty torn up earlier."

Kaidan pulled out a bottle of whiskey he'd hidden in a cabinet. He poured himself a few fingers of the amber liquid and sighed, rubbed the cool glass to his temples as he thought about his next words. "I just went up to check on her, and found her damn near inconsolable over this." He tossed Garrus the plaque he had tucked into a pocket. "She's sleeping now."

Garrus studied the name thoughtfully for a few minutes. "You know, she has a way of making everyone work together, to get us all to see the bigger picture, and what we're really fighting for. It was pretty strange having an active geth on the ship when she first activated him. When you consider the amount of time and effort we spent fighting them three years ago. But she made us see the advantages. She convinced Tali and Legion to work together peacefully. Hell of a thing, getting the geth and the quarians to make peace." Garrus set his glass on the table in front of him, "I'll be right back, I'll, uh, put this up for her."

Kaidan nodded, and took a sip of his whiskey, felt the cool liquid warm his belly. He looked up as Garrus walked back in and sat down. "How do I help her, Garrus? How can I help take some of the weight off her shoulders?"

Garrus considered older man for a moment, "I think you're already doing it, Kaidan. You should have seen her before we went through the Omega-4 relay. When the Collectors boarded the ship and took the entire crew, she was frantic to get everyone back safely. She didn't let the rest of the squad know, but I could tell." He stood and walked over to stare out the window. "She is under a lot of stress right now, but she doesn't have that same edge of desperation, of hopelessness. She can still smile; hell, I even heard her laugh at something James told her the other day. You do that for her, Kaidan; you help her to relax. I don't think she ever relaxed until after we returned from the Collector base. She slept for two days," Garrus finished his thoughts as he took another sip of brandy and sat back down. "I think she knows she doesn't have to be strong all the time for you."

"Thank you for telling me that, Garrus. I know…I know I hurt her when I refused to join her crew on Horizon. Don't think I didn't see the murderous look you gave me when I did," Kaidan chuckled, and sat down across from Garrus.

"Stubborn bastard," Garrus laughed. He bent his head over his omni-tool, checking the list that EDI had sent him. Muttering to himself, he sent a message to EDI that said, 'weeping uncontrollably."

"What was that?" Kaidan asked, curious as to why whenever Shepard did something out of character, whichever crewmember was closest suddenly needed to use their 'tool for something. He lunged at Garrus, and caught a glimpse of something suspiciously like 'pool' followed by a long list he couldn't read before Garrus wiped it clean.

"Um. Nothing."

"Garrus," Kaidan narrowed his eyes, "Have you noticed anything… different… about the Commander?" he asked, watching his turian friend closely.

"Uh, no, why do you ask?" Garrus stammered uncomfortably, waiting for an opening to make his escape.

"Because I have. She hasn't had much of an appetite lately. And her chest is, um, sore, all the time," Kaidan flushed, uncomfortable to be sharing such details with someone not Shepard. "She's also been napping as often as she gets the chance. She never used to nap before. She's tired all the time, and we've been having some trouble with her armor not fitting properly. She's also been nauseated, really, really moody and she's had a few dizzy spells."

"Maybe she's, what was it I heard Campbell and Westmoreland complaining about? PMSing?" Garrus muttered, edging slowly toward the door.

_A penny in the air._

"No, she hasn't…" he trailed off, his suspicion growing, a niggling seed of doubt taking root in his mind.

_The penny drops._

"Garrus, she hasn't-" he said, realization hitting him, and paused when he glanced to see Garrus had fled the room. He heard the sound of the elevator, and frowned. "Coward," he muttered to himself. He sat down heavily as he thought about his next move, getting Shepard to submit to Dr. Chakwas for a physical.

"Major? Shepard is awake and asking for you," EDI interrupted his thoughts.

"Okay, EDI, I'll be right up," with a shake of his head, he decided not to worry about it at the moment, and just focus on Shepard.

* * *

><p>"I'm telling you, Joker. He knows!" Garrus hissed at the pilot, after telling him about his recent chat with Kaidan. "He probably saw my omni-tool, and he was asking all these questions. I know the Major, he's not a stupid man."<p>

"Yeah, but Garrus, that just means you lost that portion of the bet," Joker sniggered. "It doesn't change anything."

"We'll see if you're still saying that when they find out we've all suspected for weeks AND started a betting ring around it," Garrus said darkly before stomping off. "Because they _will_ find out."


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>"Hey, Commander." Joker greeted as she stepped into the cockpit. He was eating some leftover asari noodles Kaidan had brought back from the Citadel for him a few days ago.<p>

"You better not get my dashboard dirty, Joker," she said sternly as he stirred the noodles with his chopsticks.

"Nah, I'm good. So where to now?" Joker asked, and took a bite of his noodles. He raised an eyebrow when he saw her nostrils flare, and the slightly green cast her skin took on. "Want some, Commander?" he held out the take out box and waved it under her nose.

"Uh, no. Thanks," she replied, and turned her head and took a deep breath. "Just came to check on things. Just keep scanning this system. I should go," she turned on her heel and hurried away.

"EDI, I think that one counted," he said in hushed tones.

"I believe you are correct, Jeff. I will add it to the list."

"So what are we up to now?"

"According to James, her 'boobs' have increased in size and she is prone to sudden mood swings, in addition to nausea, fatigue, and occasional dizziness, so five. We also believe Major Alenko's suspicions have been aroused, but he has not requested Shepard report to Dr. Chakwas yet."

* * *

><p>Shepard headed down to engineering. Surely there weren't any nauseating smells down there. She'd never liked those asari noodles; the smell of them had always made her gag, it just seemed worse this time. She walked in to find Diana Allers, the media liason she had allowed on the ship against her better judgment, draped across Ken's console, her décolletage on prominent display. She raised an eyebrow, "Out," she barked at Allers, and jerked her head towards the door. She clenched her teeth when Allers batted her eyelashes at Ken and sauntered out. "One of these days, I'm going to put her in her place," she muttered.<p>

"Thanks, Commander. She was a bit of a distraction," Gabby said, scowling at Ken as he stared after the other woman.

"You know, Ken, rabid species like that carry disease," Shepard drawled, and grinned at the horrified expression on his face. "So, what is going on down here in the bowels of the ship?" she asked, and listened with half an ear as the two engineers prattled on to her about internal compensators, or some other tech jargon that was over her head. Her head jerked up when she heard Tali hiss into her communicator, "How am I supposed to know that, I'm not human, you bosh'tet."

"Everything okay, Tali?" Shepard called to the quarian from across the room.

"Um, yes, just a disagreement with Joker, she nearly stammered.

Shepard studied the quarian, confused as to why she was so twitchy. "Maybe James is right about his nickname for you," she murmured.

"Sparks? Stupid name," Tali said, relieved to change the subject. "Vega is very awkward around me, he always seems to get tongue tied."

"That's Vega for you. I don't think he's had as much contact with non-humans as the rest of the crew. Go easy on him, Tali. We'll break him in yet," Shepard chuckled as she headed towards the door. She considered stopping by to talk to Javik, but decided against it. She also briefly considered having a talk with Allers, but decided to head down to the armory instead.

That was where Kaidan found her a few hours later, mulling over a list of upgrades, keeping up a running commentary with James about the benefits of one upgrade over another. Fascinated, he didn't make his presence known.

"So, Vega, you want the upgrade for the Valkyrie or the Argus? Kaidan and I both think the Argus weighs too much."

"Nothing against you or the Major, but the Major isn't built for a frontline assault. Not that he can't handle himself if it comes down to it. You," he chuckled, "You are a different story, Lola. Slight, but packing a lot of power to get up close and personal. I've seen those Cerberus goons piss themselves when you come flying at them, shotgun drawn. But packing something like the Argus or the Valkyrie would just slow you down. No, you need to just stick to that shotty you use to blow peoples' faces off with." James rounded the corner, and studied her. "You up for a dance, Lola?"

Shepard laughed and strode confidently over to the Lieutenant, drilling a pointed finger into his chest. "Oh yeah, Vega. Let's dance."

Kaidan chuckled and leaned against the console she had just been working at, watching as Shepard goaded Vega, ducking nimbly beneath his powerful swings, landing snapping punches to his arms and torso. "Don't look now, Lola, but your boy toy is watching," Vega growled, jerking his head towards Kaidan.

She didn't rise to the bait, however, "He's been watching about ten minutes, Vega. He loves to watch me get hot and sweaty and physical." He stumbled, and she landed a solid jab to his face, splitting his lip. "What's a matter, Vega, can't focus when your Commander talks dirty?" She grinned when he left another opening, to his ribs this time, and she executed a flawless roundhouse, leaving him doubled over. "Vega, you want to be N7, you learn to block all that out," she told him quietly, but sternly. "I could be talking about your mother and your grandmother, but you block it out, got it?"

He nodded sharply, and wiped the blood from his lip. "Okay, Lola, let's go," he grinned.

Kaidan watched as they circled each other, looking for an opening, chinks in the armor. He winced as Shepard took a few hard blows, one that would leave a bruise on her left cheek, and laughed outright as she landed a few of her own, to his gut and another to his face. He was about to step in to call the fight when Vega finished it with a series of fast jabs that threw her off balance as she fell on her back.

She lay there stunned for a minute before James held out a hand to pull her to her feet. James cocked his head to the side when a glint from her dog tags, which had slid partially free of her shirt, caught his eye. He caught the chain and tugged them the rest of the way out of her shirt, "Pretty, Lola," he murmured as he examined the ring he found there.

She grasped his wrist, "James, you can't say anything to anyone," she mumbled "I haven't said yes," she let the 'yet' hang in the air between them.

He dropped the chain as she released his wrist, "Don't worry, Lola, your secret is safe with me." He nodded to Kaidan as he went back to his station.

"You all right?" Kaidan called as she quickly tucked her tags back in her shirt.

"I'm fine." She moved back to stand beside him at the console. "What brings you down here?" she asked, and jumped up to sit on the countertop.

"Looking for you," he murmured with a glance around the shuttle bay, before he stepped between her knees and pressed a kiss to her lips, and nearly groaned when her tongue licked his lips, demanding entrance he gladly yielded. He broke the kiss with a frustrated sigh. "I found some of my students."

"Oh yeah, where?" she asked, looking up at his with a suggestive glint in her eyes.

"Nice try, Commander." He grinned at her and fished out the chain for her tags, playing with it. "A small squad is on Benning. I'd like to go extract them. Anderson needs them on Earth."

"We were on Benning shortly before the attempted coup on the Citadel." Shepard frowned. "Okay, have Joker set a course."

Kaidan rubbed the back of his head uncomfortably. "I, uh, already did. He also said you looked like you were going to be sick when he offered you some of his noodles," he said, concern evident in his gaze as he studied her.

"I hate those noodles. It's not natural."

"Neither is half the shit we eat these days," Kaidan shrugged.

"Commandeering my ship to rescue your squad? Tsk, tsk, Major," she said as they made their way to the elevator.

He put his hands on her waist and pulled her close as the elevator doors slid shut." We have a couple hours before we get to Benning," he murmured suggestively, his lips hovering over her ear.

"Well, Major, I suggest we go test our reach and flexibility," she whispered, pulling him close.

* * *

><p>"Damn it, Cortez, just find me something that fits," Shepard snapped, as she was still having problems with her armor. With Kaidan's help, she squeezed into the undersized one, and gave a wiggle of her torso in an attempt to get more comfortable. She saw Cortez mutter something to James under his breath, and saw James' face light up with a grin, and narrowed her eyes at the two of them. They wiped the smiles from their faces and bent over their omni-tools. Garrus and Kaidan stepped over to join her as they waited for Cortez and James to ready the shuttle.<p>

"Makes you miss the Mako, huh?" she mused, "Just get in and drop."

Garrus scowled at her, "Only when you didn't go around breaking it."

Kaidan bit his lip to hold back a grin. Shepard winked at him as the boarded the shuttle. "I thought you might like to take point on this one, Kaidan. Since they're your people."

"Ah, thanks, Shepard. I don't have an exact location, something is jamming the signal. He pulled up a map of the area, and pointed to a section, "This is the most likely place for them to be, easily defendable, and extraction shouldn't prove too difficult."

"Ok, let's do this."

"Ah, Commander, just to let you know, you'll want to hustle. There's a storm heading this way, so unless you want to fight in the rain…"Cortez told her.

She shuddered; she hated being in the rain in her armor. "All right, let's move."

They touched down, and met remarkably little resistance. It seemed the extremists that attacked in the first place had lost interest in the location. There was no Alliance presence though, so that was worrisome.

"Shepard, over here!" Garrus called as he crouched next to a young woman slumped behind a low wall, her blue barrier barely flickering.

"Kaidan! Here!" she called as she ran over. She quickly administered a pack of medigel, and the girl's breathing immediately evened out.

"Thanks," she croaked from cracked and bloodstained lips. "Alliance?"

"I'm Commander Shepard, and Major Alenko is with me," she reassured the woman, and glance up as Kaidan dropped to his knees beside her, scanning her with his omni-tool.

"Kate, what happened? Where is the rest of the squad?"

Kaidan spoke to her in reassuring tones while Shepard pulled Garrus aside, "Can you sit with her for Cortez to pick her up? She needs to see the doc ASAP.

Garrus' mandibles twitched uncomfortably, "Sure. For the record, though, I think it's a bad idea for you to go on alone."

"I'll have Kaidan with me," she said distractedly.

Kaidan stood and came over to stand beside Shepard. "They were ambushed. The rest of the squad is holed up where I thought they would be. They had to retreat in a hurry, or they never would have left Kate. Operations Chief Katelyn Fields," he explained.

Shepard nodded, "Garrus is going to hang here while Cortez arranges a pick up. Then he'll come to meet us. It isn't much further."

He grabbed her wrist as she moved to unclip her shotgun. "I don't think we should go without Garrus, Commander. We may need a sniper."

"We'll be fine," she shook off his hand, touched his shoulder, "Can we move out?"

He sighed, and pulled his assault rifle off his shoulder. "Good luck, Garrus."

They located the rest of the small squad in the middle of a firefight. To Kaidan's chagrin, and with a look of 'I told you so,' from Shepard, they eliminated the threat without any problems. "Walker! You all okay?" Kaidan called, as they searched the area before calling all clear.

"Few bumps and bruises. Pepper took a shot to the knee, she'll be down for a while." A tall, slender man came over to greet them. "Commander Shepard, it's an honor," he said as he shook her hand.

"You know who I am?" she asked, bemused.

"Everyone knows who you are, Shepard," Kaidan muttered, his hand resting on her shoulder. "Our shuttle had to take Fields back to our ship, so we're stuck here for a bit. She was in bad shape, but she'll make it," he fended off the questions from the small squad, and passed out the energy bars he always had on him, and tried not to grin as they fell on them ravenously. He looked up as Shepard wandered away, searching corners and doorways as she went. He nodded as Garrus jogged up to join them, "Be right back," he muttered to the turian.

"It's going to rain," she said, without turning to face him.

"Yeah, probably," he said as he caught up with her.

"No, it is. My implants itch right before the weather changes. I hate being caught in a storm in my armor."

"Shepard, what's wrong?" he reached out and caught her wrist, gently tugged her to face him.

"What are we going to do with them? We can't take them with us, and we can't send them back to Earth. Not yet, anyway."

"We'll do what we always do, patch them up and contact the nearest Alliance ship to come get them. What's really on your mind? You've been distracted all day."

"Do you want to go with them?" she asked softly.

"Ah," he smiled and stepped closer to her, and put his hands on her shoulders, "I do. But I'd never leave you while I have a choice."

She stared up at him, searching his face, "I need to hear you say it," she said softly.

"Say what?" he asked, puzzled.

She pulled her tags out from around her neck, showed him the ring he'd put there a few days ago, "You know, to ask…"

"Marry me, Shepard," he said huskily, as the rain started pouring from the sky, drenching them instantly.

"Yes," she whispered, her answer drowned out by the sound of thunder cracking overhead.

"What?" he shouted over the noise.

"Yes!" she screamed, and flung herself into his arms, their bodies pressing as close as their armor would allow while the storm raged overhead. She fused her mouth to his, and kissed him deeply, drowning out the jeers and catcalls of his students as they watched, safely out of the rain. "Nothing would make me happier, Major," she whispered against his lips. "We have an audience."

"Yeah," he helped her tuck her tags back in, and stroked her face, and pushed the wet tendrils of hair back, "Shall we go back, future Mrs. Alenko?"

She snorted, "I think you should be Mr. Shepard. I am the more famous one, after all," she grinned as they walked back to get out of the rain. She grinned as he ruffled her hair, knowing it would annoy her.

Garrus stared at them, and shook his head. "I don't know why you even bring me along, Shepard."


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: So this came about from a prompt from on my tumblr account, and it seemed to work so I borrowed it! Here you go! Short and smutty ;)_

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><p>Kaidan stood beside Shepard, waiting patiently for the shuttle to take them back to the Normandy. He was uncomfortably sweaty. They had been on planet for a couple of hours, and the humidity had caused the environmental regulators on their suits to malfunction. Hence, the sweat. "Shepard, if it's going to be much longer, I'm stripping down to my skivvies. My balls," he added, pausing for dramatic effect, "Are sweaty."<p>

She choked on a laugh, "Sweaty balls? Really, Major?" she asked, her eyes wide as she studied him. Her lips twitched as his hands went to the buckles of his chest plate. She walked over to him, and stilled his hands. "It won't be much longer, and then we can do something about your…sweaty balls," she said, voice husky.

"I don't know, Shepard, I might get trench rot on my balls if Cortez doesn't get here soon. And then…" he was caught off by static from their communicators.

"Cortez, what's the hold up?" She asked, and frowned as he told her through bits of static that there was a bad rainstorm preventing him from getting to their location. He recommended they head towards a new rendezvous, 10 klicks to the south. They both groaned, they were already hot, sweaty, and tired. The idea of a six-mile march did not make them happy. A single raindrop fell from the sky, landing on Shepard's cheek, "Are you fucking kidding me?" she shouted at the sky, scowling as gradually more and more drops fell, and they were standing in the middle of a torrential downpour. She stalked over to a plant with wide leaves, and whipping out her combat knife, she cut the stalk, and held it over her head.

Kaidan bit back a laugh at the sight she presented, one hand fisted on a cocked hip, the other holding her makeshift umbrella. She turned her head and looked back at him over her shoulder. "You coming?"

"I certainly hope so," he muttered, jogging to catch up with her. "My balls still need attention," he said, snagging her umbrella/leaf away from her to protect his own face for the rain. For a leaf, it was doing a decent job; the rest of him was a different story, however.

"Your balls," she snarled, and snatched the leaf back, "Can find their own umbrella. Why didn't we bring our helmets? Helmets would have helped, right?"

He chuckled, and stepped in front of her, she paused, eyebrow raised, and he crouched in front of her, took her knife from her boot. He took in the look of disappointment she attempted to hide behind a frown, "Were you expecting something else?"

She grumbled, and stalked off in the direction of the rendezvous. He cut his own leaf, and hurried to catch up to her. She held out her hand and he gave her the knife back. She cast him a slant-eyed glance, her lips twitching, rain streaming down her face as she lowered the leaf, "Oh, fuck it," and with a gusty breath, tossed her leaf to the ground, and grasped his armor, and crushed him to her, fusing her lips to his. He groaned into her mouth as her tongue swept in to plunder, his arms holding her tightly.

His eyes flew open in surprise as he felt her hands at the clasp of his chest plate, groaned as he was instantly soaked to the bone, but not willing to interrupt her as she stripped him to his greaves. "Uh," he stammered as she dropped to her knees on the spongy ground beneath them, stroking his heavy erection with one hand. "Shepard," he gasped, and she pressed her lips to the silky head, and her hot lips enveloped him. He ruthlessly tamped down the urge to buck his hips as her tongue swirled around him. He groaned as he felt her lips moving up and down the length of him, and groaned deep in his throat. She set a demanding rhythm, and he felt her own moan of pleasure when he fisted a hand in her hair.

"Shepard," he whispered harshly, another groan breaking from his lips, as he was unable to prevent the sharp thrust of his hips, and felt her teeth lightly scraping against him. "Shepard," he warned again, her tongue swirling over him, her lips creating a tight seal as she stroked him. "Oh God," he moaned, jerking his hips again, and shouted her name as he reached a type of ecstasy he'd been unaware existed. She hummed her approval against his turgid length, swirled her tongue to ensure she'd missed nothing, and felt his fingers stroking softly at her neck, and noticed for the first time in some minutes the rain sluicing down her face.

"Shepard," he whispered, not trusting his voice, something like wonder in his tone, as he helped her to her feet, and crushed his lips to hers. She smiled sweetly against his lips, and brushed her hands through his hair, looked longingly into his eyes. She lay a hand against his chest, felt his heart still thundering there. "Totally worth it," she grinned, and set to work helping him put his armor to rights for the remaining hike. "How are those balls?" she asked.

He bit back a moan, and smirked at her, "Better now."

"Just remember, payback is a bitch," she said, and walked off.

"Yes, yes it is," he murmured, watching the seductive sway of her hips before mentally shaking himself and catching up to her for the rest of the hike.


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

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><p>They had an audience. Word had gotten out that Kaidan was trying to teach Shepard how to dance. They were in the Armory, the only large, clear space they could find, and the crew had been trickling in, leaning on the weapon consoles, trying not to laugh at their commanding officer.<p>

"Shepard, you're too stiff," Kaidan said, "Loosen up a bit. Even Vega can do the tango."

"Hell yeah, Lola!" Vega cried from the sidelines, and did a quick cha-cha by himself. "I came out of the womb doing the tango. I was born to move."

"Is that right? Well, why to you show me how it's done, Lieutenant?" she stepped away from Kaidan, and gestured to him with one hand. Vega laughed easily, and walked over. "Who's gonna be the girl?" she teased.

"Definitely the Major," Vega said quickly.

"What's wrong, Vega, not secure enough in your machoism to be a lady?" Kaidan laughed, taking the hand Vega held out for him.

"Not that, I just know that if Lola sees me swinging my hips, she won't be able to resist me, and she'll have her way with me. No sir, I don't have a death wish today," Vega said confidently.

Kaidan just rolled his eyes, and with a nod of his head, the music began, and they set off. The entire crew had a good laugh at the expense of the two macho men tangoing across the Armory of an Alliance frigate. Shepard laughed too, but she was watching the sway of their hips, the deliberateness of their steps. She noticed that each step was calculated and purposeful, much like moves on a battlefield. They weren't sliding across the floor as she'd always thought, but they were graceful enough to make it appear that they were.

As soon as the music ended, and the men pulled away from each other, laughing, she strode over to them and gave Kaidan a sharp nod. "I got this." He grinned wolfishly at her, and took her in his arms, his hand at her waist pulling her much closer than he'd been with Vega. "I'll count it out for you, darling," he drawled in her ear. He straightened up and nodded his head for the music to start. "And, quick, quick, slow. Quick, quick, slow." She followed his lead, and as they repeated the same steps, she gradually started to loosen up and her movements became more relaxed and natural. He smirked at the swaying of her hips, so different from her usual swagger. He lengthened his stride just a bit, and she blushed at the feel of his iron thigh sliding between her own as they danced. She tried to focus on her steps, but only succeed in missing a step. He caught her, and pulled her back into rhythm, "You didn't dance like this with Vega," she murmured.

"Hmm, no, only you, my love," he murmured back, and decided she was ready, asked, "Ready to try a spin? Just follow my lead." He spun her away from him, and she only stumbled a little as she turned back to him. "Again," he demanded, and spun her again. She executed it better that time, and he made her do it one more time. She tripped at the apex of the turn, however and landed firmly on her bottom. She scowled as he offered her a hand and pulled her to her feet. "You know what you need? A pair of heels. Your boots are weighing you down, making you clumsy."

"What?" she asked incredulously.

"Hell yeah, Lola! A pair of heels will make your already spectacular ass a-maz-ing!" Vega hooted from the sidelines.

"The caveman is correct, Commander," Kaidan grinned, and gave her butt a friendly squeeze. He nodded his head firmly, and turned to the crew, eyeing them, "Who wears a size 38 in women's?" Traynor timidly raised her hand, refusing to meet Shepard's eyes. He nodded with a smile, and she scampered off, returning shortly with a pair of brilliant red heels. She handed them over to Shepard, and reluctantly, Shepard rolled up her trousers, and toed off her boots, stuffing her socks in her boots. She slid the shoes on her feet, and straightened up, surprise to find herself just an inch or two shorter than her partner now. "Let's do this," she said, striding over to their usual starting position. He watched the swing of her hips as she walked away. She was hell in high heels.

He gathered her in his arms, and as the music started, they took off, and a little to her dismay, he had been correct. No longer weighed down by her heavy combat boots, she was able to move more quickly and gracefully through the steps. She tried to ignore the feel of his thigh moving between her legs, and his strong arm wrapped around her. She followed his lead, and he sent her into a flawless spin, pulling her back to him with ease. She forgot everything she was doing as she felt his warm palm slide over her side, her mouth going dry. Why had she never tried this before? The moves were so sensual and seductive, or maybe it was just her partner. She danced with him, stuttering through the steps when his hand would slide over her butt, pulling her closer than was strictly necessary. They finished the song as he spun her away and pulled her back, locking his lips with hers in a deep kiss, ignoring the jeers and hoots of the crew. "Race you to your cabin," he breathed against her lips.

"You're on," she murmured back, and pushed him away as she raced towards the elevator, moving surprisingly fast for a woman in heels, Kaidan in hot pursuit.

Traynor watched in dismay, and looked at Vega, "I don't want to ask for those back, do I?"

Vega laughed, "Nope, probably not."


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: You guys. Can I just express my love of all things that is Shenko? That is all. Enjoy the chapter!_

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><p>Specialist Traynor stood outside the door to Shepard's cabin, waiting patiently after knocking softly to request entrance. "Specialist Traynor, Shepard is currently sleeping, is this an emergency?" EDI asked quietly.<p>

"Ah, I received a message regarding ex-Cerberus scientists that would be an asset to building the Crucible. They require rescue." Traynor replied, squirming uncomfortably.

"One moment," after a brief pause, "You may enter, Specialist," EDI said as the door to the cabin unlocked and slid open.

Traynor walked in, and softly called for Shepard, a tad alarmed when she saw the bed was unoccupied. She took the few steps toward the living area, and stopped short at what she found. Shepard was lying against the armrest of the sofa, her legs draped across Kaidan's lap, while he was leaning to rest his head against her chest. Both were sleeping with their arms wrapped around the other's torso. Traynor sighed, feeling guilty for interrupting the moment of peace they had found in each other. "Commander?" she called softly, and leaned over to gently shake Shepard's shoulder.

"Huh?" Shepard blearily opened her eyes, looking around for the source that woke her. "Traynor?"

Kaidan woke with a jerk, reaching for the pistol he kept on the nightside table, but it wasn't there. He tightened his hold on Shepard as he glanced around to figure out where he was, his biotics flaring briefly as he prepared to throw up a barrier, and noticed Traynor standing above them both looking guilty. "What is it, Specialist?"

"I'm sorry to disturb you, Commander, Major, but we've received a communication from Arrae. You'll want to read this," she said nervously, and thrust the datapad towards Shepard.

Kaidan smiled easily, "Relax, Traynor. EDI and Joker wouldn't have let you in if it wasn't important."

Traynor shuffled on her feet, "Yes, sir."

"It's okay, Traynor. Have Joker set a course for Arrae; we'll hit Gellix first thing tomorrow. Looks like we need to take care of this as soon as possible." Shepard handed the datapad back to her, and Traynor moved to beat a hasty retreat. "And Traynor, don't feel guilty for waking us. We have a duty to uphold, so it isn't a bother," Shepard called to her as the Specialist fled the room. She turned to Kaidan and kissed him long and deep. "My back is stiff," she laughed, "But worth it to wake up with you like this."

"Yeah."

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><p>"Looks like we're going in hot, people, stay sharp," she called to Kaidan and Garrus as the shuttle door lifted open and they jumped out. She snarled at Garrus as he immediately pushed her into cover when she locked on to a target to charge at him. "Vakarian!" she snapped out a warning, shook him off, selected a new target, and charged across the field. She heard Kaidan's shout of warning as she realized a bit belatedly she had miscalculated, and dropped to a knee as she detonated her shields in the group of troopers, sending them flying. There was one Cerberus trooper left standing, and she casually raised her shotgun and blasted him in the chest as she walked by.<p>

Kaidan scanned the area as he jogged to join Shepard, "All clear, Shepard." He walked up as she was crouching behind a barrier, helping an injured man to his feet.

"Jacob, what are you doing here? You're hurt."

"I'll live, I'll tell you more once we get inside."

"All right, let's get these people out of here, before more Cerberus troops show up."

"Shepard, your leg is bleeding. Profusely." Kaidan quickly shoved her into a seat on the shuttle, and ripped a larger hole in her underarmor around the wound on her left thigh. She shivered as he applied liberal amounts of medigel. "Hey, Shepard, stay with me!" He glanced up at her, surprised and worried to see her eyes going glassy. He ruthlessly suppressed the panic he felt rising, and snapped his fingers in front of her face to get her attention, staring hard at her as she shook her head, "Garrus, radio Dr. Chakwas, let her know Shepard has a gunshot wound to her left thigh, and medigel hasn't stopped the bleeding."

"Huh?" she said, and blinked a few times. "I'm fine. T'tally fine."

"I'm not a medical doctor, but maybe I could help?" Brynn offered. She rifled through the first aid kit under the seat and came up with a field dressing treated with medigel. She applied the bandage and tied it on tightly, and took the Commander's pulse. "Don't worry, she'll be fine. Pulse is strong; she's just a bit shocky from blood loss. She may limp for a while, and she may need a few stitches," she said as she administered a dose of painkillers.

Kaidan nodded, and studied Shepard for a moment. After the initial panic had subsided, he knew she would be fine. He sat next to her and put an arm around her shoulders.

"Kinda hurts," she slurred, fighting the lull of oblivion the painkillers offered, and slumped against him.

"I know it does, baby," he murmured, and gave her shoulders a quick squeeze. He hauled her up into his arms as the shuttle docked with the Normandy, careful not to jar her injured leg. He breathed a sigh of relief when he found Chakwas standing by as soon as he stepped off the shuttle. "She's stable, so I can carry her up. Don't want to jostled her any more than necessary."

Chakwas just raised an eyebrow and said nothing. She instructed him to place her on one of the beds in the medbay. "Don't worry, Major. I will take care of the Commander from here," she told him, shooing him from the area. With one last backwards glance, he left to make arrangements for the ex-Cerberus crew to meet up with the engineers at the Crucible.

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><p>Chakwas tracked Kaidan down a few hours later, and found him picking at a tray of food in the starboard observation deck. "Major, I need to speak with you about something very important." He jerked his head up at the sound of her voice, and she felt guilty when the blood drained from his face. "Shepard is fine, I have her sedated for a bit. She woke shortly after surgery and wanted to get up and moving." Chakwas explained.<p>

"So she'll be back to normal soon enough?" Kaidan asked as the color started to come back to his cheeks.

"Yes, she has some heavy skin weave implants that speed healing remarkably. She'll be up and making trouble for you in a few hours. No, there is something else I wish to discuss with you, Major. I know you and Shepard have been physically intimate for some time, but could you clarify when you first became intimate? Ah, during this tour of duty?" Chakwas took one of his hands, and held it comfortingly.

Kaidan blushed furiously, and counted back, "Almost three months ago."

Chakwas smiled, "And during that time, have you noticed anything different about the Commander?"

Kaidan blew out a breath, "Yeah, a few things. I've had a few suspicions…"

"Well, I believe I can confirm your suspicions, Shepard is pregnant. About two months along, I believe, but I won't know for certain until I can speak to her."

Kaidan's eyes went wide and he jumped to his feet. Even though he'd told himself it was a possibility, there was no way to truly prepare for being told he was to be a father. "You're certain?"

"I ran the test twice." Chakwas frowned, "You know I am required to report her condition to the brass." She looked up at him and gave him a soft smile, "You'll be wonderful parents."

Kaidan exhaled loudly, "I know. I just, we can't tell her."

Chakwas' frown grew more stern, "Major, I cannot keep this information from her."

"I know, I'm just asking you to hold off on telling her." He hurried on to explain his reason as he saw the implacable set to her jaw. "Shepard is under a lot of stress. And telling her we're going to be parent," he choked on the words, and Chakwas saw what suspiciously looked like tears glistening in his eyes. "If you tell her, it will add to the stress and guilt." Kaidan swallowed and went to stand by the window to look out at the stars. "What if the worst happens, and her last thought is that she failed," he said softly, his voice oddly husky.

"Kaidan, I understand all of that. Truly, I do. Do you know how many soldiers I've had to give similar news to, only after it was too late for their partner? I will not do that to Shepard, or to you. These may be our darkest days, and darker yet still to come, but you and Shepard should use this time to celebrate the miracle that you have created! It really is nothing short of a miracle she was able to conceive at all considering the amount of stress she's under." She studied Kaidan for a moment before continuing on, "I supposed you have more of a stress relieving quality than we all thought." She stood, and walked over to lay a soft hand on his shoulder. "I can't give you time, but I will let you tell her yourself if you like." She hesitated for a few moments, "I also recommend holding off on telling the rest of the crew. As a precaution."

"Thank you, Doctor. I'd like that. Do you know how…?"

She chuckled, "Do you want to know in the literal sense, or why she wasn't on fertility suppressants?"

He blushed furiously, "Um, I know the how, just not the why."

"Well, Shepard has never been consistent about remembering her monthly injections, and during the Collector mission, she didn't need them at all." She shrugged, "I suppose it never occurred to either of us once you were back on board."

"Okay, that makes sense, I guess," he scrubbed his hands over his face as Chakwas left the room. What the hell had they gotten themselves into this time?


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Hello everyone! Thank you for all of the alerts and favorites and reviews! Just so you all know, I start a new job today, so updates may become a little more sporadic, but I still plan on finishing this story out! So just bare with me! Now, onward!_

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><p>He went to sit with her, to talk with her, even if she was unable to talk back. "Hey there, beautiful." He watched her relaxed features, studying them while she was still sleeping. "We're going to have a baby. Can you believe that?" He sucked in a deep breath. "I can't. But it makes sense when you think about all the practicing we've been doing. I don't know how to tell you all this when you wake up." He sighed, and let his head drop to the hand he had picked up and held tight. "No matter what, Celia, I love you. I always will." He pressed his lips to her knuckles, and held her hand to his cheek. He smiled down at her when he saw her eyes slowly peel open and she gave him a goofy grin.<p>

"Hey there." She drank in the sight of him, eyes the color of aged whiskey, thick, curly black hair that was slowly turning salt and pepper. She stared at his full lips for a moment, and noticed the thin scars around his mouth. She shook her head when she realized he was speaking to her. "I'm sorry, what?"

His smile faltered, and she frowned, whatever she had missed had been important.

"We need to talk, Shepard," he said quietly.

_Oh God,_ she thought frantically, _did I screw something up?_

He saw the panicked expression on her face, and hurried on, "The doc ran some tests on you today, while you were under. And she found something that was, a bit unusual. God, this sounded a lot less awkward in my head."

"Uh-huh," she chuckled, and laced her fingers with his, held his hand tightly, "What is it?"

Kaidan swallowed, "First, you need to know that I love you, unconditionally. Second, well, you're pregnant."

She stared at him, stunned. After several long minutes, he watched as several conflicting emotions raced across her face. He saw something like panic, wonder, a hint of fury, and joy, before a radiant smile broke out over her face, "That's amazing," she said, breathlessly, and threw her arms around him in a fierce hug. "You're going to be a wonderful father."

"I – I hope so. You aren't mad?" He half stood so he was leaning on the bed, holding her close.

"Of course not. Okay, maybe a little, but it's like I told Jacob earlier, I want a chance to settle down and have a family. No time like the present, right?" she smiled wanly, "Of course, this might be our only chance," she said quietly, and held his steady gaze.

"Don't say that. We're going to kick some Reaper ass. Then find that tropical island and pop out a kid or three or four."

She threw back her head on a laugh, "As long as it's tropical." She leaned closer to him and gave him a gentle kiss. "You know this can't affect the mission."

"I know, but remember that I'm here for you, anything I can do to take some of the considerable weight off your shoulders." He sighed heavily, kissed her forehead, and smiled at her.

"Commander, Admiral Hackett would like to speak to you on vid comm." Traynor interrupted them over the comm.

"Thanks, Traynor. Well, you think you can help me to the war room? I doubt I could make it there under my own steam."

Kaidan grinned, and helped her to her feet as she threw an arm over his shoulder and pulled her to a standing position. "Want me to carry you?"

"Hmmm…how long was I out?" she asked as she shuffled her feet to walk, wincing slightly at the pain in her thigh.

"Couple hours."

"Then I have a sinking feeling I know what this is about. They're going to want to talk to you, too."

* * *

><p>Shepard and Alenko stood in front of the quantum entanglement communicator, and Shepard was a bit distressed to find Hackett and Anderson waiting for her. She was leaning heavily on Kaidan, and she knew that it showed.<p>

"Shepard, I just recieved a disturbing report from Dr. Chakwas. Is this true?" Hackett asked gruffly.

"Yes sir, I just found out myself a few minutes ago," She shuffled a little, ignoring the twinge in her thigh.

"I'm not going to ask how this happened, but dammit, Shepard, the situation isn't good."

"Too be fair, sir, it was an accident," She stated clearly, staring the holograph of Hackett dead in the eyes.

"Shepard, I didn't fall off the turnip truck yesterday. Alenko didn't just trip into your bed and happen to make a baby as you untangled yourselves. I have kids of my own, I know how it works." Hackett pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Shepard, Alenko, there are regs for a reason." Anderson said sternly, his displeasure clear on his face.

"It won't happen again, sir," she replied glibly, her eyes downcast. For some inexplicable reason, she was finding it extremely difficult not to laugh. Or cry, she couldn't decide which.

Hackett blew out a breath, and studied her for a long minute, "We can't afford for you to go on light duty, Shepard. We need you in the field."

"Agreed, sir. I have no plans to limit myself in the field. This won't slow me down, at least, not yet. If anything, it makes what we're fighting for even more important," she finished quietly, felt Kaidan's arm tighten around her to imperceptibly pull her closer.

"And you, Major, what have you to say for yourself. Dammit, son, I trusted you!" Anderson said, glaring at Kaidan, his jaw tightening.

"I have plenty to say, but none of it would be appropriate. An apology isn't exactly high on the list, either. Nor is a promise to stay out of her way." Kaidan said hotly, feeling his blood boil. He sucked in a deep breath and counted to ten to cool his temper, "I'll take care of her, sir," he said softly.

"See that you do. Well, what's done is done." Hackett said with a sharp nod. "Consider yourselves official chastised, and all that. Unofficially, I hope you kids know what you're doing. But I hope the best for you both," he gave them a warm smile.

She glanced up at Anderson to see a slight smile tugging at his lips as he nodded, also. He had been like a father to her since her own had gone down in the line several years ago, and the thought of disappointing him didn't sit well with her. "Nothing will stop us from sending the Reapers back to hell, sirs."

"Good to hear. Now, on to some other business. Shepard, I located your mother. She was very insistent I let her speak with you." Hackett told her, as the projection of her mother shimmered into view next to him. "We'll give you some privacy. Hackett out."

"Shepard, be careful. Anderson out."

Shepard stood there, leaning even more heavily on Kaidan as the blood drained from her face. "Mom. You're okay," she whispered, "I was worried."

"Admiral, it's good to see you again," Kaidan said, adjusting his grip on Shepard's waist to take more of her weight.

"Alenko, Celia." A slightly older version of Shepard looked back at them. Her hair was a little lighter in color, and she was a little shorter than the woman leaning into him, but overall, they were nearly identical. Hannah sighed, "What kind of a mess have you gotten yourself into?"

"Uh, we didn't intend…" Shepard trailed off, blushing a little as she watched her mother. She had only seen her once or twice while she had been incarcerated on Earth. She unconsciously began twirling the ring on her left hand with her thumb, and promptly stopped when her mother caught the movement and narrowed her eyes.

"I know, and I can see that the Major plans to make an honest woman of you," her face was transformed as the stern expression melted to a softer, happier one. "I've been so worried, Celia. I'm happy to see you are doing well. Never thought I'd become a grandma during this war," she chuckled, noticed her daughter relax slightly and lean her head against Kaidan's shoulder. "How is the leg? I hear you took bullet today."

"It's okay, a little sore, I'll be back to normal in a day or two."

"How far along are you?"

"Um…" she looked up at Kaidan, who supplied the answer, "About two months.

Hannah laughed, "You look fantastic. When I was pregnant with you, I was so sick I couldn't move. I looked like I had been run over by a bus. Your dad couldn't walk into the room without me bursting into tears. Glad you didn't inherit that trait."

"Mom," Shepard breathed, smiling wearily, "I miss you."

"I miss you, too, Honey. Just stay strong. Keep doing me proud. Take care of my girl, Alenko."

"Yes, Ma'am," Kaidan replied as the call was ended. "Now, I'm going to take you upstairs and put you to bed. Then I'm going to browbeat Traynor into making dinner tonight so you'll actually eat."

"Sounds like a plan," she smiled as he scooped her off her feet and carried her to the elevator.


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: I don't particularly care for Allers, and I'm sure it shows. It's for comedic value, though, and not out of character hate. Sorry, Allers. Also, someone asked a while back for jealous Kaidan. This happened instead, enjoy!_

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><p>Shepard was walking through the CIC and glanced up to find Kaidan working at the terminal next to the Galaxy Map. She frowned as she noticed he was talking to Allers. She saw red when Allers ran a finger down his chest, and pouted up at him, trapping him against the console. She came up behind Allers, and grabbed a fistful of her hair and jerked her away from Kaidan. "I know you aren't harassing one of my crew, Allers," she stated with deadly calm.<p>

Allers shrieked in surprise, and stammered a denial.

"Shepard…" Kaidan started to say, but fell silent; he knew better than to defend the woman.

"You, stay out of this," she directed at Kaidan, and grasped Allers by her upper arm and dragged her bodily through the CIC towards the airlock, grinning viciously when the other woman stumbled as one of her towering heels broke. She heard Joker frantically tell EDI to unlock the interior door as she approached. "Give me one good reason not to toss you out this airlock right now," Shepard snarled, her face a feral mask of fury. Allers had been reduced to a weeping mess, and could only utter incoherent sentences. "I want you off my goddamn ship. I don't care where we dock next. We're heading to Thessia soon, I hear some of the asari are hot to trot for reprobate hussies like you." Shepard took a deep breath, and counted to five, "If I lay eyes on you again, I have a bullet with your name on it. If you lay a finger on any of my crew, if you even look at them in a manner I deem inappropriate, and believe me, I _will_ know about it, I will throw you out this airlock. Are we clear?"

"I-I-I-I…" Allers stuttered, her eyes wide with fear.

"I said, Are. We. Clear?" Shepard roared, "I swear to God, I'll open that door!" Shepard grasped her chin and pointed toward the exterior airlock door.

"Yes! Yes, we're clear!" Allers screamed, and sank to the floor as her knees gave out.

"Excellent. No one touch her," Shepard commanded as she strode away towards the elevator. "And if she isn't back in her hole in engineering in ten minutes, let me know, EDI. I'll handle it." She found Kaidan waiting for her by the elevator, his eyes wide with disbelief.

"Shepard, I-"

"You. Are. Mine." she growled fiercely, jerking him into the elevator with her.

"No question there. That's, ah, quite the jealous streak you have there," He was cut off as her lips claimed his, her hands fisting in his hair. Kaidan weakly called for her cabin as she jumped on him.

* * *

><p>Kaidan entered the port side lounge and found Joker showing a vid to Garrus, James, and Cortez. "Watch Allers' face! I'm pretty sure she pissed herself!" Joker snickered, and Kaidan narrowed his eyes as he realized it was the surveillance feed from a few days ago.<p>

"You better not let the Commander catch you with that, Joker." Kaidan warned, battling his better judgment, as he was dying to see the vid too.

"Yeah, yeah. You want to watch it, too?" Joker asked.

Kaidan hesitated for a moment, before giving in, "All right, just make it fast." He sat down, promising him self he'd only be a few minutes. He was stifling his laughter as the door to the lounge hissed open, and Shepard, Liara, and Tali walked in. Javik was not far behind.

"What do we have here," she asked sweetly, and perched on the arm of the sofa next to Kaidan.

"Uh, nothing really, Commander." Joker hedged, shutting down the vid feed.

"I insist, Joker, play it again for my benefit."

"Uh…" Joker played it again, and pulled his cap down low over his face.

He sat stone-faced until he heard her gasping breaths as she tried not to laugh. "I am such a _bitch_!" she cried, before dissolving into a fit of laughter. She rocked back and forth before losing her balancing and sliding off the arm of the sofa into Kaidan's lap.

Liara was giggling softly, and Tali had buried her visor in her hands, her shoulders heaving as she laughed silently.

Javik broke the ice, "I would have assisted with the airlock, Commander. That one was more primitive than the other human females on this ship."

Shepard considered his words for a moment before dissolving into another fit of giggles. Kaidan could only sit there, enjoying the feel of her in his lap. He picked up one of her hands and laced their fingers, catching her attention. "You're funny when you're pissed. As long as your pissed-off-ed-ness is directed at someone else," he clarified.

She grinned up at him, "You haven't been on the receiving end of my self-righteous anger, count yourself lucky."

James studied Shepard, "Lola, that was a whole new level."

"You weren't on Feros."

Garrus and Kaidan nodded sagely, wisely saying nothing about her confrontation with the Exo-Geni representative. It hadn't ended well for him.

"It is not normal behavior for human females to stake such a violent claim," Javik stated, but Shepard took as a question.

"That wasn't really staking a claim, that was defending my crew from the machinations of evil."

"Say what you wish, your pheromones state otherwise."

Shepard frowned, and stared down at her hands.

James looked around the room, "Uh, skyllian five, anyone?" There was a chorus of yeses, and the group migrated to the poker table.

"So, there we were on Ilium, and Shepard's biggest fan was standing at the bar in the worst N7 armor I'd ever seen. He was going on and on about how Shepard stuck a gun in his face, and I wish to the Spirits she had pulled the trigger then, and how that moment had changed his life forever. While he was talking, Shepard pulled out her pistol, and shot him in the foot. He cried and whined about some mission he was on, and the bar was a front for weapons or something ridiculous. So we track down the asari that gave him the original information. She thought we were as stupid as Shepard's fan club, until Shepard stuck her pistol in her face, and flicked the safety off," Garrus told the story after James asked about Conrad, having met him on the Citadel.

Shepard barked out a laughed, "That was the most fun I'd had since I woke up on Lazarus station! Read 'em and weep, boys, full house!" She claimed her winnings, and sat back in her chair. Her hand slid to Kaidan's thigh. She yawned, and decided to quit while she was ahead. She ruffled a hand through Kaidan's hair, and said good night to everyone else as she was leaving the room.

"You're not leaving too?" Garrus teased Kaidan as the next hand was dealt.

"I'll go up in a bit, I want to clean you guys out first," Kaidan smirked, looking over his hand.

He found Shepard asleep at her desk a little while later; face down on a pile of datapads. He sighed, and gathered her up with a sense of déjà vu, and carried her to bed.


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Just a heads up for all of you, I helped write a collaboration with eternalshiva here on and on tumblr. We also posted it on my tumblr page : brandnewandancient . tumblr . com if you are interested. We had a blast writing it, the name of the story is Absolute Chaos, it's very much worth your time, at least, we think so. Anyway, enjoy!_

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><p>Shepard was sitting at the table in the mess, staring at coffee pot in front of her that Chakwas had told her was off limits. She sighed with regret, coffee was like lifeblood to most marines, and she was no exception. She rubbed her aching temples, and pushed to her feet and strode towards the main battery. "Hey, Shepard, good to see you." Garrus greeted her as he saw her coming towards him.<p>

She sighed, and leaned against his console, "Garrus, I can tell you anything, right? You won't share what I have to say with anyone else?"

"Of course, Shepard. When you've been through what we've been through together, it creates a bond. I'll keep your secret, whatever it is." He moved around the console, and stood next to her, waiting to hear what she had to say.

"I'm pregnant." She said, and scrubbed her hands over her face. "We're facing the end of galactic civilization as we know it, and I'm…pregnant."

Garrus quietly watched her and put a sympathetic arm around her shoulders. Waited for her to speak again.

"I'm only eight weeks along, and it takes humans nine months. I can't help but to think I owe it to my child to take myself out of this fight, but that's selfishness talking," her jaw clenched, and he heard her teeth grinding together.

He gripped her by both shoulders, gave a slight shake, "There is nothing selfish about it, Shepard. Nothing. The fact that you managed to get, er, pregnant, at all is a bit of a miracle. Or a catastrophe. Anyway, at the end of all this, we'll either kick some serious Reaper ass, or we'll all be dead. So it won't matter."

She laughed, "Count on you to cheer me up, Garrus." She startled him when she pressed a quick kiss to his scarred cheek. She straightened up, "Thanks for listening to me."

"Ah, no problem, Shepard."

She stopped at the door, looked back at him, "Everyone suspects, don't they? For weeks now."

"Still no comment," he shifted uncomfortably, wishing he had pockets to jam his hands into.

She narrowed her eyes at him, and thought back to her crew's odd behavior over the last few weeks. "You've started a pool, haven't you?" she deadpanned.

"What?" the sound he made was suspiciously like a squeak at the murderous gleam he saw in her eyes.

She stalked over to her turian friend, "You realize there will be hell to pay for anyone I catch participating in such an illicit scheme," she said, her tone syrupy sweet. "Then I'll confiscate the funds, and pay for, I don't know, whatever it is that babies need."

"It'll pay for a college education," he muttered under his breath, and she scowled at him when she didn't catch what he had said.

"I'm on to you, Vakarian. All of you," she stalked towards the elevator, and decided to go screw with her pilot.

* * *

><p>She stood quietly behind Joker, knowing that he knew she was there, trying to decide the best way to mess with him. She knew there was no way Garrus would spill the beans, he was too intimidated by her.<p>

"Hey, Commander. You going to stand back there all silent and broody all night?" Joker asked irritably.

Shepard bit her lip and stifled a grin. "No, just thinking. You know, about when the war is over. What's next for me, I guess."

Joker's ears perked up, hoping for some juicy piece of gossip, "Yeah? What's on your agenda? Marry Kaidan? Make babies?"

Shepard snorted, "Marry Kaidan, sure, but babies? I'm not exactly mother material, Joker. Besides, I doubt I can even have kids with all the tech in the chassis. Dr. Chakwas doesn't seem to believe it either. Anyway, I just had a physical a few days ago, everything is normal." She let her tone convey some melancholy, when she was really dying of laughter inside.

"Oh, sorry, uh, sorry to hear that, Commander. For what it's worth, I think you'd be a great mom," he muttered, his face and the back of his neck turning scarlet, and turned back to his console.

"Shepard, may I speak with you for a moment?" EDI asked from the co-pilot chair.

"Sure, EDI," she followed the AI to the airlock door, and grinned when they slid shut behind them.

"You lied to Jeff," EDI stated, a hint of humor in her tone.

"Yes, I can't prove it, but I believe he's started a betting pool around Kaidan and I. I would like to make sure I have your discretion, EDI. There are consequences when you make a bet on your superior officers. Joker needs to learn a lesson."

EDI considered her for a few moments; "Very well, I will not speak with Jeff on this matter."

"Thanks, EDI."

She walked to the elevator, and selected the floor for her cabin. She leaned against the wall, lost in thought. She glanced up when the door slid open, and she found Kaidan on his way down.

"Hey there," he murmured, pulling her into an embrace. "Where have you been, I was just coming to find you."

"Well, I was sniffing the coffee pot since I can't have any. Then I went to talk to Garrus, did you know the crew has a betting pool centered around whether I'm pregnant or not?"

"You got Garrus to admit that?" he whistled, "I knew your powers of persuasion were not to be trifled with, but damn."

"He didn't admit it, per say, but he alluded to it by what he didn't say. So in retribution, I went to screw with Joker's head. He now thinks I can never have children," she grinned at him mischievously, chuckling as he lifted her off her feet and carted her into their cabin. He sat down on the sofa with her arranged across his lap, her arms wrapped around his neck.

"I guess they'll all know soon enough, probably best to hold off on telling them, though," he murmured, and pressed a sweet kiss to her lips. "Plus, when we have three or four in a few years, the cat will be out of the bag."

"You assume I want more than one?" she growled at him, and made a move to get off his lap.

He smirked and grabbed her, and rolled her underneath him as he nuzzled her neck. "When this is all over, I plan to keep you so brainless with desire for me that we never leave the bedroom," he breathed against her neck, his hands fisting in her shirt.

"What's gotten into you all of a sudden," she half laughed, half moaned, and ran her hands down his back, and firmly gripped his muscular behind.

"I find the idea of you carrying my child _incredibly_ hot," he replied, biting back a groan as she kneaded his backside.

"Oh yeah? You know, I could really use a sh-h-hower. Oh." She stuttered and moaned into his shoulder as his hand snuck under her shirt and grasped her breast. "Ah, easy there killer, they're a little sore," she hissed.

He loosened his grip, and just cupped her breast, "About that shower?" he whispered, his breath hot on her cheek. He stood and made quick work of her uniform, leaving her standing in front of him naked except for her socks. "Yum," he murmured, trailing kisses over her shoulders, taking in the smell of her, of gun oil, vanilla, and sweat, and he grinned at the sharp spike in her biotics, the blue-purple aura settling around them both as she reached out and released the fasteners of his uniform, and pushed his pants down his hips, releasing his heavy erection. "Yum," she echoed and he shuddered as her pink tongue darted out and she licked her lips.

With some difficulty, he pulled away from her, and moved towards the bathroom. He noted suspiciously that the water was already running and a cloud of steam billowed out the door when it opened. He glanced at Shepard, and she just shrugged. "It's an EDI thing. Normally she'll ask, thank God she didn't this time. Although, she probably did ask Joker." She leaned over and pulled off her socks, and heard his intake of breath as she did. She turned and wrapped one hand firmly around the back of his neck and backed him into the hot spray of water.

He growled deep in his throat as their mouths fused together, a clash of teeth, tongue, and lips. His hands clenched her waist as he pulled her against his chest. He saw the wicked glint in her eyes as she shoved him back against the wall and dropped to her knees, the hot water sluicing over her, plastering her long hair to her face.

He felt, rather than heard, the noise of contentment she made as her hand wrapped around him and her hot lips enveloped the head of his erection. He ruthlessly tamped down the urge to buck his hips as her tongue swirled around him. He groaned as he felt her lips up and down the length of him, creating hot suction. She set a demanding rhythm, her tongue stroking him from base to tip and back again, and he felt her own moan of pleasure when he fisted a hand in her hair.

"Shepard," he whispered harshly, another groan breaking from his lips, as he was unable to prevent the sharp thrust of his hips, and felt her teeth lightly scraping against him. "Enough," he grunted, and pulled her to her feet, reversing their positions and slamming her back roughly into the shower wall. He heard her harsh grunt as the move left her breathless, and roughly grabbed her thighs and hoisted her up. "Now, now, now," she demanded breathlessly as he seated himself fully in her hot, wet sheathe, and wrapped her legs tightly around his hips. She writhed against him as he pounded into her, his hands grasping the globes of her backside, massaging them between each thrust.

"Ah-Len-Ko! Oh...!"She screamed as his mouth captured her own, and his tongue thrust against hers, matching the rhythm set by his hips. He swallowed her scream as she reached a glorious climax, and with a harsh shout of his own, joined her moments later to an explosion of dark energy, and dimly heard the mirror crack.

Using the last of his strength, he again flipped their positions and rested against the wall, and slowly sank to the floor, still holding her in his lap. She slumped against him, and laid her hand over his heart, and smiled as she felt his heart still slamming against his chest. "The things you do to me," she murmured, and pressed a soft kiss to him lips, ignoring the lukewarm water still pouring over them.

"Heh, how much longer do you think we have before the water turns cold?" He wondered, shifting her to a more comfortable position.

"Hmm…I think it's already started!" she shrieked as the water turned bitterly cold. "EDI! Turn off the water! Now!" She shivered as the stream of water halted, and glanced at the shelf where the towels were stored. Feebly, she summoned her biotics, and pulled the towels to them. She snatched them out of the air and handed one to Kaidan. He grinned at her as she wrung out her hair, and buffed her head with the towel.

"Can you stand yet?" Kaidan teased, and she fumbled for purchase against the wet wall.

"Commander, there is a queue forming outside your cabin. Liara and James wish to speak with you."

"Jesus! How long have they been waiting?" She asked, frantically running to pull on her uniform, Kaidan following her movements, and scooping up any loose articles of clothing laying around and stuffing them anywhere out of sight.

"They have been waiting for exactly ten minutes and forty one seconds," EDI replied.

"EDI, why didn't you let me know they were waiting?" she hissed and she ruthlessly scraped her wet hair back into a bun.

"Jeff has instructed me that while you and the Major are in the act of copulation, baring an emergency, you are not to be interrupted. Would you like me to review the perimeters he has outlined as constituting an emergency?"

She groaned, "No." With a quick glance at Kaidan and around her cabin, she strode over to the door to greet her squadmates.

"Impressive," James joked, noting her flawless and fully clothed appearance. He nodded in greeting to Kaidan and walked past her. "I wasn't sure how long you two were gonna take." He winked at her and leaned against her desk.

"Can I help you?" Shepard asked, furrowing her brow, curious about what brought the two of them to her cabin.

"Uh, yeah. Remember when I was telling you about my uncle? I asked Liara here to help me track him down, and, thing is, she found him. He's on Demeter, and they haven't been hit by the Reapers yet. If we have time, I'd like to go get him." Vega asked, flushing as though he was embarrassed.

"Demeter? Isn't that the first human colony? We can head there tomorrow. Have Joker set a course," she said, studying her Lieutenant's face. "James, it's no hardship to go take care of this for you. I was a glorified Cerberus errand girl during my missing to take out the Collectors. Everyone needed something." She placed a soft hand on his shoulder, "We'll get to him."

"Yeah, thanks Commander," Vega said, still uncomfortable. Liara just smiled at him, and transferred the data to Shepard's omni-tool.

Kaidan waited as they walked out of the room, and closed his arms around her and she stepped into his embrace. "Time to go to work, Commander?"

She just nodded.


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Sorry for the long delay in updating. I was training for my new job which kept me busy, plus I had many, many amazing prompts on my tumblr that gave me Shenko plot bunnies that I had to write. Speaking of prompts, the last half of this chapter was originally a prompt from eternalshiva, here and on tumblr, and as I was writing this, I realized I really wanted it for this chapter, so if you follow me on tumblr, I hope you like repeats. Anyway, enough rambling, enjoy!_

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><p>Demeter wasn't what Shepard was expecting. It was a lush garden world, but it was quiet, too quiet, if you asked her. Their shuttle landed in the middle of a small city, and there weren't many people out and about.<p>

"Keep your guard up, something's fishy," she murmured into her helmet comm. She gestured to Kaidan, and his omni-tool flickered to life.

"No hostiles, Shepard," he told her quietly, and glanced over at Vega, who was poking around with his rifle. He keyed in her private channel, "Feeling alright, Shepard?" he asked, a touch of worry in his tone. He'd seen her yawn a couple times, and she hadn't slept well the night before.

He heard her chuckle in his ear, "Stop it, Kaidan. I'm fine." She walked over to him and put a hand on his shoulder.

He sighed, and tilted his head so he could catch her gaze, "It's not everyday the woman carrying my child goes out into a potentially dangerous situation."

She snorted into the comm. "I have been doing that for almost every day for two months now. I'm fine," she gave him a significant look, and stepped away, "Anything yet, Vega?"

"My uncle just pinged my 'tool," he replied, "It was pretty staticky, and I couldn't make out most of what he said, but I've got a Nav-point we can use to locate him."

"Just stay sharp," she warned, and moved ahead to take point. She knew Kaidan was still sweeping the area for hostiles, and Vega was keeping his eyes peeled for Cerberus or Reaper troops.

She growled when she spotted a Cerberus engineer placing a turret, "Take him out!" she bellowed, and with a burst of electricity, his shields were down and she was flying across the field at him, her shotgun raised to blow him away as soon as she made impact in a fiery burst of dark energy.

She heard Kaidan swear softly in her ear, and turned to select a new target. She grinned as a trooper rounded the corner, and with a resounding boom, she leveled him as well. "Damn it, Shepard! Wait for us so we can cover you!" Kaidan shouted, shooting a nearby trooper cleanly in the head.

She just grunted, and took cover; she needed Kaidan to deal with a shield pylon up ahead, anyway. "Kaidan, take out that pylon!" and she smirked as it exploded, knocking a trooper to his knees. She laughed maliciously as she fired her shotty, and threw a warp field to shred another trooper apart.

Kaidan caught up to her, and touched his helmet to hers as Vega called the all clear. "Bloodlust much, Celia?" he said quietly, and heard James' hoot of laughter.

She just smiled up at him, her eyes twinkling through the visor of her helmet. "Maybe just a little."

He shook his head and helped her to her feet, as Vega called, "He should be just up here, Lola."

"Lets go rescue his uncle," she grinned, and pumped her shotgun to eject the spent thermal clip.

* * *

><p>James' uncle was highly amusing. They'd found him defending himself from a room full of Cerberus troopers, taunting each and every one of them before he sent them to meet their maker. They quickly dispatched the remaining troops, and Shepard was very interested in learning why Cerberus was there in the first place.<p>

Unfortunately, Emilio wasn't able to tell them much. "Those Cerberus dogs just dropped out of the sky, started snatching people off the streets, and gunning down those that tried to resist. It was like a goddamned Collector attack," Emilio shook Shepard's hand, and clapped a heavy hand on James' shoulder before pulling his nephew in for a fierce hug. "Glad you showed up when you did,_ hijo_."

James laughed, and pulled away from his uncle, "What are you doing out here? I thought you were on Earth when the Reapers hit?"

Emilio sobered, "I was, I managed to get off planet. It was pretty dicey, so ask me about it some other time."

"What about Dad?" James asked worriedly.

Emilio shot Shepard a look, and she grimaced, and moved closer to James as his uncle delivered the news, "He didn't make it. I'm sorry, James."

James blew out a breath, and rubbed his brow. "Okay. It's okay," he muttered to Shepard as she placed a comforting arm around his shoulders. "No love lost there."

"Oh, James, it doesn't matter, it's still hard to lose a parent," she murmured.

"Yeah, I guess it is," he gave her a gentle squeeze, "Thanks, Lola," he muttered, his voice oddly husky.

She stepped back, knowing exactly what the marine needed, to get back to work. "Alright, let's push the rest of the Cerberus troops back and head back to the ship. We'll contact Hacket to let the Alliance know the situation."

* * *

><p>Back on the Normandy, Shepard left Emilio with James to help him settle in for the night. She also knew James would need to grieve for the parent he'd lost, even though from all accounts, Joshua Sanders hadn't been a very good father. She had a feeling Emilio was the best thing for James right now. She'd contacted Hackett, and he'd assured her they would take care of the colonists on Demeter. He was also sending a cruiser to pick up Emilio, Hackett was certain they could use him for something.<p>

She trudged upstairs with her dinner tray, and dropped it next to her laptop, and looked longingly at the bed. She was exhausted. Chakwas had told her it was normal, and if she needed to rest, then take a nap. Thirty minutes. She'd just lay down for thirty minutes, and set her 'tool to wake her, and she stripped out of her sweaty clothes and dropped facedown on the bed, dead to the world in seconds.

Kaidan came into the cabin three hours later, and frowned at her untouched dinner, and was poised to chastise her when he found her sleeping, curled around his pillow. The sight of her made him realize his own exhaustion and his jaw cracked as he yawned. He made the decision then to join her, and dropped his own clothes to the floor, and pulled the quilt up to cover them both as he slid into the bed to take the place of his pillow.

He grumbled to himself as he woke from an elbow in his side. He heard Shepard's sleepy mumble for him to roll over, and he screwed up his face as he moved to comply and realized he was already on the hairy edge of falling out of the bed. "Shepard, give me some room," he mumbled tiredly, and went to shove her over so he wasn't in danger of sliding out of the bed. Their bed was a battleground they fought on every night, sometimes he won, but mostly he lost.

Shepard grunted in her sleep, her dark curls covering her face as she protested into her pillow, but she settled down after a moment, murmuring in her sleep. Kaidan rolled onto his belly, and laid his hand on her flat belly, a sleepy smile curving his lips at the thought of their baby growing there. With that last thought, he drifted back to sleep, still feeling crowded on the tiny sliver of mattress he'd been allotted.

He woke some time later, and shivered as he realized she had rolled to the opposite side of the bed, and taken the quilt with her. He sighed, and yanked on the quilt, and rolled to his side, and kept a death grip on the coverlet to prevent her from stealing it again. He heard her soft protest in her sleep, and stifled another sigh when she rolled over, and snuggled against his back, her skin on fire where it brushed against him. He squeezed his eyes shut, and was soon asleep again.

When he woke for a third time, he groaned at the feel of her half draped across him, her nimble fingers teasing his thick shaft, her head resting against his chest. He could tell from her steady breathing that she was still sleeping, and wondered what kind of dream she was having. He felt her small foot sliding up and down against his calf, and bit back a groan as the pad of her thumb gently brushed against his silky tip, and her long fingers wrapped around him.

He pressed his head back into his pillow, the effort to keep his hips still as her hand pumped up and down his length was nearly unbearable. His heart stopped when she pulled her hand away, and with an unintelligible murmur, she rolled away, curled on her side with her back to him. He rolled with her, and wrapped his body around hers, his thick arousal nestled against her center, surprised to find her wet and hot against him.

His hand closed around her firm breast, and his lips found the base of her neck, and he felt her shiver against him as his teeth scraped against her spine, his tongue brushed roughly against her neck. He heard the soft noise she made in her throat, and smiled against her neck as her legs parted slightly to afford him better access.

He knew the exact moment when she woke, her hand grasping his as he kneaded her breast, and her head tilted forward as his mouth closed over her spine again. "Kaidan," she breathed, her soft words lingering in the air as she arched her back into him. She gasped as the hand she was still grasping tightly slid down her taut belly, and her thighs parted instinctually as their fingers found her sensitive cluster of nerves, stroking her in small circles that made her thighs quiver. Enthralled, she mimicked his movements, her fingers stroking over her own flesh as he did, soft moans escaping her parted lips.

She groaned as he slipped a finger into her slick sheath, and at his husky chuckle of approval, followed his lead, riveted by the effect their combined efforts had on her beleaguered senses. She felt his thick erection rubbing against her fevered skin as his hips moved against her, and heard his soft pants and half-groans as their entwined fingers slicked over her sensitive folds, making her pant with anticipation.

He slowly pulled their fingers from her molten core, and with a smooth shift of his hips, pushed into her tight entrance with a low groan. She cried out as their conjoined fingers stroked her clitoris in rhythm with each slow thrust of his hips. She reveled in the feel of him, filling her deeply, and the ache he created each time he retreated, only to fill her again.

She cried out as her climax rolled through her, felt her muscles spasm around him, knew he was close as she felt him swelling within her. Another orgasm rocked her unexpectedly when his teeth clamped down hard on her neck, heard his muffled grunt as his own release took him, his hips bucking into hers as he emptied into her.

They lay panting, curled into each other as their heartbeats gradually slowed, and their breathing slowed to normal. "You're a bed hog, did you know?" Kaidan murmured into her hair.

"Is that what prompted this?" she wondered, sleepiness sneaking up on her as she lay there, relaxed and content in his arms.

He laughed sleepily, "No, you started this by jerking me off in your sleep and then leaving me high and dry. So I decided to finish what you started."

She smiled, her eyes heavy as her lashes fluttered against her cheeks, "I thought it was a dream."

"One hell of a dream, darling," he mumbled.

"You're one hell of a man," she smiled, and felt his arms tighten around her as they both slipped into sleep in the exact middle of the bed. This was a battle he was looking forward to for the rest of his life.


	22. Chapter 22

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: Sorry for the long delay in updating, but it was very difficult to write anything close to the ending until the EC came out because I wasn't sure if I needed to headcanon my own or not. Anyway, hopefully now, I'm back on track with this! Enjoy!_

* * *

><p>The mission had been a failure. Shepard squeezed her eyes shut as she tucked her feet beneath her and wrapped her arms around her knees. She felt the tears tracking down her dusty skin, and hastily brushed them away. Now was not the time to get emotional. She swallowed the lump in her throat and glanced up as Kaidan turned the corner to find her sitting on the sofa in her cabin.<p>

"Hey," he rumbled softly, easing down to sit beside her, wrapping his arms around her. She leaned into his warmth, and her eyes briefly fluttered closed.

* * *

><p>"<em>Shepard! I've got you!" Kaidan shouted, grasping her arm firmly as she dangled from the edge of the collapsing floor. She gasped when her fingers slipped, felt the brief moment of weightlessness before she began to fall, and trusted in him to prevent the inevitable descent.<em>

"_Kaidan! Don't let her fall!" Liara cried, flaring blue as she rushed to assist, and seeing she wasn't needed, raced off in a futile attempt to catch Kai Leng._

_Kaidan grunted, but his grip was firm, and he reached his other hand down for Shepard to grab. His eyes met hers, and he read the unwavering trust in hers, and he swallowed hard as her gloved hand grasped his, and with a deep exhalation of breath, he pulled her up. _

_No sooner was she on her feet than she was off, tearing after Liara and Leng with blood in her eye. She fumbled for her shotgun, swearing softly when she realized it had been lost in the fall, and fell back to her pistol, steadily squeezing off each shot as she ran. _

_She skidded to a stop as Leng flew off, and stared in horror and disbelief at the chaos and distruction reigning below her. __Thessia was lost. She senses Liara halt next to her, and heard the hitch in her breath as she took in the scene below. She felt Kaidan's hand on her shoulder, and heard the stifled sob as Liara turned into her, pressing her face into Shepard's chest plate._

_Shepard's eyes met Kaidan's, and words weren't necessary as Shepard gently comforted the asari; this woman wasn't the one time rival for her affections, this was a child witnessing the destruction of her homeworld, the loss of her people. And she had trusted Shepard to prevent that from happening._

* * *

><p>"I let her down, Kaidan," she murmured softly against his chest. She felt his hand stroking her back, and lifted her chin to give him a watery half-smile.<p>

He stroked her cheek, "You haven't let anyone down, least of all Liara. She just needs a friend, Shepard." He waited as he studied her face, and his expression firmed, and he saw red for a minute, "Thessia may be lost for now, but we'll get it back. I will personally dismantle every Reaper on that planet if it will make you stop feeling sorry for yourself.

She gasped indignantly, and he bit back a smirk, this was the Shepard he knew and loved. "Excuse me? Forgive me, I forget sometimes that I'm human, and I have fucking feelings!" She shoved away from him, and pushed to her feet, pacing as she fumed. "I suppose Commander Fucking Shepard isn't allowed to feel sorry for herself for a brief moment in time after that disaster of a mission?" She growled before she rounded on him, and stopped dead in her tracks at the small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. "Ohh, I see what you did," she scowled at him.

"It worked, didn't it?" he murmured, standing and moving to wrap his arms around her once more. "It's okay," he whispered into her hair as righteous fury gave way to soft sobs of sorrow. Her arms tightened around his waist, and he felt her tears dampen the front of his uniform.

* * *

><p>"<em>We have to go back!" Liara cried, and would have raced forward into danger had Kaidan not caught her around her waist, restraining her as they waited for Cortez to arrive with the shuttle. She struggled to free her self, beating her fists ineffectively against him when Shepard just shook her head, and Kaidan hefted her up and tossed her, kicking and screaming, over his shoulders.<em>

"_There's nothing we can do here," Kaidan's deep voice met the struggling asari's ears, "Nothing, Liara," he said as he deposited her into a seat on the shuttle after the doors had firmly closed, "Nothing except die."_

"_We can still save some of them!" Liara said desperately, meeting Shepard's gaze, "Shepard, please! That is my homeworld dying down there!"_

_That proved to be exactly the wrong thing to say to the hormonally imbalanced woman, "And I watched my homeworld die weeks ago, Liara! Months, even! If the humans can hold out the fight for that long, so can the asari." Shepard took a deep breath, and walked over to Liara, knelt in front of her, taking both of her hands in her own. "I know what you are going through, Liara, Kaidan and I both do. It hurts; I hurt, every goddamn day, knowing that I left my people behind to die so I could find a way to save them. That is why we are leaving Thessia. To find a way." She held Liara's defiant gaze until the asari screwed her eyes shut, and exhaled softly._

"_I am sorry, Shepard. Once again, I've proved to be a less than true friend," Liara said._

"_Hey now, none of that," Kaidan replied, "It doesn't get better, Liara, but it does get easier. That tightness in your chest, it loosens up some, just be patient." He laid a soothing hand on the asari's shoulder._

"_Thank you both, I couldn't ask for truer friends," Liara murmured, burying her face in her hands._

* * *

><p>"Commander, you may want to head down to engineering before Liara rips Javik a new one," Joker's voice filled her cabin, and with a sigh, Kaidan and Shepard both stalked out of the cabin to deal with the newest problem.<p>

Shepard motioned for Kaidan to stay put outside of Javik's quarters, they didn't have the best history where the Prothean was involved, and strode warily into the room. She set her jaw as she heard Javik's haughty voice, "You wanted to know more about your history, asari. Now you do."

She heard the growl low in Liara's throat as she paced back and forth, "I have a name! It's Liara T'Soni!" she said angrily, flaring her biotics as she pointed her finger at Javik. "And I'd appreciate you using it-"

"Hey! Settle down!" Shepard shouted, using the voice her drill sergeants had used to make them weep as new recruits.

"My home was just destroyed, and all he can do is gloat!" Liara said furiously, her blue aura still flickering over her skin.

Shepard looked back and forth between the two combatants and inwardly sighed, "Given what's happened today, I believe you owe Liara an apology, Javik."

Javik rocked back on his heels, scowling at Liara as he crossed his arms over his chest. Indignation practically came off him in waves, "Apologize for the truth?"

Liara stared at him slack-jawed, "For not doing more! You're a Prothean! You were supposed to have all the answers!" Her voice cracked as she hurried on, battling the tears thickening her voice, "How could you not stop this from happening?"

Javik saw the slight shake of Shepard's head, and knew playing hardball with the asari would not stop the confrontation. While such behavior during the Empire would have been cause for death, this new cycle was much softer, and they needed their heavy hitters. The asari, Liara, may be soft, but she had a deft hand at information. "We believed you would."

Liara exchanged a look with Shepard, and let the gathered dark energy dissipate. "Long ago we saw the potential in your people. Even then, it was obvious: the wisdom. The patience. You were the best hope for this cycle. So you were…guided, when necessary."

Liara took a step back, "Well, it didn't work," she said sadly.

"You're still alive, aren't you?" Javik pointed out, "You're world may have fallen, but as long as there is even one asari left standing, the fight isn't over," he said firmly.

"I guess that goes for Protheans, too," she said softly.

"Despair is the enemy's greatest weapon. Do not left them wield it… Liara T'soni."

Liara gave a slight smile before she turned to leave. Shepard waited until the door slid shut. "And I thought I was the only one that could give speeches around here.

Javik shook his head, "We still need her talents. If grief overcomes her, she will be lost to us."

"Javik, thank you, even if you didn't mean a word you just said. Carry on," Shepard turned on her heels, and ran straight into Kaidan outside. "Kaidan, I-"

"Liara will fine, and I can see your exhaustion eating at you. You need to sleep, Celia," he said softly, brushing his thumb over her cheek.

"I know, but I really need to make the rounds and take care of my routine checks," she didn't protest he gently lifted her, carrying her to the elevator.

"I'm your second in command for a reason, Shepard. I can take care of it for you," he kissed her hair, "So you toddle on off to bed, I can fly the ship. Hey!" he yelped when she swatted his chest.

"You were asking for that," she murmured, glaring at him through narrow eyes. "Just be grateful that I really am too tired to teach you a lesson, and I was going to bed on my own, anyway."

"Right, keep telling yourself that," he muttered under his breath as she stalked off the elevator in a snit. He was going to pay for that one later.


	23. Chapter 23

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

_A/N: I'm sorry I've been gone for so long. I changed some of my plans for this, but fear not! The next chapter is already in the works!_

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><p>Shepard reclined on her sofa with her feet propped up in Kaidan's lap, only just resisting the urge to moan as he rubbed his knuckles into her sore arches. She struggled to let go of the stress that had been threatening to swamp her since the loss of Thessia, no easy task. She chewed on her bottom lip as her thoughts drifted and her eyes fluttered closed as she dozed, enjoying the feel of his callused hands on her feet and ankles.<p>

"_You feeling all right, Lola?" James asked as she scowled at her ill-fitting armor. She desperately needed something that fit and didn't make her chest _ache_ from the moment she put it on till long after she had removed it. She picked up a different chest plate and grimaced, _Too ugly_. She cocked her head to the side as she studied it, it did look slightly more generous in the breast department._

_She set it aside and snorted at Vega, "I'm fine, Vega." She narrowed her eyes suspiciously, "Why do you ask?"_

_He chuckled, "You only mess with your armor when you're stressed. You've got a good loadout right now, not really sure why you'd want to mess with it." He leaned a hip against the console, cocking his head to the side, "You've got mods to increase your amp cooldown and power outage. Your shields replenish almost immediately after you stomp your opponent into the ground. Although," he winked at her, "The Major may appreciate the increase in your shield recharge time on that one," he tapped the chestplate she'd just discarded."_

_She scowled, "Yeah, but it's _ugly."_ She huffed at him as he raised an eyebrow, teasing her with a pointed look. "Besides," she pinched the bridge of her nose, curling her fingers into a fist. He was her armory officer, if she couldn't talk to him about her armor woes, who could she get help from? EDI? Unlikely. She frowned as irritation surfaced, "Besides, I don't think it would fit properly," she said in a rush._

_Vega stared at her as her words sank in. "Your, uh, your gear doesn't fit right?" He bit the inside of his cheek to prevent the laugh threatening to bubble up from his gut. "You going soft on us, Lola?"_

_She growled and her hand flashed out to grip his shoulder by the pressure point she knew would have him on his knees in seconds. He lost his balance and sank to the floor with a soft hiss of pain. "Do I look like I've gone soft, _Lieutenant?_" she whispered dangerously._

"_Ah, no," he rasped, swallowing hard as darkness threatened to swamp him. He dragged in a greedy breath when she released him, "Damn it, Lola, warn a guy before you pull that shit. You sure on edge ever since…"_

_She rolled her eyes in frustration, her entire crew was walking on eggshells around her and she was sick of it. "Since Thessia? Since we lost to that bastard, Kai Leng?"_

_She paced back and forth, "I'm a sore loser, Vega. And I take it personally. So yeah, I'm on edge." She exhaled, her breath whistling against her teeth. "Now, back to my problem, my suit doesn't fit. Will you help me fix it or not?"_

_He stared at her for a long moment, trying to read her shuttered expression. He saw the flashes of anger flittering across her face, of stress and worry, but little else as she carefully schooled her features. _

"_Okay, Lola, I'll help you out."_

"_And no stupid comments," she stated in a tone that said he didn't have a choice._

"_Sure, Lola." He eyed her wearily before picking up a different chestplate, "What about this one, it will give you an even faster cooldown period on your amp, but you'll lose the power damage increase." _

_She frowned and looked at it. Sighing, she nodded and gestured to him to help her try it on._

She woke with a snort when she felt Kaidan shift beneath her, "I'm awake," she slurred sleepily.

He sighed, "No you weren't. I called your name a few times and you were fast asleep." He sighed, he didn't want to bother her with business, and he wanted her to get a decent night's sleep, but the universe seemed to be acting against them. "You're omni-tool pinged," he said reluctantly. She needed more rest, her skin was so pale it was almost transparent, and the dark circles under her eyes seemed to grow larger each day. Her appetite hadn't returned, and even Chakwas had expressed concern with her nutritional intake. "You got a message, and I was going to check if it was a priority or not before I woke you."

She smiled and rubbed a hand over his scruffy cheek, pressing her thumb to the slight indent on his chin, "Thanks," she said softly. She sat up, and pressed a lingering kiss to his lips, her gaze never leaving his. "Thank you for always taking care of me."

He scowled at her, "As if you let me." A hint of temper crept into his tone, and tried to prevent himself from lashing out at her. He bit the inside of his cheek hard enough to taste the coppery tang of blood.

She frowned, "Kaidan, if this is about the baby, I told you, we can't-"

"It's not about the damned baby, Shepard! It's you! It's always you! You run yourself ragged without a care for yourself!" he exploded as his temper bubbled over. "Everyone on this ship can see how this war is affecting you, but you brush off every attempt to help you, to ease some of the weight on your shoulders." His biotics spiked sharply as he shoved her feet from his lap and rose to pace the cabin.

"I don't," she replied, almost timidly. Sleep still clouded her brain and this had hit her out of the blue. She was still reeling from the brunt of his attack.

"You do," he hissed, "You don't have to oversee every goddamned weapon modification, and yet a few days again you were in the armory helping Vega and Cortez unload the shipment of new weapons. Vega sent me a message asking me if I had punched you in the face because of the circles under your eyes," He ground out, his jaw bulging as he clenched his teeth together.

She reeled back, blinking in surprise at that bit of information. "I-"

"I'm not finished," he growled, satisfied when her teeth clicked as she snapped her mouth shut. "You don't know a damned thing about tech, and yet Tali tells me you were in Engineering until 2 a. m. _helping_ her install upgrades to the drive core. She wanted to know if I ever let you sleep, since you spent the whole time yawning."

He scrubbed his hands through his hair, making it stick up in wild tufts, "Garrus wants to know why you don't take a few hours to yourself so you can relax and let me run the ship. He even _suggested_ I force you to take some down time."

She stared at him, the anger rolling off of him in waves. He was clearly furious with her. She took a few breaths to calm her trembling hands, her jaw twitching as she considered. She had a mission, a mission that took top priority, and there was no room for personal feeling. No room for _self._ "Kaidan, I can't slow down, the mission-"

"The mission is going to fail if you're dead, Shepard," he snapped at her. "And make no mistake, that is exactly where you're headed. You're so fucking exhausted you're starting to make mistakes, and it's starting to show to the crew." He ticked off on his fingers, "You rolled the wrong way on Thessia, that bastard was broadcasting his aim, any idiot could see that. But your brain was so tired, you couldn't see it." He pulled roughly on his fingers, "I don't know, if Garrus had been there, we could have still taken him down, but you made a mistake taking Liara along, too. Her emotions were too close to the surface to be any real help."

"Then why didn't you say something then!" she screamed at him, springing to her feet. "Why wait until now?!"

"Because you wouldn't have listened then. You're too damned stubborn," he shouted back, taking a step back when he realized the air was sparking with dark energy and objects from around the cabin were whizzing through the air. He stiffened and took a deep breath and prepared to utter one of the most difficult sentences he'd ever used in his career. "You are relieved of duty, Commander Shepard. You'll need to get medical clearance from Doctor Chakwas before you can resume command of your ship."

"I'm a Spectre, you asshole, you can't relieve me of duty," she spat angrily.

"I'm a Spectre, too and I do believe I just did." He said forcefully, and she took a reeling step backward from the challenge in his gaze, his eyes daring her confront him. She couldn't at present, and she knew it.

"Get out," she hissed to his back as he stormed out of the cabin.

"You couldn't make me stay," he shot over his shoulder before the door hissed shut behind him. He stalked stiffly to the elevator and selected the CIC.

He slumped against the wall as his anger fled. "What did I just do?"

Shepard stalked through her cabin, tired and furious. She stomped over to her terminal to read the message she'd received that had set this off. "It better be fucking worth it," she growled to herself. Her eyes narrowed as she read the message from Hackett. It seemed there was a lead from a Doctor Bryson on the Citadel. He had been conducting research on the Reapers for years and it could be crucial to building the Crucible.

She quickly typed out a reply and hit send. She frowned when the message was returned to her as undeliverable. She scowled, "EDI, make sure this message gets to Hackett. Top priority. Also, let Joker know to set a course for the Citadel."

There was a slight pause, "Shepard, the Major has left instructions that you are to _take a fucking nap, _and I do apologize for the language but those were his exact words. He also instructed that I delay any of your messages until such a time that he clears it." Her voice filtered through the cabin, setting Shepard's teeth on edge.

Bastard works fast, she thought. "EDI, need I remind you that I am in charge of this ship and-" she growled.

"Incorrect, Shepard. Major Alenko had relieved you of your duties. He has properly followed protocol set forth by the Alliance. I can recite the exact policy if you wish."

Shepard snapped her teeth together, "No, that won't be necessary." She curled her hand into a fist and let out a frustrated grunt. The air around her swirled with biotic energy and she heard the glass top of her desk crack under the onslaught of the shockwave.

She paced the floor, her temper building as she flared ever brighter. Her tightly held control was slipping and she knew it. It only served to piss her off further. She stalked over to the chest of drawers where Kaidan stored his clothes and scooped them up into her arms, ignoring his scent as it assaulted her nose.

Before her resolve weakened, she stormed over to the entrance of her cabin and waited, tapping a foot impatiently against the floor when the door did not open. "EDI, open this goddamn door."

"I apologize Shepard, but the Major has confined you to quarters until further notice."

Shepard howled in anger, a sound that was heard clearly through out the ship. She let her armful of clothing fall to the floor and focused her energy on the nearest heavy object, an armchair, and flung it as hard as she could at the door. She didn't flinch as it shattered under the force of the throw, fluff and feathers and splinters of wood and shards of metal exploding throughout the cabin.

She brought up her omni-tool and tapped out a message to Kaidan, _You. Asshole. Fuck you and the high horse you rode in here on._

She felt hot tears spring up in her eyes, spilling over as her exhaustion set in. He was right, and she knew it. She marched over to the bed and grabbed his pillow. Just because he was _right_ didn't make him any less _wrong. _She snatched her combat knife off her bedside table and made short work of his pillow. Throwing the knife point-down into the mattress on his side of the bed, she flung herself facedown on to the bed. An exhausted sleep claimed her as feathers floated around her trashed cabin.


	24. Chapter 24

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

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><p>Kaidan stood behind Joker in the CIC, struggling not to pace, or worse, rush up to Shepard's cabin and apologize. He was right, and he knew it. He glanced at his omni-tool when it pinged, and chuckled at the message he had received from Shepard. Sounded like her. He contemplated sending her a reply, He contemplated sending her a reply, but a message from Hackett that EDI had forwarded to him caught his eye "Joker, set a course to the Citadel, Hackett has a job for us."<p>

Joker cleared his throat, "It's your funeral, Major." He pulled his cap down over his eyes. "By the way, when Shepard breaks the door down, shall I tell her where you are and do you want a running start?"

"Zip it, Flight Lieutenant," Kaidan snapped at his old friend. "I posted Garrus outside her door, he was the only one brave enough to volunteer."

"Or stupid enough," Joker muttered. He hunched over his console, feeling Kaidan's glare on the back of his neck. "Next stop, the Citadel."

Kaidan turned sharply on his heels, intending to have a talk with Dr. Chakwas to ensure Shepard had at least two days to rest. He was stopped along the way by no less than ten people that all had minor issues that could easily been solved by their direct superiors. He was beginning to understand a major source of her stress.

"Ensign Copeland, do you normally take things like this…" he read the first line of the datapad, "Request for Shepard to appear in an advertising vid, do you routinely take these directly to the commander?"

Copeland stammered for a moment under the intense scrutiny of the Major. He swallowed hard, "Well, yes sir, I do."

"Tell me something, Ensign, why don't you take this to Specialist Traynor, your direct superior and _the individual in charge of Shepard's personal correspondence?_"

Kaidan glared at the younger man and reached up to his earpiece, "EDI, can you run the ship with Joker for a few minutes?"

"Of course, Major."

"Then order the crew to assemble in the armory _immediately_. No exceptions." He clapped his hand on Copeland's shoulder and steered him towards the elevator. "Actually EDI, there is one exception, Garrus can stay put."

Shepard woke groggily and wiped the drool from her cheek as she heard the announcement for the crew to assemble in the shuttle bay. She tilted her head to the side, "Now why would Alenko want to have a talk with the entire crew without me?" she murmured to herself, pursing her lips. She wandered over to her terminal, and winced at the cracked glass of her desktop. She frowned and took the laptop over to the bed, "EDI, is there any way you can show me the surveillance feeds for the armory? With sound?"

There was a hesitant pause, and she could practically hear EDI and Joker arguing if she should be allowed before EDI replied, "Major Alenko did not specify and there are no regulations preventing it. Very well, Commander. Queuing it up now."

Kaidan stood at attention in the center of the armory, his fury increasing as the crew strolled in at a leisurely pace. Cortez noticed the muscle twitching along his jaw as he ground his teeth together. He did a quick headcount to ensure everyone was in the room before snapping out an "Ah-Ten-_Shon_!" He and Vega each snapped to attention from their positions flanking their acting CO.

Approximately half the crew snapped to attention. The other half, seeing their peers, mimicked them half hearted. Kaidan saw red. His corona of dark energy swirled around him, exploding outward as he marched over to the nearest marine that had failed to properly salute. He gripped the corporal by the collar of his shirt and brought his face up to his level, dragging the man onto his tiptoes. "Your superior officer called you to attention, Corporal. Is there a reason for your insubordination?" he snarled. "See that it does not happen again," he snapped in disgust as the other man frantically shook his head and stammered out a wheezing _Sir, no sir!_

Kaidan glared around the room, "That goes for all of you maggots," he growled in a tone reminiscent of their days with the drill sergeant. "Your commanding officer has been relieved of duty because she was so fucking exhausted she can barely function. Do you know why?" he roared at the assembled crew.

"_Sir, no sir!"_

"Because of you assholes, yes, all of you supposed _marines, _are not using the proper chain of command!" he spat out, the muscle of his jaw twitching again.

"I led a group of fucking _teenagers_ that have more maturity than you lot. That understand and respect the chain of command. They are out there, risking their lives and fighting the good fight while you lazy jarheads are bothering the commander with interview requests and lost OSDs! You," he pointed at an ensign, "Who is your direct superior?"

The young woman stammered, "Wrong, drop and give me twenty." She stared at him dumbfound before dropping to the deck. "You, who does your superior officer report to?" he continued around the room, dropping marines as he went, adding to the tally of required push-ups. "I want a report on my desk by 1700 outlining the chain of command on this ship."

"You are lazy, and at this moment you are unfit to have the privilege of wearing the uniform of an Alliance soldier. Your commanding officer has given everything to this navy, and you do not have the common courtesy of showing her the respect her position demands." He stalked around the room, stepping over marines still performing their push-ups as he went. "You will, from this moment forward, know it, breathe it, sleep with it if you have to, but very few of you actually have the privilege of speaking to Commander Shepard. Do I make myself clear?"

"_Sir, yes sir!"_

He growled and looked around the ship as the crew wearily got back to their feet, "Note that I said one report. I dare you to get it wrong."

He nodded sharply at Vega and stalked towards the elevator. Vega snarled at a crewmember, "You were not dismissed, Private Patel. He glanced down at his watch, "You _pendejos _have, oh, fifteen minutes to get that report to Major Alenko. What do you think, Cortez, should we have them stay here at parade rest for ten minutes?"

Cortez considered, "Do you think they remember not to lock their knees? Woe to the marine that passes out."

Vega smiled lazily at the crew, their faces carefully blank as he watched them, "Yeah, I think ten minutes will do it."

Shepard snapped her laptop shut, swallowing hard. She pressed a hand to her forehead, startled to find her skin clammy and flushed. She pressed her lips together in a thin line as she snatched her hand away from her shorts. She was supposed to be pissed at him, not touching herself as he berated her crew for being assholes and defending her even as he took control of her ship. She shook herself, maybe it was best if he stayed away for a while longer, so she could work back up to being mad.

"EDI, that was all…real, right?" she scratched her chin as she considered, "I mean, it looked real, but Kai- Major Alenko didn't stage the for my benefit?"

She heard Joker chuckled over the comm. "Commander, it doesn't get more real than that.

"That is correct, Commander. Please note the power fluctuation in the drive core when Major Alenko flared his biotics. That is a most impressive display," EDI said cheerfully.

Shepard studied her screen and whistled softly, "I'll say, it's off the damn charts. I'm good, but I'm not that good."

"Commander, do you need us to send you up some clean pants? I can sense that yours are probably smoldering after that," Joker said gleefully.

"Can it, Lieutenant. I have spares," she muttered. "If you see Kai- Major Alenko, tell him I'm still pissed."

"Of course, Commander. As you should be," EDI replied. "You may be interested to know that the crew are currently conducting searches for the appropriate chain of command. I have taking the liberty of…misguiding their searches."

Shepard barked out a laugh, "EDI, that is just cruel.

Joker snorted, "They are marines, they should have known who they report to as soon as they stepped foot on this ship. No excuses. I hope Alenko rips them a new one again. It was amusing."

"Only because you weren't there, Joker." But she felt the slick coil of lust curling in her belly at the thought. An encore of that performance would probably have her forgiving him as soon as she clapped eyes on him again. "EDI, stop hindering the crew. They only have three more minutes. You don't have to assist them though. I'll leave that up to you.

She brought up the surveillance feeds, this time looking in the corridor outside her cabin. Garrus was standing guard, a miserable expression on his face. "Why is Garrus outside my door?" She wandered over to the door as EDI informed her he was on guard duty.

Shepard scoffed, "Garrus couldn't take me."

"In your current condition, Shepard, yeah, he could." She heard the hint of irritation in Joker's voice, "You have to take care of yourself, Commander. Otherwise, we'll lose everything."

Shepard sighed and scrubbed a hand over her face. "All right, Joker. Point made, I'll go take a nap. But send someone up with food, I'm hungry."

"Dr. Chakwas will bring you a tray in a few hours, Shepard. She would also like to exam you to see if you are clear to return to duty," EDI informed her.

She padded over to the bed and sheepishly pried the knife from the mattress, setting in on the bedside table before crawling beneath the quilt. She was grumbled to herself as she tossed around to find a comfortable position, but she couldn't deny that it was nice to have to opportunity to spend all day in bed if she wanted. Not that she was prepared, yet, to forgive Alenko by any means. Not by a long shot.


	25. Chapter 25

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>Kaidan climbed out of the transport to Bryson's Lab and quickly made his way through the door, rubbing his temple as he nursed a small pang of a headache. The sooner this was over, the better for several reasons. He hadn't seen Shepard in the days since he'd taken over the ship, and he was itching to see if she would forgive him or not. He wouldn't say he was desperate; one side of him longed to hold her in his arms and apologize. The other half wanted to shake her and keep her locked in her cabin, but he knew that wasn't an option.<p>

He waited patiently as Doctor Bryson finished making notes on an OSD, wandering around the lab as he did. He snorted at the husk head sitting on the desk when it screeched at him, what in the hell were they doing with that thing?

He looked up at the doctor from across the counter as he crossed over to greet him. "Major Alenko, a pleasure to meet you, but I was told to expect Commander Shepard."

Kaidan shook his hand, "Likewise, Doctor. Unfortunately, the Commander was detained and couldn't make it. I'm her XO, so I came instead. So, what news do you have for me?" Kaidan's tone was courteous yet firm, the voice of a seasoned soldier that wouldn't take no for an answer, despite the other man's hesitation.

Bryson studied the younger man and decided he could be trusted. He told him about the task force Admiral Hackett had created to investigate rumors surrounding the Reapers shortly after the Battle of the Citadel. He believed he and Dr. Garneau were on the verge of a major discovery, something that could turn the tide of the war.

As the doctor continued to detail his research, Kaidan noticed the doctor's assistant, Derek Hadley, moments too late as the young man walked jerkily towards them, a pistol trained on Bryson's heart. "_No!_" Kaidan shouted the gunshot echoed throughout the room, his aura flaring brightly as he caught the man in a powerful stasis field. He dropped to his knees, his omni-tool flickering to life on his arm as he scanned the older man. "EDI, send C-Sec to my location, tell them I have a casualty and a prisoner."

He pushed to his feet and turned towards Hadley, "Why did you kill Bryson! What did you stand to gain from his death?"

He was shocked when Hadley resisted the pull of his stasis field to turn his head towards him, blood dripping from his nose and ears. "Turn back," he stated in an oddly guttural voice, as though someone else was speaking through him. Kaidan narrowed his eyes, remembering when the rachni queen had used deceased krogan as her voice.

"Who am I speaking to? Where can I find you? How are you controlling him?" Kaidan demanded of the otherworldly voice, shaking the man's shoulders. "_Shit_," he swore when Hadley began seizing as two C-Sec officers burst into the lab with their weapons drawn. Kaidan rubbed his forehead as he felt his headache spark into the beginnings of a migraine behind his eyes. All the stress from the last few days was finally breaking him down. "Get him to the hospital, he's useless to me now."

He glanced over at EDI as she entered the lab. "Glad you could join me, EDI. We need to find out where this Dr. Garneau is. Bryson didn't exactly get around to telling me before he was shot. Any suggestions?" He winced when he turned his head too quickly and sharp tendrils of pain pricked behind his eyes. "And the sooner the better," he whispered hoarsely as even the sound of his own voice was starting to make him wince. His migraine was escalating, the bright lights of the screens and his search in the darker areas of the rooms was wearing on him.

EDI studied him and nodded, quietly assisting him as they search the lab. She hacked Bryson's terminal, but found it had been wiped. They studied information Bryson had collected on creature sightings as well as element zero deposits, on the Reapers themselves and EDI was able to narrow the possible systems down to one: Aysur. "I apologize, Major, but I cannot narrow it down any further."

The pain in his head had increased during the hours they had spent searching from a dull, throbbing ache at the base of skull and eyes only to have worked its way up around the amp and peak to a painful point at the top of his skull. Sheer will alone was keeping him upright and functioning. He was past the point of caring if EDI could pinpoint an exact location. "That's okay, EDI," he croaked, "Let's just get back to the ship. We'll head to the system and scout around."

"Of course, Major," she replied, trailing behind as he climbed into the transport to head back to theNormandy.

He grimaced at the sound of her voice and spared a moment to set the transport on autopilot before slumping back into his seat. He pressed a hand over his eyes to block out the light. "_I've had migraines before, this one is no different_," he told himself as he briefly considered having Chakwas meet him at the airlock with a dose of his meds. He just as quickly dismissed the idea as he hated the drugs, the side effect were almost as bad as the headache itself. They made his tongue feel thick and his brain foggy. Worst of all was the oppressive exhaustion the drugs brought on that would put him out of commission for at least 24 hours.

He opened one eye to a narrow slit when the transport came to a stop and nearly whimpered with relief as the docking of the Normandy loomed in front of him. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment before exhaling a shallow breath as he steeled himself for the upcoming decontamination cycle. The change in pressure always wreaked havoc on his senses and he was dreading it in his already hypersensitive state.

He strode purposefully into the airlock and waited impatiently as the decon cycle processed. A strong wave of nausea threatened to send his lunch back up and it took all his will to swallow back the heave sticking in his throat. He took a staggering step into the cockpit and heard Joker's whispered intake of breath as though he meant to speak. He sensed EDI make a motion with her hand to maintain the blessed quiet that was less grating on his nerves. He swallowed again to steel himself to walk normally through the CIC. He had the crew living in proper respect of his position now, and he didn't want anything to change that.

He headed towards the elevator, keeping his eyes glued to the floor. He missed the crewmembers on deck-scrubbing duty as punishment for failing to complete the report on chain of command he'd assigned them a few days ago. He sighed with relief as the elevator door slid shut and spared a thought of thanks for EDI as the lights instantly dimmed. His hand automatically selected the floor for Shepard's cabin, and he stumbled inside, passing Garrus in the hallway without a word, and heading straight for the bed.

"It takes some balls to come strolling back in here after locking me in for three days."

He groaned at the sound of her voice, and wished she would just _shut up_. "Shepard, I really don't care what you have to say at the moment," he croaked, laying down on the bed and pulling a pillow over his head.

"You don't…what?" Shepard blinked in confusion. She had been prepared for a fight, and he wasn't being obliging and giving her one. It was pissing her off. "You don't get to come in here after locking me in this room and think we're not going to have a _discussion_ about this! _You relieved me of duty_!" she hissed, choosing to ignore the signs that he was in the throes of a migraine. His skin was pale and clammy looking, and one part of her wanted to rub her hands through his hair and massage his scalp near his implant. A small other part of her wanted him to suffer a little, much like she had suffered for three days of forced inactivity. It was pure torture for a woman that was used to constant activity.

"_Just. Shut. Up_," he pulled his head out from under the pillow and hissed at her. "If you want to self-destruct, fine, go. Just do it _silently_." He pulled it back down hard over his head to block out sound and light, a slight whimper escaping his lips - he immediately regretted brushing her off since it set loose another wave of nausea and pain.

Shepard reeled back a step, clearly he was in no condition to fight back, and she didn't want to kick him further while he was down. She narrowed her eyes, making mental note to discuss this when he wasn't drooling like an idiot into her pillow and with a final glance at his prone form, she turned on her heels and strode out of the door. It was time to take back her ship.

She found Garrus fleeing to the elevator and nipped in after him just as the doors were closing. The turian eyed her, half expecting her to kill him for assisting Kaidan with his coup.

"So Garrus, long time no see."

"Uh, yeah. Say, you look…better."

He saw her run her tongue over her teeth as she considered her words. She just shrugged and stepped out of the door into the CIC when the elevator stopped. She glanced back over her shoulder and leveled a look at him, "If you ever assist someone in the commandeer my ship again, I'll cut your gizzard out and feed it to Wrex." She shoved her hands in her pockets and strolled off, not waiting to see him sputter in shock.

"Traynor, where is Alenko taking my ship?" she barked as she walked past Sam on the way to the cockpit.

Sam's eyes widened and she gave an awkward shrug. She hadn't forgotten Kaidan's lesson from the other day, in addition to the fact that she was aware that Chakwas hadn't cleared Shepard for duty yet. "He didn't tell me, Commander."

She got a similar answer from the other crew members she passed, all reluctant to speak to her and some outright fleeing at the sight of her. She paused beside a young woman scrubbing the deck on her hands and knees, puzzled at the sight. "Westmoreland, what are you doing?"

She shot to her feet and snapped off a salute, "Scrubbing the deck, ma'am."

"Clearly. Precisely why are you scrubbing the deck?" she drawled as she rolled her eyes.

Westmoreland looked around nervously, refusing to meet Shepard's eyes, "Major Alenko assigned the task to me for failing to report my knowledge on the chain of command for the Normandy."

Shepard shook her head in bemusement, "You can go back to your post, Private. Alenko isn't in charge anymore."

"Ah, no thank you ma'am." she remained at parades rest, speaking to the Commander, nervously swallowing before continuing. "There's been no announcement that you have been put back on duty and, as per my orders, I am required to finish this task assigned to me by Major Alenko before I go back to my post," she replied, cringing as Shepard narrowed her eyes at her. She wasn't used to being defied, especially by her crew.

"As you were, then," she growled and stalked toward the cockpit. "Joker," she barked in irritation, "What the fuck has Alenko done to my crew?"

Joker swiveled around to face her "I don't know, Shepard. I kind of like it. They're acting like real Marines now instead of a band of misfits. Watch this." He pointed a finger at a nearby corporal, "Hey, you! Go get me some juice or something. I'm thirsty."

The corporal shot to his feet and saluted, "Yes sir!" and headed towards the elevator.

"I could get used to this," Joker smirked and turned back towards his nav console.

Shepard scowled, shaking her head at him, "Where are we heading, anyway?"

"Uh…"

"Shepard, you have not yet been cleared for active duty by acting Commanding Officer Major Alenko or Chief Medical Officer Chakwas. You must return to your cabin immediately," EDI informed her primly from her position in the co-pilot's seat, a suspicious expression on her face.

"Kaidan sprung me."

"That is not accurate. He has not updated your file, and had Major Alenko not been suffering from a severe migraine, he likely would have ensured you stayed confined to your cabin." EDI replied, disbelief evident in her tone.

"C'mon, EDI, Kaidan won't be angry with you if you tell Shepard where we're heading. He's got a soft spot for her anyway."

"Jeff, you were not present when Major Alenko ordered me to be certain that Shepard _takes a fucking nap_!" Shepard blinked in amusement as EDI used a recording of his actual voice, his tone snapping with anger.

"He actually said 'fucking'? That doesn't sound like Kaidan." Shepard chuckled to herself. She was finding it hard to stay angry, in spite of the circumstance of the crew's refusal to acknowledge her as their commanding officer once more.

"Oh yes, he 'fucking' did," muttered the corporal delivering Joker's drink. "I was there. Scary."

Shepard considered that as he went back to his duty station and just shrugged, he was pretty pissed when he locked her in their cabin. "So, EDI, where are we going?"

EDI paused as though she was processing her request. "Shepard, if I tell you, in return, you will return to your cabin until Major Alenko sees fit to release you. If you fail to do so, I will summon Lieutenant Vega to escort you. The choice is yours."

"EDI, you don't get to order me around. Just tell me where we are going," she replied testily, annoyed by the prissy tone.

"Very well, Shepard." There was a long pause before EDI continued. "We are traveling to the Aysur system to scan for clues as to the location of one Dr. Garneau."

"Who's Garneau? Catch me up, I'm out of the loop."

"Garneau was a research partner with Dr. Bryson. Bryson was researching rumors about the Reapers and had been for some time. He believed he had found a weapon that could wipe out the Reapers, or at minimum, cause significant damage."

"You keep saying was. Is Bryson dead?" Shepard paced behind Joker's chair, considering the implications of said weapon.

"Yes, his research assistant shot him before he could share details of his research with Major Alenko." EDI replied, fiddling with the console in front of her.

Shepard licked her lips; EDI was acting somewhat out of character. She never fiddled, and she was avoiding Shepard's pointed gaze. She opened her mouth to question the AI, but was interrupted before she could utter a word.

"Lola, hey!" James greeted her exuberantly, clamping a hand over her shoulder to hold her in place. "I see you're looking better now!"

"Get your hands off me, Vega." She snarled at him, shrugging her shoulder away from him.

James raised an eyebrow and dropped his voice, "Do you really want to cause a scene, Shepard?"

A muscle in her jaw twitched as she stared at him, her anger mounting. "I am your commanding officer, and I order you to stand down, Lt. Vega." She hissed at him, well aware that the entire CIC was focused on them.

James shrugged and grabbed her by her wrist, "That's where you are wrong, actually. Alenko is the commanding officer and you've been relieved of duty until Chakwas says so. Your choice, Lola. The easy way or the hard way," he said quietly, pointing at his shoulder, implying he was ready to heave her over his shoulder if he had to.

"I could kill you for this," she threatened, and dark energy swirled over his fists. Her movements were halted when Cortez stepped up behind James just shook his head. Something about his quiet presence had her backing down. She blinked, wondering what exactly was wrong with her - she just threatened to kill her own crew... maybe she _should_ go see the doctor.

"There is a better way, Shepard," he murmured, and with a scowl hiding her worry, she let the accumulated energy dissipate. "Besides, we're just following regs. You should do the same."

"Fine," she snapped, realizing they were right, and marched off towards the elevator. "Let's just go see what Dr. Chakwas has to say about this."

As it happened, Chakwas had very little to say aside from some _tsking_ noises and shooing Vega and Cortez from the room. "Shepard, you're not ready for active duty yet. Another day or two will fix you right up and you'll be back in the trenches in no time." She leaned on the bed across from Shepard, "You need more sleep, you're body can't keep up in spite of your implants. If Miranda were here, she would be admonishing you for threatening her work."

Shepard looked down at her hands, "I- I don't sleep well. I have nightmares constantly, so I suppose…I'm just avoiding sleeping."

Chakwas studied her for a moment before nodding, "That is perfectly understandable considering your situation and the burden that has been placed on your shoulders. Driving yourself into an early grave, albeit a second one, will not help us to win this war. Certainly you see that?" Shepard stared at her before shrugging in defeat and nodding. "I can help you sleep, at least for a few hours. I can't promise it will be dreamless, but I'll be here to monitor you and I will wake you if I see signs of distress."

Shepard sighed and wished she had gone to Chakwas weeks ago. She had seen the doctor sporadically over the last few days, but this was the first she had offered a reasonable compromise. "Okay. But just for a few hours, all right?"

Chakwas just nodded and set the pressure syringe against her arm, depressing the plunger to inject the drug into her system. She was out before she could ask when it would take effect.


	26. Chapter 26

Disclaimer: The Mass Effect franchise and its characters belong to Bioware. Celia Shepard is all mine. Enjoy!

* * *

><p>She had her few hours of dreamless sleep and woke to the feeling of eyes watching her. She blinked groggily and looked around, stretching her arms over her head as she sat up.<p>

"Hey."

Her focus snapped to the sound of his voice, soft and husky and oh-so-Kaidan. She tensed reflexively, uncertain what was about to follow.

"You're an asshole, Shepard," he quietly informed her from his position leaning against the bed across from her, his arms crossed over his chest. He sighed and picked up a tray of food he'd brought for her. He heard her stomach rumble and held it out to her, "Here, I thought you might be hungry."

"Thanks," she said reluctantly and set the tray in her lap. "I'm an asshole?" she asked, her brow furrowed deeply as she frowned. She picked up the fork on her tray and toyed with the lump of mashed potatoes on her plate. She sucked in a deep breath and pinched the bridge of her nose, "You're probably right." She set the tray aside and looked up, her eyes meeting his for the first time in days. There were new lines etching themselves in the sensitive skin around his eyes, and she could see the worry and concern reflected back at her.

She could also see he still suffered a bit from the dregs of his migraine by the set of his lips pressed in a thin line and the pallor of his normal olive tones. She slid off the bed and took the few short steps to press herself against his chest, her fingers reaching up to comb through his hair to gently massage the scalp around his implant.

He closed his eyes briefly and reached up to wrap his hand around her outstretched arm, stilling her movements. "For the record, I stand by my actions, Shepard, and I would do it again if I feel I need to." His other hand skimmed up her side to wrap around her waist, gently gathering her close. "But I am sorry for the way it happened."

She swallowed the lump forming in her throat and felt the hot prickle of tears in her eyes. She pressed her face into his chest and tried to summon some of the anger that had been fueling her for days but found the tank was now empty. "I'm sorry, too. I shouldn't have lost control like that, I was acting like a child."

His hand found her chin and tilted her head back to study her face, his teeth worrying his bottom lip. "Promise me you'll take care of yourself. I lost you once, Shepard. I can't lose you again. I won't." He gently pushed her away and paced the length of the medbay. "I was so damned angry with you. And scared. And I started to think if there was something I was doing wrong, something I could be doing differently to help you."

He paused in front of the pane of glass looking out into the mess, and watched the crew hurrying past on their way to dinner or to their duty stations. "It struck me that you aren't used to asking for _help_. Everyone in this galaxy seems to need you to help them with something, and yes, you are bringing the people together to build the Crucible in order to help save Earth, but that isn't _personal_." He turned to face her, saw her leaning against the foot of the bed, an almost inscrutable expression on her face. Her eyes followed him as he resumed his pacing, considering his next words.

"Let me help you. Please," he stopped in front of her and placed his hands on her shoulders, the corner of his lips twitching in a tiny smile when she tilted her head back to look up at him. He slid his hand down her arm to lift her left hand, his thumb rubbing over the deep blue stone sitting on her ring finger. "You know, this right here, it means you should let me shoulder some of your burdens so you aren't crushed under the weight. Let me be your partner in more than just words, Shepard."

She swallowed and licked her lips, "I've never been very good at sharing."

He chuckled, and the husky sound pushed the remaining tension out of the room, "Don't I know it." He lowered his head so his lips hovered above hers, "Will you let me help you?" He felt her hands drift up his chest to fist in his shirt. He smiled at her, "Will you let me love, protect and cherish you for the rest of our lives? Whether we live to see 150 or we die together in a blaze of glory tomorrow?"

She felt a hard knot form in her throat, she'd never expected this, never dreamed of the unconditional love he had for her. Her lashes glittered with unshed tears, she replied, "Yes, but only if you promised to let me do the same." She sealed her words with her lips on his, felt his body shift forward to press against hers. His thickly muscled thigh slid between hers and she shivered, her lips parting as his tongue swept over her full bottom lip.

She tasted sweet and sultry at the same time, and he groaned as he deepened the kiss, missing the feel of her lips moving against his, her fingers grasping and tugging at the edges of his uniform. He gently bit down on her lip, drawing it between his own to suck lightly on it. Her soft moan met his ears and his hands tightened on her waist, grinding her hips against his fast stiffening erection. He felt her fingers dance along the waist of his pants, searching for the clasp of his belt. Her finger brushed against the protruding bulge between them, her thumb stroking along his length. He shivered in anticipation.

His lips trailed along the strong line of her jaw, down the sleek column of her neck, stopping at the shallow divot where her collarbones met. He heard her suck in a breath as he ran his tongue against her salty skin, tasting her. The sheen of moisture lingered on her skin as his lips found hers again. Arms snaked up to wrap around his shoulders, her fingers entwining in the curly hair at the nape of his neck.

"Tell me you forgive me," he rasped as his arms tightened around her waist, pulling her close against him.

"No," she breathed, and his expression fell in disappointment before he noticed her blue eyes blazing, her pupils dilated with desire. She sidestepped him, her fingers still curved around the back of his neck, a come-hither pout on her lips as she took a backwards step. He licked his lips as the gentle pressure from her warm hand urged him to follow her and the jack of his implant hummed from the static building between them. "Let me show you."

She smirked and took another step back, pleased as he followed her lead. Her back met the door to the AI core, and she moaned when his lips devoured hers. His hands seemed everywhere at once, pressed flat against the cool metal of the door in one moment, tugging at her shirt in the next. "EDI, unlock the door," she managed on a low groan as his palm snuck under her shirt to cup her breast, his lips pressed firmly against the pounding pulse in her throat. She arched her back against the onslaught of sensation he ignited in her.

There was a heavy pause, "Shepard…" EDI began.

"Open the damn door, EDI," Kaidan growled against Shepard's skin. They didn't notice EDI's offended protest as the door slid open at her back and she lost her balance and tumbled towards the floor. In a lightening fast move, his hands wrapped around her waist and steadied her, pulling her back against his chest. His hands slid down the curve of her back, gripping the globes of her ass as he lifted her.

Her legs slid around his waist, her firm thighs gripping him tightly as he took the short steps towards the console at the back of the room. Her fingers laced in his curly locks, bringing his lips back to hers as his hands hit the clasp of her belt, loosening her pants. A low groan filled the air as her hands left his hair, instead using his shoulders for leverage as she arched her hips off the console. He shimmied her pants down her long, sleek legs and his warm palms found her knees. Shivering as his hands slid up her thighs, she set her mouth to his throat, her teeth nipping lightly against the exposed skin.

Her head fell back with a moan as his thumb found her heated entrance, stroking along her damp folds until her found her sensitive bud nestled in the soft curls between her thighs. Her back arched as his fingers toyed with her, rubbing her glistening sex, teasing her aching center with one thick finger, then two, dragging a ragged groan from deep in her throat.

Breaths left her in panting gasps as she struggled to focus, to force her limp hands to tug at the belt hugging his hips, hiding the prize she sought from view. Her teeth worried her bottom lip as her fingers flicked open the fly of his pants and with a wicked grin and a slight shake of his hips they were pooling around the boots he hadn't bothered to remove. She heard his sharp intake of breath as her cool hand wrapped around his length, her thumb swirling over the sensitive head. His movements stilled as her hand pumped up and down his thick cock, his fingers poised at her slick entrance.

"Shepard," he groaned as his hips thrust forward into her firm grip. He watched her tongue dart out to moisten her lips, her gaze burning on his as she watched him, her hands maintaining the slow, firm strokes. He panted as he struggled to return his focus to his task, sinking a long finger into her wet heat.

She gasped and her silken movements stuttered as her breath hissed from her. Her thighs twitched as he gave her a wolfish grin and his finger resumed their ministrations, stroking her wet lips, rubbing her swollen clitoris. He frowned slightly as one of her hands left him to fist in his shirt until she jerked him closer. Her legs hitched up around his waist to pull him against her and her mouth crashed against his, her tongue flickering against his lips.

They both moaned as she positioned him against her, his smooth tip slipping into her tight sheath. He stilled his hips there and their panting was the only sound that they could hear over the pounding of their hearts in their chests. He could feel her thighs straining against his hips as he fought the urge to slam into her so the slap of skin on skin filled the air.

Her breasts heaved as she held his gaze, her fingers still wrapped around the base of his erection, his thumb still slowly circling her nub. "I need to be buried inside you, Shepard," he rasped, his eyes never leaving hers as her hand left him to curl against his hip, as oh-so-slowly he filled her, sliding into her inch by torturous inch. He slid his arms around her and his mouth fused to hers once more as he pulled out to fill her again. Over and over, faster and faster, he pumped into her as her slick walls pulsed and quivered around him.

Their groans filled the air as well as the sound of flesh slapping against flesh, her sobbing gasp of breath as she reached her climax and his grunt of pain as her fingernails bit into his skin. Her shuddering moans as he pounded into her, his arms wrapped tightly around her as he gave a harsh shout when she tightened around him with a soft cry of her own as he emptied into her.

He pressed his brow to hers as he slumped forward against her, sweaty and spent. She gave him a dazed smile as she laid a hand against his chest, feeling his heart thundering beneath her hand. "I do forgive you," she murmured and tilted her head back to press her lips to his. "Do me a favor, though. Next time, just talk to me before you torment my crew, as panty igniting as that was."

He coughed in an unsuccessful attempt to hide his laughter, "Panty igniting?"

"You know, when my panties spontaneously combust from the heat between my- Never mind," she stammered and looked away, suddenly embarrassed.

She blinked in astonishment as his tilted her chin back so her gaze met his again, "I'll endeavor to ignite your panties more often," he smirked, his tone husky and seductive.

She tilted her head to the side, "Mission accomplished, Major," she breathed.

"Glad to hear it, Commander," he smiled, and shook his head in amusement.

"Do, uh, you think EDI feels violated?" she asked, looking warily around the AI core, as she noticed their location for the first time, a blush rising to her cheeks. "We're…at her."

"EDI is the ship. Try not to think about it," he murmured as he reached down to pull his pants back up his hips. She slid off the console and he steadied her as her own bottoms threatened to trip her. "I meant what I said before, Shepard. You and me, forever."

She laid her palm against his cheek and smiled, "Next time we're on the Citadel, we should make it official. What's the point of waiting?"

Kaidan eyed her carefully, "Our mothers would murder us," he muttered darkly, uncertain if she was teasing or not.

"We're Spectres. We don't answer to our mothers," she said haughtily.

"I don't think it works that way, Celia," he replied and stooped to help her with her pants, deftly tucking in her shirt before buckling her belt for her. "But if that is what you want, we can."

She smiled and her face lit up, "Yeah, I think it is."


End file.
